Nocturnal Wonderings

It's June

2011-06-03T03:35:00.002-04:00

It's June third or something like that so I can admit that yes, the hostage was released into loving hands before the presumed date and yes, it was gobbled up.

That said, it wasn't perfect and I figure that comes with too high expectations but damn, something was missing. It's still a great book but not my fav of the series.

The good news is that finally reading the book let my brain break free from whatever lock it had with the publication of the book. My mind had no interest in any other book but now I'm free!

But it's summer now and I'm doing some HTML coding that's making my head hurt and I just got a 3rd Tax installment but hey, where's the first two?! and reading gets slim which is never a surprise. Just the same ol', same ol'.

I'm watching Damages season 1 right now and I just bought The Walking Dead (which is only 6 episodes but I need something to watch!) and then after that Bob's in trouble cause I'll be up with nothing to do. And that never works.

Hope you are enjoying your first draft of summer. Bring on the heat!

Quick Update

2011-05-24T03:38:00.003-04:00

Everything is going along smoothly at the reno house which is great.

My Brother and his SO split big time over the weekend and it's ugly. I will tell you now, getting anything out of my Brother is painful so I couldn't imagine what it would be like to be his girlfriend/wife. There were together 9 years but something over the past few months ruptured even though Brother had said everything was fine. I guess it wasn't. I'm very sad for them both but I'm thinking their life must have had 'drama' cause the break-up has had it's drama.

But I digress.

Here's the skinny.

There are a few bookstores around here that are holding a certain book hostage (yes, that's how I'm feeling). So tomorrow (because it was a holiday today) I'm going to call around and see if anyone will sell me the book now. Cause I'm bad that way. And I really, really, want to read the damn book already!!

Okay, that's it for now. Hope all is well with you guys!

A Change for the Better!

2011-05-09T03:03:00.004-04:00

This one is about books but some real life updates.

Bob and his handy helper have gutted the entire reno house and are onto the rebuild section of the job. This is serious progress and I couldn't be more proud of how hard my guys are working. Also, with me on his back - uh side, Bob has made great strides with staying within our budget outline and at times even coming in under on certain items. This has freed up money for a few things we didn't account for so all is going well.

On a belated note:

Happy Mother's Day!!

I bought my mom a Kobo e-reader from Chapters. It looks fantastic and I know Kristie(J) loves hers so I thought it would be better than my old standby which is gift certificates. Now, my mom is a reader but she doesn't read what I read which doesn't bother me in the least.

However:

My Mom was quite bewildered by what a Kobo was. So I said, 'You know how Oprah loves her Kindle? It's like that only the Canadian version of it'. Mom: 'Oh, I've never paid attention to that'.

CURSES!!

Anyways Baby Benjamin (too cute!) was being way too delightful for me to set up the reader for her but I will head over later in the week to see if she needs some help. I did show her the size of the lettering option and she seemed pleased with it.

So, I might own an e-reader if my Mom doesn't take to it like she took to texting on her phone. I have no clue how to text from a phone so I figured my Mom would have no problems with a machine that has fewer buttons.

And finally!!

I have decided to go back to my archaic way of creating a TBB list.

See, I hit all my blog spots and ohh and ahh over the books and think to myself 'Oh, I'll remember that title or author' and every single time I go into the store and have no clue what I may have wanted to try.

So I picked out a pretty fushia pink journal that I'm now writing titles, authors and thoughts in. This journal will stay near the desk for when my kitties get their mommy (me) gift certificates to Chapters! It will also go to the store with me when I know I'm heading to Chapters. I think this method will once again prove extremely useful in purchasing and finding new authors.

Okay, off for now. Hope you all had an excellent weekend!

New Digs

2011-04-15T00:00:00.004-04:00

Sorry, I'm definitely around but as you can see from this post written an entire week ago - I have just a few things going on! On a harder note this past week we had to put our family cat down - he was 20 and my mom was a wreck and my dad wasn't looking to fresh either. He had us all around him and I miss him horribly. It's just been too tough to even write about it and that's another reason I've been a touch quiet.

Onwards - written 2 Thursdays ago.

Tomorrow is the day we get the new (old) renovation house. This renovation will be a B&C production unlike the previous 3 reno homes which were with partners. I'm considering writing a book about the last reno because the crap that hit the fan is something people think we exaggerate about. Sadly we didn't. And it was bad. Yet, here we are again but this time we're doing it ourselves. It will be interesting to see how Bob and I solve things together but if last night was any indication, we're already going to be in for some rough waters.

It turns out Bob doesn't A) listen to me when I talk, B) listens and then forgets, C) listens and then does what he wants. Any of those options don't really work for me but hopefully this reno will only take a maximum of 3 months unlike the previous ones which were 9 months and at times painful to the marriage component of life. The idea for this one is to get in and out fast, remember there is a ceiling to profit for the location and to keep Bob on track.

Interestingly enough it's the Keeping Bob on Track option that will be the toughest. Bob's train apparently runs much like mine and skips all over the place so yeah, there's that. Also, Bob does everything in his own time and my need to control things makes it difficult for us to work together.

Eg. Bob's new company - I'm the accountant on record and I need to pay some invoices. Only I'm not getting the invoices and I'm on Bob about getting things done in a timely fashion. So today he hands me the invoices but then says the amounts might not be right because we're HST exempt and the bills have HST on them. Uh, okay, so how do we actually find out? I was ready to call the businesses to tell the our HST number but then Bob's all 'wait, I'll do it tomorrow' because I'm sure he's not sure about what he is talking about.

Head meet wall.

So basically this is your warning that the blog will become quieter or there will be lots of whining about paint, floors, kitchens, time lines, budgets and finally, real estate peeps. I'm a touch scared of the next few months because I'm not nearly in enough shape to do as much as my mind thinks I can and well, that's the main thing.

On June 1st however, I will stop everything to read one book. Kiss of Snow by Singh. Bob's been warned but I'm thinking those earlier options I mentioned above may come into play.

So I'll hide.

Surrender to An Irish Warrior by Michelle Willingham

2011-04-09T00:08:00.006-04:00

Wow. So that's what Harlequin Historicals can be like.

I have to give a huge shout out to Super Librarian Wendy for this recommendations because there was no way this book would have normally crossed my path. Surrender to an Irish Warrior by Michelle Willingham made Wendy's best of 2010 Reads and thankfully she gave me just enough information that I wanted to read this book immediately.

Cut to three months later and finally after a few pages I got sucked right in.

I love all kinds of romance but I really appreciate darker stories because in real life, bad things happen to great people. In my early years of reading the hero always saved the heroine justintime. And even though it is a wonderful thing to have happen, there are many times in life when a hero gets there too late if at all. Knowing a hero is going to arrive in time to save the heroine from even a scratch takes away from any tension the author is trying to build - at least for me.

Okay, so that's probably a post for another day about how I like to see the pain and the joy, I want it all. So we'll leave off there for now.

Surrender to an Irish Warrior is truly a wonderful romance that brought a few tears to my eyes. There are no easy outs in this story and the journey from being two completely broken people to two healed lovers looking forward to the future was hard fought and won.

Trahern MacEgan is a man with only one thing on his mind - vengeance. While away for a few months his fiance Ciara was killed during a brutal and savage attack on her village. He is a former bard or story teller who had an easy smile and brought joy to many villages but now he only has one agenda and that is to avenge the death of Ciara.

While on this path he comes across a young girl who insists he help her and he cannot turn his back on an innocent. She brings him to a cottage where a women (Morren O'Reilly) is feverish and losing her baby. It is through a day or so that Trahern learns that Morren was gang raped by the men who destroyed her village and killed Ciara.

Once Trahern and Morren come together they are rarely apart and I like that kind of romance. It's a quiet story and as much as violence had happened it wasn't shown on the page until the near the end when it was about the villains and their due.

I really enjoyed watching these two fall in love and more importantly, to see how Morren would learn to accept the touch of Trahern. It's slow and beautifully done.

There are no big misunderstandings but there are a few places that were a little too sweet for lack of a better word but that was closer to the end of the story.

In the end, I would like to read other books by Ms. Willingham although Wendy has mentioned that this book was more of a departure from what she has written before. So with such a big TBR and TBB pile, I'm going to wait and see which of her other books I will pick up.

B+

Me and Baby B

2011-04-02T04:04:00.007-04:00

Yep, that's me in all my glory getting to snuggle up with Baby Benjamin. Turns out the happy parents have different ways of spelling Benjamin and now the new names have stuck.

Benjiman - that was what his dad wrote in a card. When the baby stretches he get one arm way up in the air and the other is fisted close to his body and his Extremely Proud Gram now says 'Benji Man!' like he's a super hero. Seriously too cute.

I have to say I will hog the baby. It just happens. But this past Tuesday night I loosened my grip and let my Mom have some feeding time with him - then my dad gets in there an picks him up and talks to him. I have to say it's quite a joy to see the family take to such a little guy so fast.

I asked Gorgeous Cousin if she remembers her life before Ben (7 weeks ago) and she just smiles and shakes her head. Watching her be a mom is also a new joy - I see him about 2x a week and I just feel so content after getting to spend some time with him and GC and my Aunt who is his Gram.

But I'm nothing if not over protective of my Gorgeous Cousin and she has kind of let the diabetes aspect of her life get a wee bit out of control. So she gets my stern look which always makes her laugh but she gets up and takes her sugar just for me so I don't worry so much.

And we'll finish with his early pictures from when he got home.

I think they took the picture on the left for Cousin Cindy because Benji is holding a MONKEY!!! And the family knows how I feel about monkeys. Lookit him in jeans and a Tee - the shirt he has on say Star Wars on it and of course I bought it for him! I believe this is him week 1.

Picture on the right was the day he came home - the giraffe is from Bob and I and the lion is from my brother and I know I'm biased but I'm thinking navy blue is his colour!

Okay, I'll stop gushing now. Thanks for letting me share the new little love in our lives. This new little guy is going to get spoiled rotten!

P.S. GC hasn't had to buy diapers yet (again, it's been 7 weeks) - Bob and I would buy them on sale and then my brother has shown up a few times with diapers so yeah, I can see him getting spoiled at Christmas - too bad he won't have a clue what's going on!

Here and There

2011-03-30T05:27:00.003-04:00

I know, original but I liked the mix with the last post title.

So what's new with you? I hope you are all doing well!

What's new with us?

So many things I'm not sure where to start.

Just for fun, I make sure I get to see Baby Ben at least twice a week. It's funny how such a small little man can make me feel utter joy. Don't know if I've mentioned or not but Gorgeous Cousin rocks as a mom and I'm so proud of how she is handling everything. Especially since her SO has not found a job down our way so he's only home on weekends. I also feel horrible for him because I know how it feels to leave the baby and he's not mine!

I'm just so proud of her and Ben is such a good baby. He has his fussy moments but he's only driven his new mommy to tears once and that was early days home with her SO to help and the baby wouldn't stop crying. But I just love the light he has brought to the family. I actually enjoy watching all my family interact with him and that's saying something because I will hog that baby gleefully.

Okay, next!

Bob and I were approached by our former neighbour to ask if we would purchase their house and do a flip. We were floored and we explained to the person that she would be better off putting the house on the market as we wouldn't be able to touch market price. She insisted she wanted us to have the house (in truth Bobby - people do love the Bob) so we got her an agent but she went with our offer - soooooo, sometime in early May we may just be the proud new owners of our 4th renovation house.

Don't tell Bob but I'm a touch excited by all the possibilities and Bob and I have decided to go in with no partners so really, it's just he and I making all the decisions. Bob went a bit over the top with the original design but we've talked through it and I think he understands where I'm coming from and how best to make our money on it.

On top of all that, Bob is holding down 2 other jobs and was essentially offered a third the other day. I keep saying 'bird in the hand, bird in the hand!!' in other words, we have to look at what we have instead of searching the bushes hoping for better. It's a lesson I've learned as I go on in life.

Little bit of wisdom for ya, you're welcome.

Other than all that I can tell you truly that I don't want to read ANY book EXCEPT for Kiss of Snow by Nalini Singh.

There.

I admitted my mental block. It's like I can't really concentrate on another story because it's not the one I want. So instead of forcing anything I'm sitting idly by and reading reviews and building up my shopping cart at Chapters.

On a completely different note:

Two nights ago I discovered Pixie (how dare you invade my personal space!) and Twilight (a little love never hurt anyone!) curled up with each other on the bed while Bob was sleeping. Did I get the picture evidence? I did, but it's on my video cam and I haven't downloaded anything from it yet.

So yes, the adventures of C-Rex and Bob will soon hit high gear. Until then, hardwood floors need to go down on the main floor, a coffered ceiling needs to be built in the dining room, the fireplace is currently getting painted and touch ups everywhere need to be dealt with. I'll get there yet!

Happy reading! Hope you are reading something that is really working for you!

This and That

2011-03-14T02:21:00.003-04:00

I'm still alive and all. I have to say that I'm fully into cabin fever and it's not pretty. I think I'm fighting some depression but the good news is the exercise room is now all up and running so for the past few days the exercise has helped with my mood.

I'm stunned as I know most people are about what is going on in Japan. I just hope and pray that those who are in need get help now. It does make you feel powerless for sure - at least it does for me as I can do nothing for them except donate money. I do find comfort in the fact that Japan has training for these kind of natural disasters - I just don't think they expect everything to happen all at once.

In other news, I have not seen my baby cousin and I'm getting all antsy.

In even other news my husband is getting shell shocked by the price of things.

See, he had a job. And we had a paycheck and we also had a company car. Gas, insurance and well, the cost of things Bob wanted did not really enter his world view. Afterall, he was well paid and hey, he works hard so why not get a chocolate chip cake for later that night.

For the past week I have heard about how much is costs to drive to places.

Yeah, I know. I used to drive everywhere for my job but I was reimbursed mileage but hey, I was always aware of how much money went in the tank and most people have to know that. Bob has never really had to factor that in and now it's all 'it's going to cost us 30 bucks to go see my family!'

Then he wanted that chocolate chip cake I had mentioned earlier and holy cow, it's 5.99! 'Did you know this cake was that much!?' I get asked. Truly, I don't know that I ever really looked as again, job, finances, things were fine - now I'm looking at him and wondering if this new crabby Bob is worth 5.99 (just kidding).

What's funny is Bob thinks I spend most of our money and hey, I never really cared because really, I didn't. Now I look at him and say 'who spends all our money now?' and I think Bob is coming to the conclusion that 200 bucks at Home Depot is 2 weeks of gas money.

He told me I wasn't allowed to buy books anymore. I laughed and said I still have 200 bucks in gift cards to which his answer was 'crap!! I used all my gift cards.'

There's a whole lot of other stuff going on that I have to bite my tongue about but he does get C-Rex grilling him every few days and he's not used to that. He has started a Sales Agency with 2 partners and I so hope these guys can make a great go of it. I know they can, they just need to get enough clients going.

Anyways, he was offered something this past week and he's thinking it over. Of course, me being the biggest and best proponent of all things Bob (seriously, I think he's a genius and if he would only hire me as an agent we'd be rich in a few years. Or not because C-Rex can be off-putting) - I felt he needed some reality thrown in like cost of benefits (we use 'em!), cost of gas/mileage, wear and tear on a vehicle etc. These are things a company that hires Bob would have to come up with so in this new company he needs to ask the right amount of compensation to take care of all those things.

But, what do I know. I just know I pray and bide our time with full faith in Bob as long as he remembers his value and doesn't undervalue his work. (yes, we had that discussion and C-Rex almost bit him)

Anyways, that's the pile of ugh we have over here - I hope you guys are all holding strong and finding lots of leisure time and I don't know about you guys but I can't wait for the spring!

Dream of a Dark Warrior by Kresley Cole

2011-03-04T00:06:00.000-05:00

Finally! A title that might actually help me remember the characters and plot of the book.

Dreams actually play into the story so hopefully that stays with me but then, with my memory, who knows.

Cindy Blurb: We meet Regin the Radiant (A Valkryie) a thousand years ago plus another 9 or so when she first leaves Valhalla (Heaven) and is still a child of 10 years. She has no real fear of anything but does need food and a horse cause she is still a mortal and hunger does not keep itself at bay.

She enters a Berzerkers place (think Vikings with super rage) to find Aidan, the leader to ask for help. Aidan, upon seeing her knows she is his but also knows she is too young. So he hies her off to his cottage to feed her and keep her safe for the night before sending her to live with family until she is of the age they can be together. I'm thinking Aidan is like 40 at this time. Regin thinks he's a touch crazed but he listens to her and laughs with her when most people find her a pain in the arse. Doesn't matter though, she leaves in the night and for the next 9 years Aidan does nothing but try and find her.

Finally they are together and Regin still finds him fun and charming but hey, he's a mortal and she has no interest in sticking around to see him grow old and die. So Aidan says he will gain immortality by fighting 200 battles in the name of Woden (her Father) and will not anger the gods by taking her virginity. But they still have lots of fun. Until the night he can't help himself and afterwards is killed. His dying words are how he'll find Regin again.

Fast forward a thousand years and Regin is now the prisoner of Declan Chase, an evil man with the soul purpose of destroying all things Lore or immortal or of another species that is not human. He is the right hand man of a huge operation and has hunted and killed many of the lore.

Only Regin knows he the reincarnation of Aidan and with one kiss and a night of bliss she hopes she can save herself and her allies.

But with all things lately, it's complicated.

I have to admit I have a few left over questions about how everything worked and worked out. I mean, the idea of reincarnation is not really explained as to how or why it happens. In previous books Cole usually has logical reasons why something odd in the lore might happen. This time the reincarnation part wasn't really explained.

With that said, I have to say the story has stayed with me. I love dark tortured characters and Declan was definitely all that. In fact, he is considered the greatest enemy of many of the lore when they discover he exists along with The Order (a human group experimenting on miscreats (miscreations) to find the weakness so humans can exterminate them). I also like how even at the end of the story he wasn't all sunshine and happiness about the lore. I mean, how do you go from hating and fighting for over 20 years of your life and then just flip a switch. You don't and Declan really can't.

Regin meanwhile is fun and mouthy and hey, I enjoy that. She has a way of egging on her enemies and being somewhat inappropriate but you never have to wonder where you stand with her.

What Regin didn't expect was the man who had harmed her and tortured her could be her reincarnated lover Aidan. Afterall, other reincarnations had never tried to hurt her. Declan has her and many of her allies and greatest enemies all imprisoned and she realizes her only hope is to get Declan to remember his past lives with her.

But there's a catch and you'll have to read the book to find it. At least, I think you do, I don't think it's mentioned in the blurb and probably not in the first couple of chapters either.

I do have to say that there was a part of this story that didn't work for me and that was the 'mine' aspect which has worked for me in the past. The only problem is yelling 'mine!' out while making love it not overly romantic to me. Easily fixed with the addition 'you're' but just 'mine' and I'm wondering if it's the vagina he's claiming and the rest of the body parts are just there for the ride. Okay, yes, I may be pulling at fine strings but for some reason with this book I really, really noticed the use of this word and have to say it was off putting.

I don't want to go into spoiler territory so if you're going to read the book you might want to skip this paragraph just in case. I found the previous incarnations of Aidan to be obsessed with Regin and not really in love with her and Regin never really fell in love with them. Declan meanwhile has so much to over come that he doesn't come off as obsessed but more curious and needing. I think the separation of Aidan from Declan would have been complete if Declan had never used the same terminology as Aidan and claimed all of Regin without yelling 'mine'. Cause really, 2 year old kids run around yelling 'mine' all the time and even they aren't cute when doing it.

Once again, there is a meeting of many of the previous lovers and friends near the end and Nix is hanging about (but I can't see her as a pretty young woman - I see her as an old hag kind of thing) and I couldn't really tell who's story would be next which is kind of cool.

I'm going with a B- because I enjoyed Regin and her sense of humour and her ways and I really did like the dark Declan Chase. I guess the ending just didn't work out quite right for me (and it had more to do with changes in Declan than to plotting) so it's not really a keeper but then, I'm keeping the book - just in case!

Finding Normal

2011-03-01T00:24:00.002-05:00

Bob's job officially ended on Friday and as much as I am feeling off kilter, Bob seems to be thrilled. Until I got up this afternoon and he looked me dead in the eye and said, 'I'm bored'.

*shrug* I'm guessing the next few months are going to be interesting to say the least.

For the past 5 days I have been a day walker because Bob is hand nailing the hardwood floor in the master bedroom.

Hand. Nailing.

This takes serious time and well, Bob's not been slaving away up there. Not that I blame him, it's a huge undertaking but he seems quite happy with doing it all by hand. No huge mallet hammer to get things moving. I've decided this is his 'coping' with not being employed. Bob thinks I'm bonkers. But hey, I just notice patterns is all. Whenever something 'big' happens Bob loses himself in a project.

And the floors are the Mother of all projects.

Ah well, we'll figure it out. I just told him that I'll be back to my nocturnal ways soon and that I didn't want to hear it. He nodded and said that I had indeed been a trooper. Yeah I have!

All I know is my 'space' is being all ruched up. Bob 12/7 is a lot of Bob. I love him but I need my 'me' time or I get lippy. We just need to find out sea legs is all.

Finally I went to buy the Kindle only guess what? My gift card is only good for the Canadian Amazon so whenever I switch to buy the Kindle it doesn't recognize that I have funds on the account. So it would be 170 bucks right now and I'm not feeling all that jazzed about the future to be plopping down that coin at the moment. Bob has insisted but I've held steady. He did say he would order it himself but I laughed cause I'm pretty sure Bob knows how to find the news on the internet and then after that, the computer is a huge chess board or solitaire.

But hey, my birthday is in August and I'm pretty sure I know what I'm asking for!

And onto reading, I finished Dream of a Dark Warrior by Kresley Cole tonight. I'm working out my opinion piece but it's slow going.

Kindle? Nook? iPad?

2011-02-18T01:17:00.003-05:00

I was sure I was going to be the last one to ever buy an e-reader and from what I've seen of blog reviews lately I truly am.

Once I heard about the Kindle upgrades and that it was wireless I was intrigued. But the price was too much and hey, Canadian so not great.

Then all hell broke loose and lots of readers kept coming and things just kept getting better and better. Including availability and pricing.

I was just getting ready to take the leap when Nook came out in color.

Like, wow. That is snazzy and I'm thinking the Kindle will have to respond at some time but tonight I got all itchy and went looking at the pros and cons from their ads.

Basically the Kindle is light, holds battery life longer than any other gadget I have in the house and that matte looking screen looks like it's perfect for reading.

The Nook colour meanwhile has some of the same stuff but the battery life is only 8 hours (and that's how long it can take me to read a book I've been all agog for for months and I couldn't imagine my wrath if the battery died 30 pages before the end of the book)

BUT, I love the option of sharing books with friends. Now that's the best feature I've seen yet. It doesn't go into how that works (cause I imagine there's some catch) but for an extra 100 bucks, if I can share books with Nath and Ames and Kristie and Amy and everyone else well, wouldn't we all save some serious cash?

And I think you can go online with it. Which is nuts cause that feels even bigger than just a reader.

As to the iPad - until tablets come way down to earth in price I'm not buying. I've heard there are some great upgrades coming so I'm waiting. An electronic that you can only read on seems like a bit of a waste if you can get something that you can read, surf the net and do your taxes on.

All that to say I'm still in the bushes. Waiting for the right time but boy, all those reviews of romances I can't buy because they are e-pubbed? Yeah, yeah, I can read on my computer.

No. Thanks.

Brain Wrecked

2011-02-16T02:38:00.002-05:00

I got me some blues right now. I went to see the new baby and I think I have some baby blues happening. Ah well, they grow up and get all whiny and stuff so I keep telling myself I'm fine.

As to life in general - busier.

Last week we were out every night and that doesn't usually work for me. The good news is I'm careful about the anxiety pills now so I'm good stead on that front. Now I just need to get some exercise but lazy keeps winning the day.

Great news about being so busy is that Kresley Cole's latest book is at my local bookstore and I didn't find out until midnight tonight. Which is good and yet not because I can't get into the bookstore. Bad Bookstore.

And then I'm going to have another job. We'll see how long it lasts. I'm basically going to be Bob's company's Girl Friday. With lots of attitude. So I'll probably get fired just when it goes from volunteer to getting paid. Yeah, that's the way it goes sometimes.

So I'll be very busy doing up invoices, payroll and taxes and stuff. Bob's getting pushy already but they haven't even bought the program I would need to get started. Men.

There are so many things just juggling around for attention and I don't know where to steady my gaze so I'm guessing this will be me for a while.

All stunned and wishy-washy.

He's Here!

2011-02-09T03:15:00.003-05:00

Gorgeous Cousin gave birth to a Baby Boy Benjamin at about 11:30pm on Feb 8th, 2011!

My plan is to go tomorrow around 5 or 6pm to see the little guy. Of course, we haven't heard the weight or anything but Aunt Nora said he was a big boy. I'm thinking close to 8 pounds.

Mom and baby are doing very well last we heard which means all the sugars are okay. Phew!

Other than that I'm sitting here trying to see if I can find the last few minutes of Glee from the Superbowl but nothing is online for us Canadians. Sucks! Apparently there was a kiss and I'm not sure how it all ended because it was a few minutes behind in taping.

Now Bob is up and sitting in his chair eating shredded wheat. I was only going to be on the computer for a few minutes before heading back up to watch TV. Ah well. Guess I'll cruise around the net for a while.

Just a Quickie

2011-02-07T03:19:00.003-05:00

Hey, it's early Monday morning and I just finished ballots for the AAR poll *phew* and am about to start my wind down phase of the evening.

I've declared tomorrow Cindy Day which means next to nothing nowadays except - DO NOT WAKE ME!!

Then we'll see where the day takes me after that.

But this is a quick check in because this is the week!!

My Gorgeous Cousin is due on Tuesday so with much love, luck and prayer there will be a new addition to our oddly not nuclear family (My Aunt and Cousin are an extension of the 4 in my family - GC is just as much a baby sister as a cousin and I've told my Aunt she's the mother I didn't have (and yes, she laughed because she totally 'got it'). I'm very excited while having a few pangs of jealousy.

I mean, I chose not to do extreme measures to get pregnant and Bob and I went to an adoption meeting in the city that scared the beejeesus out of us! And really, I'm living the life.

No really, my mom is right when she says I live a charmed life. But there will always be a part of me that will miss or mourn the notion that I didn't have children. I grieved very hard from about year 3 to 5 of our marriage.

That said, I made a choice to be happy and I do believe happiness is a choice. This is not true if you suffer from depression - that is something completely different and I've been there. But making a choice to look at your life as full instead of complaining about all that you don't have.

I think what adds to my sadness is that my brother also did not have children biologically (he is with a wonderful woman who has 2 kids but the kids don't think of us as family and you have to respect that - no Aunt Cindy from those two and no Gram or Gramps for my parents)

So basically this little baby is coming to a bunch of adults that are so ready to see a newbie in the family.

And I'm thinking we'll be fighting over him for months to come!

I'll try and check in later in the week. Have fun reading!

February Is Now

2011-02-02T20:15:00.004-05:00

I'm busy entering ballots for the 2010 AAR Annual Reader's Poll so I've been a touch busier on the computer than usual. It ends this Sunday at midnight so head on over if you feel like entering a ballot.

Then it will be a bit busy as we do up the results. This will be mixed in with the arrival of a baby for Gorgeous Cousin! My brain hasn't even processed it yet but I am very excited.

As to other things in life, Bob is now working from home so we're kind of in each others grill at all times. I remember this from years ago when Bob switched to working from home. There is an adjustment period but I feel like we're much more ready for it than the last time. So at the moment, he is still working for the company that has let him go on contract. The contract goes from week to week and I'm thinking this Friday might be his last day but we'll just have to wait and see.

After that, Bob has some irons in the fire. He has so many ideas I just have to wait and see where his Aries brain lands. My Virgo will just have to deal.

One thing though is Bob gets house bound much like I do. The problem is he wants to leave the house right when I get up. I remember this from the last time also. I get up, showered, dressed and out the door in about 1/2 hour. I think it'll be better for me as for the past few months I've been having a hard time getting out of bed. We were ready to get out tonight but my stomach was giving me the gears. Not sure if it's anxiety or just a bug like thingie. Who knows. I just knew going out tonight was not on my game plan.

The other night I did make him spend some quality time at Chapters.

I bought 2 books which was more than I thought I would pick up.

And they are from authors I have not read before. It was nice to browse and read the blurbs without feeling like I had to get out of the store.

Nightshade by Michelle Rowen - I think I was just picking up books and opened the book to read the scene that is normally written in the front of the book. Basically, some biting and fighting between what I'm guessing are the H/H and I was in. I'm hoping dark and dreamy the way I like 'em.

And Ms. Rowen has quite a backlist. Here's hoping this one is a hit!

Kiss At Your Own Risk by Stephanie Rowe - this one I picked up because I'm sure I have read one of her books and really enjoyed it. A pissed off hero and a woman who has accidentally killed a few people she loved and yeah, I'm there.

Brilliantly it was the copyright dates that got me to buy these two books.

2011.

Awesome. I can start me some early reading!

Also, I canceled those pre-orders from Amazon and can now put them under the one with gift certificate. As long as I don't make the same mistake!

Flying Monkeys and Karma

2011-01-25T01:44:00.005-05:00

Remember the books I ordered from Amazon.ca a few weeks back?

Remember I did so because I had a gift card from Amazon?

Uh, yeah. I used the wrong account when I bought the books and uh, it was not a small amount of money I used.

I'm almost afraid to do anything with Amazon at the moment because my brain doesn't seem to function properly when I'm at the site. And I'm keenly aware of having more than one account because I've made a similar mistake in the past.

How did I get 2 accounts at Amazon?

Probably forgot a password and then opened another account and voila, I have 2 accounts. One has the GC and one didn't.

Now, I know why I screwed up because seriously, I could see that the GC was being applied to the order.

Thing is, I have Air Miles.

I know, I don't fly and don't plan to, like, ever but you can get a ton of stuff with Air Miles, one of which is grocery money and hey, free food is a great thing if you have a grand dinner to do up. We usually save the money for Christmas time because who isn't broke over Christmas but we held on this year and we'll use it the next time we host something.

Like seriously, I can get about 180 bucks in grocery money in one year for doing nothing other than carry a card around with me.

Anyways, I filled up my cart and remembered that I needed to log in through airmiles.ca to get my miles. So yeah, I had to go to airmiles.ca to put in my account number which of course, I don't know by heart so I had to get off my duff and find my purse, thumb through all my cards (don't ask) and then click on the Amazon site to get back to where I was.

Here's the rub. If I logged in to the other account how did I still have stuff in my cart?

Now see, that's confusing. Should have been a red flag for me or something.

So that last order, where I ordered 3 books I already owned, returned them sucking 10 bucks off my refund for shipping because it was my fault AND now having a charge on my Credit Card that I wasn't expecting. Well, that's feeling a little like Karma kicking my ass about something.

Now, you might suggest I walk it off and normally I would agree.

But, uh, I pre-ordered 3 very important books that I can't have Flying Monkeys or Karma messing around with.

So I'm a wee bit worried about the 4th shoe but I keep reminding myself that bad things happen in 3's.

Which means I've reset the clock to have another 3 Bad Things!!!

Off to breathe in a bag.

Lazy Sunday

2011-01-23T15:39:00.004-05:00

It's a lazy Sunday afternoon here.

<--- Twilight sleeping face down on Bob's legs - definition of lazy day!

I've been up since 7am and went out to breakfast with Bob - much to his delight. (I'm usually awake when Bob has to get up for work and almost every other day lately he's yelled out from the bed 'wanna go to breakfast?' - and my reply is 'uh, no, I'm going to bed!'). So he was thrilled when I woke up beside him and said 'wanna go to breakfast?'.

It's almost 4pm now and I can safely say I'm bored. And funny enough, Bob's been napping for 2 hours. My joke is that when I'm awake Bob has to sleep to fuel me and when he's up, I have to be asleep to fuel him.

I haven't been feeling great this past week. I'm thinking a lack of organization with my anxiety pills has caused some bad reactions causing me to fall into a depression. Either that or the SAD has hit me early this year.

Also, it is very cold outside right now. Today it's minus 16 centigrade. Which is bloody cold. We were going to see if my parents were around to play a game but they weren't so Bob fell asleep and I'm just playing away for a bit. Add a series finale that set me off on a crying jag and a few other movies that seemed to hit my 'sad' button and I was a wreck yesterday. Poor Bob.

All that said, life is about to get busy.

Next weekend is Gorgeous Cousin's baby shower and then the weekend after that is former BF 50th B-day party and on that Monday I believe my Gorgeous Cousin will be giving birth. (Being a high risk pregnancy, they will probably have to do a C-Section because the risk of still birth is extremely high in the last 2 weeks of pregnancy - so they go in early to take the baby out).

And then I imagine I'll be all about the baby. You know, till it can walk, then they can have the babe back!

On a completely unrelated note but kind of similar AAR's Annual Reader Poll for 2010 will begin tomorrow. So for the next 2 weeks I'll also be busy counting the ballots and then another week doing up the finals and stuff.

So maybe I should be grateful for this lazy Sunday and just relax into it and enjoy. Cause really, how many of these do I normally get?

Normal? Really?

2011-01-17T04:20:00.004-05:00

I swear, just as I get a handle on how much of a mad house we live in, the hubby shows me what it's really like.

Yep, he must have heard me rambling last night in his sleep and his sub-conscious woke him up and forced him to get a move on.

The Beginnings of Normalcy:

Caveat: The floor is not yet nailed down, so he will have to move the furniture all again - although probably not right out of the room but I did have a WTF moment when B-Rex was huffing about needing to get the bed moved back into the master bedroom. And in case I didn't know, I was told 'he worked his bag off' today. Classy. Which is why I know B-Rex was imminent and it was time to be the doting wife.

See, I can be a team player.

Reno Hell? Nothing like mine!

2011-01-16T02:42:00.005-05:00

I just caught the tail end of some show where a newly married couple get to buy a house and then have a decorator and builder guy renovate the entire thing. Sure, they have a budget but I'm thinking they have landed a plum gig.

Until I hear the words 'I'm not sure how we'll live her and renovate at the same time - that would be reno hell'.

Uh, you people don't know what reno hell is.

Exhibit A: I watched the video and started laughing before the baseboard segment because it was like 'oh, oh, I can show you something!!'

Bob's trying to wait me out with the grout on the wall - he believes I will eventually see the light and realize he was right all along. Uh, no.

And then Exhibit B: Please note I was out of breath a bit in this video as I ran up the stairs (okay, not sure that's true) and I was rushing because I was getting the 'battery is going to blow' any second sign. So not as much lingering.

I didn't get to the master bathroom which is literally studs and a shower pan (which we will tile) and a working toilet. That dresser you see in the master bedroom under the TV is going to be my custom made vanity for the bathroom. I'll be sure to take some reno shots.

And as to cleanliness in our house? I washed our floors about a month ago (I'm talking on my hands and knees) and the next day - THE NEXT DAY! - Bob walked through with muddy boots. When I did my theatrical gasp - this means very loud noise that makes Bob jump and say 'what, what happened' - he told me he'd clean it up no worries. I purposely did not go near the kitchen cabinets as the kick have dirt all over them.

So I'm a bit of a slouch when it comes to cleaning right now.

And C2 - I thought you idea of a dust colour was spot on. The paint colour is call something clay. For me, if they weren't going to be white, they sure as hell weren't going to be dirty white. So instead, a gray/taupe.

I'll take more pics and stuff as I go.

Oh, and this will be why I won't be around much this week. That library is getting it's paint job lickety-split!

Books!! cough

2011-01-12T02:53:00.009-05:00

First, the background may change daily at this point. At the wicked age of 40 I now find all those things I loved burning holes into my retinas and that orange fun was hurting. So I go to pick another background and oooops, it's still orange and bossy. But obviously orange is on the brain so we'll see if it lasts more than a day.

Let's talk about the books I have ordered!!

Uh oh. Uh, something is not right here. I already have the cover images downloaded which means....I've probably already bought these books!!! ZOMG!!

Okay, maybe, just maybe I was planning this post and pre-loaded the cover art. I mean, that's what normal people might do...but I'm so not normal and the idea that I would be that organized is laughable.

BAH.

HA.

HA.

Yeah, that's my sarcastic laugh that means I'm a total nut job and I'm about to find out what Amazon Canada's return policy is like.

Shit!

Oh, but about the books.

I really want to read them. So bad, I've probably managed to order 2 sets now.

*shake it off*

ZOMG!!!

Which means I also have the other book I ordered!!

How in the world!?

Gah!

I knew there was something wrong. I knew it, but did I listen to that little voice in the back of my brain. Of course not because it's normally a wack a do!

I need chocolate.

Bloody hell.

See, I pre-load my cart with books I want to buy. Only I normally buy from Chapters but I got an Amazon gift certificate and now I realize I didn't empty the cart, thinking it was a wishlist instead of realizing that a few months ago I probably ordered the books from Chapters.

I said Bloody Hell already, right.

So that's three books that are going back.

*mental shake*

Okay, we can save this.

Surrender to An Irish Warrior - this book was reviewed by Super Librarian Wendy who also put it on her top 10 for 2010 and it's dark. Like super dark and I like dark so I just had to order the book.

Now, I don't really like people on covers but this guy is wicked hot. Clean shaven with just enough muscle.

*cough*

That was more about me than the book.

Moving on!

The Iron Duke by Meljean Brook

People are having kittens over this book and I have to see what it's all about. Made jmc's top 10 list (maybe it was more) for 2010 and I haven't heard one bad word against it so I'm in.

If someone here has read this book and it's more Urban Fantasy than romance please do let me know. I can deal, I just need to know going in.

Which means I haven't read the reviews because I knew I was going to buy this book. Again, the way my brain works is ...

terrifying.

And finally Scoundrel's Kiss by Carrie Lofty. Another Super Librarian pick that sounded just quirky enough to have me sit up and notice.

Thing is, we've talked about how I need to branch my reading out and that's what I'm trying to do with this pick. I need new 'auto-buy' authors so I'm out to try a whole new pack of peeps.

We'll see how long that lasts.

And with this order I pre-ordered 3 books. I'm not sure why I did it but I thought, why not, give it a try.

Raziel by Kristina Douglas
Dreams of a Dark Warrior by Kresley Cole (auto-buy author)
Kiss of Snow by Nalini Singh (super squeeeee) it's Hawke's book and I can't wait but it's not out until the last day of May.

All right, off to see if I really do own those 3 books I talked about earlier.

Nobody mention this to Bob.

Debris

2011-01-11T01:32:00.003-05:00

I wanted something way out there as a background. I mean, if I think cream is ucky then the last backdrop was just wrong. But it had a bed in it and I'm so a bed person. Ah well, sunshiny orange and yellow and flirty circles are fun and I want fun.

I have started back on the treadmill - I'm doing 1/2 hour walks and I know I can do better but my stress gut is giving me the gears and at about the 25 minute mark it lets it be known that I need to take a break. Gut trumps everything so yeah, it's winning. I'm hopeful that with more walking the gut will also relax.

A subtle cream for the bookcases has been ruled out. I went to the dreaded home depot and picked out some colours that all looked great in the store and on the chips. On the bookcases, wall and trim it all looks the same. No contrast and I'm a contrast kind of woman. That said, I think the bookcases can be a subtle gray that I picked tonight for the wall. So now a dramatic wall color might be needed. Or the entire room will be the subtle gray - but Bob also loves contrast so I see him putting up a fuss.

The man needs a job.

Just saying. I'm worried that he's kind of looking for himself and everything he's thrown out as possible things to do has me wondering if there isn't a scary Hippy side to Bob. That said, I figure the first month he has no money to do anything and I mean, not even buy a nail kind of anything, he'll screw his head back on. Or I'll screw it back on. Might be I need to figure out what I want to do when I grow up. Yikes!

My kitty Pixie doesn't seem to like me anymore. I'm not sure what's up there. Bob says she sleeps with me every day but hey, I'm sleeping so I don't know she's there. She doesn't come out to sit with me at night like she used to and tonight I found her under the bed. I told Bob I'm going to find some catnip and roll around in it and see if I can't find that 'lovin' feelin' from her again. Although I wonder what she thinks. One day Emma her biggest, bestest friend was here and then she was gone and the Shit Disturber showed up.

And finally, I told my gorgeous cousin I was going to throw a baby shower for her. I told her this in September. She told me one of her friends would probably want to help. Uh, yeah, this friend booked a hall and sent out invites. Tomorrow night my Equally Gorgeous Aunt, Gorgeous Cousin (who is somehow also involved in the party planning) and this friend and I are supposed to get together to hash out the details. *sigh* At this point just tell me what to bring and I'm good. So I'm going to sit and keep my mouth shut - Bob will be there to help me with that if I start to talk. I really am a laid back person but for some reason, the friend sending out the invites has kind of tweaked my nose a bit. I did call Gorgeous Cousin and told her that I didn't need to be involved at all (there are 4 people creating this party now?) and she was all 'no, no, we need you.' But then she takes after me and is a people pleaser too.

Tomorrow night I'll share my recent book buys with you - I used up one gift card and I'm so squee happy about my choices.

Now, to figure out what I'm going to buy with the rest of my gift cards!

Great Expectations

2011-01-10T02:45:00.002-05:00

I decided to title this one after a book. Why? Because I had some seriously high expectations of what was coming for me in January.

Time to read.

Well, scratch that off the list of 'happily to do' because I'll be painting for probably the next few weeks. And then there is the AAR Annual Reader's Poll (ooops, my bad, wasn't really thinking clearly) a baby shower for my Gorgeous Cousin, my mother's birthday, my BF(but not really)'s 50th Birthday party - oh yeah! And then Gorgeous Cousin has the baby I've been waiting on - but that's the first weekend in February.

I mean you guys know me and I'm not only nocturnal but I like to hibernate in the winter months and it's so not going to happen. Bah.

Great news is that Bob and I picked a flooring and we're still married!

Bad news is Bob's well laid plans are way, way, way off and now we're scrambling with tearing up flooring (mostly Bob cause well, I'm sleeping and doing AAR stuff). This will be followed by my finally painting my library room and the bookcases that I've left natural maple for a long time.

This means boxing up all my books *deep breath in* and moving them out while picking a colour for the bookcases because Bob thinks 'pure white' will be too glaring. This is giving me heart palpitations because his suggestion was to paint them cream.

Cream is dirty white.

That's how my crazy brain interprets cream so yeah, melt down of the new year happened and Bob got blasted. He's totally messing with C-Rex.

*letting breath out*

Oh well, I'm getting thrown into the land of the living and being forced to make decisions (I don't like to make permanent decisions dammit!) and life is about to get hectic.

Even so I'm hanging around checking out your blogs and keeping up with what you are all doing.

So, as I have said to Bob many times when I'm all up and bouncy - 'Entertain me!'

Hardwood Floors

2011-01-07T00:45:00.002-05:00

I'm titling this puppy after what it is about. So you don't get all sucked into something you think would be cool and get ripped off by me whining about hardwood floors.

So I'll begin.

We have a 2 story home that is all hardwood flooring. It's that natural oak colour of olden days and can't be refinished because it's already been done and now the nail heads are showing and well, that will rip the sandpaper - and that's more than you ever wanted to know about flooring.

That sad fact is I know more.

Bob has decided that after 5 years of living in a renovation he wants hardwood floors throughout the house. Let's say the floor is 5 bucks a square foot and we have 1800 so let's just round for easy math - 10 grand.

10 grand hurts. Especially since Bob is about to not have a job and hasn't worked out what he wants to do next.

So Bob comes home crowing one night because he has found finished flooring at 1.99 a square.

Like dude, seriously.

Small problem - it's a cherry finish and too red for me. Bob's being a big butt head and getting all grumbly and saying that's the floor you love it and you know it. Uh, no.

So for a few weeks I've been 'buy it, NO, don't buy it, okay, buy it, no really buy it - holy shit, don't buy it'.

The other night I land on 'fuck it, buy it I'm so done' only to watch my fav. designer who 'ta-da' shows the viewers a sample of hardwood for a 1.99 and damn, if it's not the colour I want. At the end of the show the credits roll and I pick out the flooring name.

Only the designer didn't use the 1.99 floor so my hubby went on a wild goose chase as the store said 'yeah, Sarah 101, we have no idea what that floor was'.

So off my hubby goes again because I'm all fire and brimstone and refusing to pay more than 1.99 for the floor so 'get your ass out there and find me the colour I want'.

Tonight he gets home and I squee in delight. He has a sample of the floor I want. 1.99.

Only 800 of it is in high gloss and another 800 would be in low gloss.

I have 2 separate floors so to me, who cares high gloss down stairs, low gloss upstairs.

Except Bob is an Aries and the floors will have to 'meet' at some point (stairs) and it will drive him crazy for the rest of his life.

So I asked him why he even bothered to show me the sample.

Why!!!???

So I'm all, fuck it and he's all 'sigh' and I'm completely bamboozled by this stupid floor.

See, I don't want to look at the floor for the rest of my life and think 'it's too red' and Bob can't look at the floor and think 'it's not the right gloss'.

There's more to it all. Have you heard of V-groove? Prefinished floors now have a V-groove so when whacking them together the edges don't have to match perfectly. Only now, you have lines on your floor. And who says in 20 years that's not going to be something people frown about.

Plain hardwood floors in the 2 1/4 strip oak have been around forever and aren't going anywhere and I'm a classic whore so I want what I want.

What Bob doesn't want is to buy all unfinished and we'll finish it ourselves because that is a lot of work. Lots and lots and lots. Hell, I've done a few houses and it's a pain.

So I'm pouting and mad and sad and needless to say very unsettled about everything and just want this part of it to be over so I can settle back down and read some books and not fret that we're destroying our house and, oh yeah, we don't have money coming in anymore.

Fuck!

Phaser Set To Stun

2011-01-05T00:50:00.009-05:00

Damn.

That title makes me wish there were more sci-fi shows on TV and more films coming out (and I have no clue why they changed the short form to a bunch of letters with 'y's in them but I'm not using it). I'm not a closet sci-fi fan but I'm quiet about my love.

I'm a Trekkie even though I couldn't tell you one thing about tribbles except that they look cute, I'm a Star Wars fan of the first order but I don't do pot or wear togas with cinnamon buns strapped to my ears.

Firefly, how I miss you - Jane was perfect for Summer even though she was trying to kill him but I now know that the creator doesn't like happy endings so maybe it's best.

Battlestar Galactica I forgive you for the ending and now want to re-watch every episode with a glass of ice cooled over with coke. Happily I have the DVD collection and can do so, I just have to decide when exactly I'm going to be all fracked up and immersed in sci-fi land that talking to me would be pointless. (I'm guessing once the summer re-runs hit)

I tried Caprica but it was slow and well ssssslllllllooooooow.

Don't get me wrong, I can do bad sci-fi and be happy as a sow in fecal matter. Starship Troopers anyone? I mean all of them. All.

Oh, I do have to say I love Fringe but I missed a few episode last year and have no clue about the 'amber' on the other side and what it's about. I need the first season but do I buy it and discover the 'powers that be' have canceled another ass kicking show or just take the risk.

See, I don't buy DVD's of shows that were canceled. Hell no. The network isn't going to bring back the show but they want my money so I can enjoy only part of a story? 'Life' was such a great show (and no sci-fi - yep, train is now off the tracks) and after a season and a 1/2 they canceled it.

I blame Jay Leno and that whole NBC nightmare.

Now in that case I bought the DVD for my Dad because he was in Malaysia and didn't get the shows and I didn't think any fool was going to cancel this show. Gah. And now, do I ever want to buy the last DVD and then sit and have a 'Life' fest but it goes against my prickly nature to reward those who make stupid decisions.

Cake and eating it is the only way I'm playing the DVD game so I hope networks start listening up. I'm not buying a 'whole series' DVD when I know the show got yanked off the air so fast, the advertisers were sponsoring blank air.

I'm not sure how this hitch got in my giddie-up tonight but this is a lesson on how not to create a title for a blog not already written.

What was this blog supposed to be about?

Me and the treadmill.

Phaser set to stun.

I'll fill you in later about the treadmill and boring stuff like that.

On the book front I'm a mess because I want to read one kind of romance and don't have a clue who would write it or if I'm in a 'kink' slot and need to look into romantica but I haven't had real luck with that kind of stuff.

But then in the end, it's still angst and stuff, just a little more physical and intense.

So you know, as you were.

Happy New Year!!! And A New Decade I Think.

2011-01-01T02:24:00.003-05:00

2011.

I'm in a wee bit of shock realizing it was over 10 years ago now that everyone was so worried about Y2K - I know how we prepared. Poor Bob ate canned food for months after a glitch-less New Year. He's a conspiracy nut of the first order but I figure if he's preparing for the things I'm scared of anyways then we're all good.

I can't say I've ever thought of 2011 or any date after that as a possibility but then I haven't been able to 'see' myself after the age of 3o anyways. I used to think it meant I would die around then but then I realized we just don't have those milestones to cross after 21. It was all about becoming a teen at 13, then driving at 16, becoming an adult and able to serve booze at 18 and being legal to drink at 19. (I know in the States it's closer to 21 but I think it's still 19 up here). So really, after 19, nothing really happens at a set time so time kind of loses it's meaning.

I will now mention I took my sleepy pills because I'm thinking I'm going way to deep with this post.

Resolutions.

I hate them and I don't make them.

But there is something calling me this year. Something greater than what I've been for the past few months and it needs to be answered. Only I'm not starting today but maybe Monday or later in the week. I'll get there, I'm just not making it a pressure point that 'has' to happen today.

Today I think we should still celebrate. Monday is soon enough for change.

Love, Christmas, Recipes and Books

2010-12-20T21:22:00.002-05:00

Yeah, that title leaves a lot to be desired but I'm thinking this is going to be one of those posts that goes every where and no where all at once.

It's now 5 days till Christmas and I'm amazingly not stressed. See, this year Bob made some off the cuff comment about how Christmas shopping is so easy. Let's just say I lost it and he was all 'what, make me a list and I'll do all the shopping'. Deciding to take him at his word I made up a list of people we needed gifts for - eg. Buy Dad 2 gifts - about 30 bucks each.

He had it all done in one weekend and he had a blast doing it.

I was floored and pleased all at once because he did a great job and hey, I don't have to go out and stress over gifts. (I had already bought the 'big' gifts for the family so it was those odd gifts that I needed)

I have also wrapped almost all the presents!

I have only Bob's gifts to wrap and FINALLY last night my writer's block loosened it's grip on my brain and I was able to write up my hopes for Bob in the coming year. This is the gift I was talking about earlier. I tell you, I was having such an awful time trying to get anything into words. Last night inspiration hit while I was watching some lame show and I grabbed the first piece of paper to my left and started writing until I thought I was done. Now I can leave it for a few days and then tweak it before deciding it's right.

The good news is that I should be able to figure out the size the writing part will take up and I'll be able to do the 'art' part over the next few nights.

With all my free time - I want to read and really, I want to buy lots of books. I found my gift card from my birthday - I figured I had used it but it ended up being in a pocket of my purse I rarely use. Duh. I'm trying to work out whether I'll order online or go to the store. Haven't quite decided.

Finally, my family now tries to make it easier for the host by having everyone bring a few dishes. So I'm doing broccoli and cauliflower with cheese AND a broccoli casserole for my SIL (that part is a surprise so we'll see if anyone touches it - SIL won't eat stuffing from inside the bird so this casserole covers both stuffing and broccoli), parsnips (my dad's fav veg but one my mom refuses to make - I like 'em too so I'm bringing 'em) and I know there is something else but it's on the list upstairs and I'm not moving at the moment.

That's is from this part of the world, hope you are having a great time and if you are celebrating I hope you are not in the middle of Stress-mas.

A Special Gift For My Hubby

2010-12-10T05:10:00.006-05:00

I don't believe I mentioned it here on the blog but over the past several months Bob has known that his job of 13 years was pretty much done. I have to say that the company Bob worked for was very good to it's employees and it's a bit sad that Bob will have to leave.

That said, Bob will continue to work for the next few months as a 'contract employee' to help wind the business down or to help it gear back up if there is a buyer.

I'm very proud of my husband (as I'm sure most wives are) and I know that he will get a job fairly fast if that is what he wants. He has already thought of a few things he would like to do once this job winds down.

I'm surprised and happy for him that he doesn't seem depressed or overly upset about this. I had told him many times before we got the final news that he had done everything in his power to keep the company going. There is no shame in what has happened - at least not on Bob's head. Now, I think there should be a few executives who should be hanging their heads in shame but then, these are people looking out for their best interests instead of looking at the economy and the need for people to make a living.

Bob's whole philosophy was about saving the business (about 180 jobs). He knew it could be done but it's hard to run a business when the 'parent' companies show no interest in it and you have a board overseeing the project that can't really work together.

Anyways, it's happened and there is nothing to be done.

So Bob's Christmas gift this year will be more along the lines of silly but you know what, these are the type of gifts Bob always remembers.

I have decided to write up something for him about how we're in this together and that he has a partner that will follow where ever he leads. I found a scrapbook frame and will use scrapbook papers to make a nice piece of 'manly' art. (Seriously, scrapbooking needs to take men into account.) And it will probably be the least expensive gift I give him this year. But I have a feeling it will mean the most and it's during the rough times, even though I say it every day, to let the ones you love know what they mean to you.

If you need an idea because of cut backs with money but aren't sure a scrapbooked art piece will work for someone, then I have other ideas that are fairly cheap and say 'I know you'.

Eg. I had a friend who was an actress (still is) and I knew her favourite soliloquy from Shakespeare. I found a frame (at like Home Sense (very inexpensive but great quality) and printed out the soliloquy on pretty paper and framed it for her.

My cousin is also really good with gifts. The year her mother was to retire she took some plain journals and got letter stickers and made up a journal for finance, a journal for adventure and another one I can't remember - it was all in a pretty cardboard suitcase (again, cheap at Homesense) and I thought it was a fabulous idea.

The only caution I can make is know your audience. My mother would clock me with a gift like that - or of course, make it a running joke that we all have a great time laughing about. No seriously, there was this gift I did and it was horrendous and we laughed and laughed and laughed. So even though it was funny, it wasn't exactly a gift my mother loved because hey, she likes particular things and my arts and crafts stuff just ain't it.

So good luck with your shopping (I'm almost done - I need to buy Bob a few more 'real' gifts) and if you decide to do something a little more crafty I would love to hear about it.

As it is, I may be missing for a few days as I struggle to come up with something 'perfect' to write for the man I love.

Top 100 - More like Sixty Something

2010-12-08T19:22:00.001-05:00

First things first, I have already looked at my submitted list and thought 'wtf!?'. I think that's probably quite common when an avid reader is asked to rank their favourite romances of all time. There are always titles missed, some I think I got wrong and of course, the day of the week can change everything.

I will put little blurbs here and there for some of the books - cause I'm kind of lazy and yet I'm feeling chatty.

Here's what I know for sure, there are more than a few titles on this list that need to have a re-read cause even though I can look at the rating I may have posted for a book, I remember next to nothing about it. Also, there are only a few books that I remember parts of but have no clue who wrote them or what the title of the book was. Sad really.

That said, here is the list I submitted:

1. Lord of Danger Anne Stuart

Historical Romance

I can't wait for this book to get a new cover. I love the colour purple and all, but this cover needs some new life!

The hero is Simon and he's a con man from way back but he falls so hard for his new plain wife that you can't help but fall in love with him. There is a scene in this book that gives me the tummy dip and it's awesome. Obviously my favourite Anne Stuart book and really, it's like picking your favourite cat.

2. Mr. Impossible Loretta Chase

*gasp* A new cover like this one - oh so pretty and that's a colour purple I can get behind!

I loved, loved, loved this story - if you haven't read this one yet, keep reading until they get to the Pyramids. The opening is a little dry and slow but after that this book is a keeper all the way!

3. Branded by Fire Nalini Singh

I have to say in the end, I actually liked this book with Mercy and Riley better then Judd's book (and I loved Judd). Two dominant were animals having to deal with being attracted to each other and Mercy needing to be dominant yet at the same time needing a man strong enough to equal her. Bit of a dance to get it right but great to watch these two fall in love.

4. Pleasure of a Dark Prince Kresley Cole

This book got an A+ from me and that almost never happens. It was the hero, Garreth MacRieve who completely made this book for me. I also enjoyed Lousha (Lucia) who is all broken and just really needs to believe in love. I couldn't have been happier after reading this book.

5. Fire and Ice Anne Stuart

This was the book in the series that I was sure wasn't going to work for me. Silly me for under estimating AS. This book has some elements of a classic Stuart and yet, there were allowances made for how young these characters were. They both made mistakes (refreshing to see from an AS hero as they are usually dead set in their ways) and in the end, I loved them both. In earlier books I didn't mind the heroine but the hero seemed 'off' for lack of a better word. I went into the book prepared not to like Rio but in the end, he was just too cute and sweet and so not like most AS heroes but then, he found love much younger than most of them.

6. Lover Awakened J.R. Ward

Hard to believe I'm now terrified to continue reading this series. This was Zsadist's book and it was wonderful. I do have to say that afterwards I realized just how 'hero-centric' this book was. It was Zsadist's story and his heroine was really just along for the ride.

7. Falling Angel Anne Stuart

This was one of those stories that was written before the so called 'glut' of paranormals hit the market. I would say this is a great story to read right about now. Small town, cold winter and hardship right around the corner. Loved it.

8. Time enough for Love Suzanne Brockmann

Oldie but Greatie. This is probably one of the best time travel orientated books I've read. I have seen way too many time-travel shows, movies and read my fair share of romance books that leave logistics all in the wind. Who cares about all the nitty gritty, I just needed to get these two people in the same area. Uh, no. My brain won't let it lie.

If you love Suz Brockmann and you haven't read this book - get on it. It's one of her best and I have to say half way through the story I thought 'oh shit, this is so not going to work' and yet, she made it really work. Great story all around.

9. Dream Fever Katherine Sutcliffe

First and foremost - the cover of this book is atrocious which might be why I usually get it confused with the one Sutcliffe book that I really dislike which was called Fever. Yep, you read that right, make sure you get the right book!

Historical New Zealand - anything else need to be said? Okay, how about a romance that doesn't shy away from the really, really horrible things in life. I always appreciate an author who allows for real life situations to happen. Guess what? Sometimes the knight in shining armour just doesn't get there in time. Or ever. So bad things happen and I remember liking this story because it wasn't all shiny and happy but there is a HEA so go forth and read.

10. Lover Eternal J. R. Ward - Rhage

I was surprised how charmed I was by Rhage in this story.

11. Worth Any Price Lisa Kleypas

Okay, honestly, I'm not sure I'm remembering the right book - but it was either this one or Lady Sophia's Lover that was the first Kleypas I read. I found greatness!

12. The Secret Julie Garwood

I love this romance and the relationship between 2 women who haven't seen each other in years. I also remember exactly when I read this book because it was 'the' reward after writing my last final exam for the year.

13. Kiss of a Demon King Kresley Cole

14. Moonrise Anne Stuart

15. Bet Me Jennifer Crusie

16. For My Lady’s Heart Laura Kinsale

There are parts of this story that had me stumbling - I think there is a scene where the hero rides a horse into a castle all dressed in green and to this day it's the scene that stands out in my head - cause really, dressed all in green?

It was the relationship in this story that made everything work. And I rarely read Kinsale because she makes 'me' work when I'm reading and you know I hate work.

17. Over the Edge Suzanne Brockmann

This is probably one of the only single title books by Brockmann that had me with every story line. She's famous for having three story arcs happening in a book and most of the time I want to kick something but I enjoyed all aspects of this story. And yes, Sam and Alyssa in this one were amazing. Max and Gina met and it was all about them for so long in my head.

18. Gone Too Far Suzanne Brockmann

Sam and Alyssa's book. And Max and Gina's brushing up to each other. Yum.

19. Devil in Winter Lisa Kleypas

20. Caressed by Ice Nalini Singh

The book of Judd. Yummmm. It was great but there was one mis-step that I didn't exactly enjoy. Judd is ice cold Psy and has to be in order not to kill those around him with one thought. He is in love with Brenna but even touching her causes a type of brain damage. I guess I needed something other than a 'flame out' for Judd to become one with Brenna. I love an angsty character and Judd had it. This one is going on the re-read pile for sure.

21. Slave to Sensation Nalini Singh

22. Renegade Love Katherine Sutcliffe

The romance book that started it all. I'm sure on re-read it would feel old and dusty and maybe even a bit silly but I remember it fondly and for that alone it has to be on my list.

23. Dream Man Linda Howard

I had read some Linda Howard books before this one and I was all for marking her down as an author who didn't work for me. Then this book came out and again, it was before the glut of 'paranormal' and SPLADOW I found the magic of Linda Howard. I miss her.

24. Duncan’s Bride Linda Howard

An old fashioned idea in a contemporary that Howard made work. It definitely showed the growth of a relationship and I appreciated reading a book where the hero and heroine were all in and not sure what the end result would be.

25. Ride the Fire Pamela Clare

26. Lady Sophia’s Lover Lisa Kleypas

27. Flowers from the Storm Laura Kinsale

This is one that is due for a re-read as I've only ever read this book once. But there are a few scenes that still stick with me and I do remember thinking it was one of the best romances I had ever read.

28. Morning Glory LaVyrle Spencer

I'm not sure if I would ever need to re-read this book. I have re-read it maybe 4 times since 1990 and I'm pretty sure I remember almost every scene in this wonderful story. That's very odd for me so I know this has to make my list of all time favourite romances.

29. Black Ice Anne Stuart

30. Anyone But You Jennifer Crusie

The first story I read where the heroine is older than the hero and damn, she feels every year of it. Funny story and yet, there was a lot of depth here that needed to be dealt with. Great story if you haven't read it yet.

31. No Rest For the Wicked Kresley Cole

32. The Duke and I Julia Quinn

33. Dreaming of You Lisa Kleypas

34. Twilight Memories Maggie Shayne

Hello vampire heroes!!! Yep, it was Maggie Shayne who introduced me to the vampire hero and I haven't looked back since. I have very fond memories of this trilogy and an extreme 'squeee' moment in my life at a used bookstore when I found the next title after 2 years of searching. (before internet)

35. Twilight Illusions Maggie Shayne

36. Heart Throb Suzanne Brockman

Stand alone Brockmann that was amazing and yet, I've never re-read this one. So yes, this one needs to go on the re-read list.

Side Note: what a horrible cover - luckily for her I was hooked on her books by the time this one came out.

37. Ice Blue Anne Stuart

38. Open Season Linda Howard

39. As You Desire Connie Brockway

Another book for the re-read pile. I remember loving it at the time but that's about all the memory I have - okay, a few scenes here and there but not enough to go 'hell yeah, awesome book!'

40. A Rose in Winter Kathleen E Woodiwiss

Okay, the Woodiwiss books that are listed here are nostalgia induced. I was new to romance so no, I hadn't come across the story lines that apparently are used many times by other authors.

41. Shanna Kathleen Woodiwiss

This one I need to re-read. I remember the opening scene, the whip scene and almost the ending. I'm thinking there was a lot more to the story.

42. Come Love a Stranger Kathleen Woodiwiss

Again, never having read a story that featured amnesia or the idea of twins. It was spell bounding.

43. Passion Lisa Valdez

44. Mr. Perfect Linda Howard

45. Lone Rider Lauren Bach

46. A Pocketful of Paradise Kathleen Kane

Kathleen Kane is an author I find often overlooked - probably because I don't think she's writing anymore. (I love this cover - navy blue with white daisies - very classic to me)

This book was once again before 'paranormals' - now listen up you western lovers (Kristie, I'm talking to you!) this is a western with a bit of the paranormal going on.

Unless this is the other one. Either way, I have 5 books by this author and I really want to re-read them to see if they are as great as I remember.

47. Tears of a Renegade Linda Howard

48. Come Lie with Me Linda Howard

49. The Bride Julie Garwood

You have to take yourself back to a time when bodice ripping covers were the norm. That's all you would see in that small 8' section of romance at your wee book store.

Now, look at the cover. I'm telling you, I was enamoured with the cover because it was soooo beautiful. The drapes were all golden and then the back of the wedding dress and all you can see of the hero is his hand on her back and his face where he is planting a gentle kiss on her neck.

Now take then an amplify it by a bijillion and you'll have what is between the covers of this book. In a time of 'I hate you, I love you, I hate' you kind of romances I finally found an author who made the conflict external to the H/H. You got to watch two people fall in love without misunderstandings, distrust and family drama. It was refreshing.

50. The Lion’s Lady Julie Garwood

I loved, loved, loved this romance - a man who thinks the woman he is with is a delicate flower who needs his protection. What a blow to his ego when he discovers she's more than capable of fending for herself. I adored her!

51. The Prize Julie Garwood

52. Honor’s Splendor Julie Garwood

53. My Dearest Enemy Connie Brockway

Dangit - I think I have the story line of this one and As You Desire all mixed up. Looks like Brockway is making her way onto my re-read list.

54. All Through the Night Connie Brockway

55. A Rose At Midnight Anne Stuart

56. Night Watch Suzanne Brockmann

I remember thinking there was not one bad note in this entire story. I wasn't impatient for something to happen, nothing made me want to scream - odd reason to have a book on my top 100 but again, I know I really liked this romance, I just don't remember much about it.

57. Hostage to Pleasure Nalini Singh

58. Honest Illusions Nora Roberts

This was probably the last NR I read because it about broke me. I don't do well with separations and there is one and I guess Alzheimers is brutal because there is one scene that had my shirt drenched in tears. And I don't like crying!

59. Public Secrets Nora Roberts

Another book I remember almost all the scenes - also another book that didn't shy away from horrible things happening in real life. I had read a few NR's before this and didn't really think she was a romance writer - this one made me see the light.

60. After the Night Linda Howard

61. Glass Houses Anne Stuart

Okay, I'm thinking maybe I meant Crazy As A Fox but then, maybe it was this one. A sweet Anne Stuart if you can believe it. Contemporary with no hard edges.

62. Darkling I Listen Katherine Sutcliffe

Needs to be re-read. I loved it but don't remember much of the story line at all.

63. Fairest of Them All Teresa Medeiros

I have to say I loved how dark this one got. It was on the edge of insanity dark and I loved it. I didn't see the darkness coming so it was a real surprise when it hit almost half way through the story.

64. Wildest Hearts Jayne Ann Krentz

65. Gift of Gold Jayne Ann Krentz

66. Gift of Fire Jayne Ann Krentz

67. Ritual Sins Anne Stuart

68. Ravyn’s Flight Patti O’Shea

I have read sci-fi romance before but I remember thinking this one was just really well done. Again, another read needed.

Kitten and Her Toes

2010-12-08T01:09:00.002-05:00

If you got her looking for the Advent Post click here.

If you already know me then you know to click on the video. A cat lady? Why, yes, yes I am. Those are my legs up on the desk - no wonder my back aches!

I'm working on my Top 100 post but it's slowing killing my will to live. So I'll put this one up for now and in a few days I can put up my list.

Welcome 2010 Advent Adventurers!

2010-12-01T17:22:00.016-05:00

Welcome Advent 2010 and happy 5 year anniversary! This event is hosted by Kailana from The Written World and Marg from Adventures of an Intrepid Reader and is a virtual tour of book bloggers sharing the holiday spirit.

I've participated every year so far and I have to say, this year I was wondering what I would even talk about and it was while reading my fellow Advent posters that a memory struck me from out of no where.

It's many, many years ago when I was maybe 7 or 8 years old. The entire family at the time - 6 adults and 4 kids would be at my Grandmother's house in Sault St. Marie in Canada. 9 times out of 10 there was easily 4 feet of snow outside and the tiny 3 bedroom house (with only 1 bathroom - seriously, how did any of us get anything done!) was always cozy and warm with the promise of Santa soon to come.

The memory comes from us 4 kids, 2 girls and 2 younger boys, too excited to sleep, creeping out of our beds and poking or parents to see if 'now' was the time to go see if Santa had come. When one of us kids was finally given the green light, the whole house was roused from what I now understand were very deep sleeps. (Back then, most toys had 'some assembly required' and 4am was early for those parents to get to bed). But us kids, having no concept of what adults were required to do were more than ready to get to the tree!

Now came the next excruciating part of Christmas morning.

Having to wait for those adults.

See, no one was allowed downstairs until everyone was ready to go downstairs. We were instructed to sit on the top step to wait as the adults got ready. Being impatient we swore our parents were dressing for a wedding at the rate they were going but looking back now that one bathroom did cause a bit of a slow down and no one was really getting dressed up or showering.

So there we are at the top of the stairs. Only the stairs weren't straight. There were three steps down to a landing and then the stairs turned right and then straight down. Even though we were told and a few times scolded about staying at the top of the stairs the four of us would sneak down to that landing and lay on our tummies. What the parents probably didn't realize at the time (although they probably did) was that there was a mirror at the bottom of the stairs, and if you angled your head just right you could catch glimpses of what was under the tree!

Presents from Santa were never wrapped so that mirror didn't just hint at what was down there, it gave it all away. But only if you could stay on that landing long enough to get a glimpse before being quickly told to get back to the top step.

And it's that memory that warmed my heart this year. It will be 10 years this February since my Grandmother passed and it's been even more years than that since I have spent a Christmas with those two cousins. But soon, there will be a child coming into our family (my youngest cousin is pregnant!) and it'll be neat to see Christmas from the other side of those stairs.

Thanks for stopping in and Happy Holidays to you all!

This One is About Reading!!

2010-11-27T00:52:00.005-05:00

Aha!! Gotcha!!

No, don't you dare click out!

I'm about to begin my rantification (new word TM me) and you know how I love an audience.

Okay, screw the innocent here's the deal, I just finished reading Play of Passion by Nalini Singh - excellent, excellent book and I'll try and write up a Cindy review over the next few days BUT and this is where my brain turns to screaming:

I. CAN'T. TAKE. THE. WAIT!

No, no, don't leave yet because it's not just about Singh's series so you don't really need to know too much about it.

It's about those two characters in an on going story arc that you just want to read about RIGHT FRIGGIN' NOW!

Now luckily for me the characters I am waiting for get 'their (and I swear on all that is holy, it better be the 'their' I'm thinking about)' story next. So why am I bitching? Cause there were a few scenes in Play of Passion that had my two characters interacting and for some reason I got it in my head that at the end of the story I was currently reading the characters I really want to read about would have scene near the end that would create a major shift in the relationship to give us fans a bit of a sneak peek.

I don't know, I needed something more and because I was slavering for anything about these two I actually started to resent the last few pages of a, before now, excellent love story between two changelings.

So now I'm all antsy (and yes it's November and Christmas is breathing down my neck but still, I'm antsier) about 'my' characters.

And here's the rub. They aren't my characters. They are the author's characters and she is the only one who knows how their possible story will play out. But I want things to explode in their story, I want as close to crazy as these two can get and I really think they could get there. Just, does the author want that for them.

So it's the anticipation that can in the end, ruin a book that I'm so looking forward to that I'm trying to figure out who I have to bribe, kiss or steal a kid for to get my hands on the book - Sybil, you out there?

Okay, you've been patient so I need to know:

1. Can glimpses (or no glimpes) of a couple you really want to read about taint a book that in every other way was perfect?

Uh, Hell ya! But interesting enough, only with Singh. I remember the hearts and flowers I had for Max and Gina by Suzanne Brockmann but M&G interacted so much in the books previous that you knew the angst was building and it was more than enough to keep me from doing up a rantification on my blog. In the case of the book I just read, I would rather have not seen these characters interact at all than have three tempid scenes that confused me more than anything.

2. Are you so much more patient than I am. So many books. So little time to worry when the next will be coming out.

Obviously impatient. What I should have done is not read Play of Passion. I should have saved it and read it the week Hawke's book is set to come out. This is where my 'break in case of emergency' book stash comes in handy. I can hide a bunch of books I know I'll want to read sooner rather than later but I'm stoic enough to put them aside.

3. How is it authors know exactly which couple to keep out of the pages until the very last second?

Shit, I don't know! It's a friggin' gift I tell ya. Or the practices of a well versed sadist!

4. How many times have you been let down by an anticipated book?

Uh, yeah, I've mentioned two of them in this post - Butch's book by J.R. Ward where the man I had come to love morphed into something I didn't recognize. Huge, huge blow. Max and Gina. *sigh* they were robbed.

Okay, we've almost made it through and I have one thing that is making me a touch crazy.

What if Nalini Singh pulls a Brockmann where the couple every one thought was going to get together didn't? (Luckily I was not reading Brockmann at the time of the incident and for-warned is pre-armed I say)

For me, this all explains my blue feeling about finishing Play of Passion. I would have called it the great book blues but it wasn't about the book I had just finished reading. It was instead, a sad for not having the book I want to read in my hot little hands.

Hopefully I've made some sort of point out of all this and you'll find it and run with it.

Introducing Twilight

2010-11-26T23:06:00.005-05:00

I've never in my life had a 'lap' cat but wow, you can barely get seated before this bundle of new joy jumps up and makes herself right at home.

<---- Twilight: What does 'shame' mean?

Amber used to get up in our laps but only once in a while, this little monkey is all over us but I'm thinking the explanation will get it all sorted out.

So how did it all start?

Bob was in bad shape. Okay, I was in bad shape also but I didn't think Bob would want to go see rescue cats so I didn't bring it up and I was okay with it.

What we weren't prepared for was Pixie's reaction to not being able to find Emma. That wonderful purring beauty that Pixie, if she was quiet and sneaky enough, could creep up on and curl into a little ball beside her and drift off into a wonderful sleep. I swear, whenever you found Pixie sleeping anywhere near Emma there was a little kitty smile of triumph on her sweet face. See, I mentioned before Emma was a diva and sharing the spot light was not going to fly and it was too funny to catch that annoyed look on her face when she woke up to discover her personal beauty space had been invaded.

But Pixie adored Emma. Maybe even worshiped her while at the same time managing to pull all kinds of kitten antics that drove Emma batty.

We realized we had a problem when Pixie started to search high and low for Emma. The final straw was when she crawled under our gas stove to see if maybe Em was hiding from her under there.

Bob's reaction was we needed to get Pixie a new best sister. I thought so too but was more on the fence about it.

Flash forward to us in the store looking at this 7 month old kitten/cat through little tiny bars. I opened the cage (cause really, try and stop me) and pulled out this tween kitty to see what she was like. Let's just say, she put on quite a show. I tell you it was like you could hear the litany of 'I love you! I adore you! You love me! You adore me! Take me home!!!!' Played over and over again. We put her back in the cage, our hearts still too raw and then it happened.

She reached through the cage bars and stretched out her toes at me.

Maybe I'm unobservant but I've never seen another cat but Emma pull that trick and never thought I would again.

Bob was cooked on the spot. 'She's reaching for you with her toes!'

Twilight: Shhhh, don't tell. ----->

One day later we were registered and getting all the information for her.

She'd been abandoned in a stairwell with her brother at 6 weeks. There was no real foster family to take these two in so the lady who is the co-owner of the rescue took them home and kept them in a small room together. She said she would go in and play with them but I'm sure with work, the rescue and life in general, these kitties didn't see humans too much. So from a baby to 7 months later this kitten had never had a home.

Which explains the first three days where Twilight couldn't stay off of us and seemed to have no control over her limbs. You would be petting her and her back leg would fly out from no where and she would fall over and then roll all over. It was quite funny but at the same time a wee bit sad.

Aside: She was named Twilight - I tried to explain to Bob that it was like naming an animal Harry Potter (cause Bob has next to no pop culture knowledge but he has at least heard of that) and even though he 'got it' he didn't care, he liked her name. So yes, I'm prepared to answer 'no' to the 'ohhhhh, you named her after ....' for the rest of our lives.

The other funny thing was watching her discover the size of the house. I'm thinking she must think she won the lottery and in little more than 3 days had investigated every nook and cranny and declared herself Queen of all she could see.

And it took her three days before my heart finally melted. It was just too broken at the time but I pet her and cooed to her and was grateful for her but I wasn't bonding as I have always done in the past.

On the third day I started to tell Twilight about Emma and I cried and told her I was sorry. And damn if she didn't stretch her toes up and place her paw on my throat.

I realized then that Twilight was a mixture of all the cats that had been before her.

She looks so much like Pixie that if she races by we can't tell which cat it is. She's called a delicate tortoiseshell and it doesn't show in pictures but she has the colour of Amber's fur running through parts of her coat. She's so loving she reminds me of Bob's cat Bunny who literally drooled while purring at your feet and she's eating like Winston used to (We used to say he was an Emperor in a former life as he had a regal air about him - until he heard the food dish, then it was everyone for them self cause he was coming).

Best of all, Twilight thinks Pixie is the bee's knees.

Pixie is not so enamored and instead of looking under the stove for Em, she now crawls under it to get away from the 'new thing'. But I don't pity her because she tormented Emma just like she is being tormented now.

<--- Pixie: Holy shit! When did she get here!?

And interestingly enough, if Twilight can get just close enough to that massive (and Lord Pixie is HUGE) fur ball on the bed, she'll fall over in contented bliss with a goofy grin that looks just like Pixie's once did.

Welcome home Twilight.

Gorgeous Emma and her Fancy Toes

2010-11-24T05:26:00.004-05:00

Emma left us over a week ago now. I still get teary eyed whenever I think of her and I have been hiding from my blog because I don't feel like I have anything to say that would do her justice.

(This picture was during the summer when it was so hot no one could move. I found her curled up in Bob suit case and I imagined her saying 'that's it, I can't take this heat another minute! I'm out of here!')

Her final hours were not fun and I sat vigil for most of the night. She could no longer walk and would fall out of her bed and make to go somewhere. I finally figured out that maybe she wanted the litter box so I held her up and held her tail - for the tiniest pin drop of urine but it turns out she settled down after that. She lay on her side with her feet spread out in front and in back. She looked like she normally did when she was lazing the day away but I still cried and murmured to her for hours.

I was stunned and so touched when near the end I quietly told her how beautiful her toes were. She was vain about that. I swear I don't know how she could tell someone was talking about her toes but the minute you did she would spread her toes wide and flash her paws at you. For hours she hadn't had the strength to do much but the minute I told her how gorgeous her toes were she threw her front paw out as if to say 'you know it!'.

Emma was the baby of the family for 15 years. I still can't believe how much time has passed and yet, we can mark it with the loss of a large part of our nuclear family (Bob and I got married and I inherited 2 large dogs and 3 cats.) I miss the craziness of the house, the silly things that happen when you turn your head for a minute. So not only am I mourning the loss of Emma, I'm mourning the loss of Rocky, Cody, Bunny, Winston and Amber all over again.

Emma was a diva.

There's no way around it. The world revolved around her or things were going to get 'poopy' in a very literal sense. When she needed pampering she would find Amber and get her to bathe her until just that point where Em decided that was plenty, thank you very much, and she head butted Amber. We had to feel for Amber. A love session never ended in a relaxing nap. Nope, Amber would have to play her way out of the situation.

And Emma was not a 'dog person'. Or those beasts from the bowels of hell as I'm sure she was want to call Rocky and Cody. Poor Em if she happened to be between the dogs and the back door where their food was waiting. I saw Em get flattened a few times and for the vain one she was, that could not go unpunished. Too bad it was Bob and I that got the punishment but Em was not going to deal with any mutt.

In the early years I remember that Amber would head to bed with Bob while Emma would get up on the back of the couch and put her paw on my shoulder while I watched TV. Just a soft purring in my ear. When we moved the TV to the basement I lost that little delight as I said dogs were not to be tolerated.

That said, the day Rocky died Emma went down to the basement in our new house and touched her nose to his. Rocky was so out of it he didn't know but Bob and I cried to see her come and say good-bye. How she knew was beyond us.

I guess I think of Emma as a refined woman, dressed to the nines in jewels and fur who looks like she doesn't have a care in the world but deep down she has a heart of gold.

I miss her.

Just a Worry Post

2010-11-13T03:51:00.003-05:00

Em is in really bad shape.

So bad I'm not comfortable with how she is doing but the vet wants us to give her some steroids and appetite stimulants and Bob picks those up in the morning. I should tell him to bring her to me while I'm in bed so I can get them down her. (Bob's not good with meds and his babies)

I pray that by tomorrow night I see an improvement because right now, Em looks like she's knocking on that door.

I want to pick her up and hold her but she was never really a lap kitty and I don't want to hurt her inadvertently.

Also, she smells of urine and sickness which makes me want to give her a small warm bath but Bob doesn't want her to catch a chill. I'm worried she feels horrible and is embarrassed about the way she smells. Although Amber was the one who would be mortified if she stank.

Every once in a while the kitten approaches her and chirps at her as if to say 'you ready to play now?'

I know you guys know I love my furry critters and my chest hurts from trying not to cry. I figure there is never a good time to make this kind of decision but tonight it's been all I can do not to wake Bob and say 'it's time'. I will give the meds 48 hours for a turn around. After that, my girl would be suffering and that's not acceptable.

On an aside: My vet has cost us 800 bucks over the past month with Em. Some of the costs were for blood work that needed to be sent away for virus results. That night I read about the virus Em possibly has and it said the best way to test for the virus was with the fluid they drew off her. So yeah. The blood results were negative and now the vet wants me to bring Em in to be drained again so they can do the 'right' test. Cause it's either this virus or bladder cancer. Guess what, same end result.

If I didn't already know Bob's situation with work I would have no problem with the (I'm sure) 200 bucks it would cost for these tests but at this moment, I'm not really sure of the benefit and Em would be taken from her home again and poked and prodded.

I do know the virus can be detected after death with tissue samples but Lord knows what that would cost. My only concern at that point would be Pixie and potentially any new kittens we would bring into the home.

Phew. Sorry it's dreary here right now but getting this written out really does make it easier to get back up and keep going. I wasn't going to sleep if I didn't get the mess and fear out of my brain.

Oh, fun side trip. The other night I showed Bob a kitty bed that is heated and Bob was all, 'we have to get that for Em'. I was thinking if she was in pain then maybe heat would help. We put it in the laundry basket she has procured as her own little slice of life but I wasn't sure she was happy about it. So I then took the bed out but I put it beside her basket and lo and behold, a few hours later I found she had picked the heated bed as a preferred spot.

And yes, it tickled me pink to think it might be helping.

Damn, I love that furry nut.

I know there are readers here who have had to make the same decisions and doesn't it just suck! But I wouldn't give up a minute Bob and I got with our Em and her funny ways but that would be for another post - that I wish I didn't have to make for a few years yet.

I hope you are having a great weekend.

When it goes bad I plan on plunking my butt down and reading Play of Passion by Nalini Singh. I was very excited when I picked it up but doing the AAR poll has been uh, time consuming. And I forgot, the ones who send in their lists later are the die hard list makers which means almost all the ballots have 100 titles (early in the poll you can have 100 then 20 then 40 then another 100 - so the inputting isn't so intense. Now it's all 100s baby!)

Okay, off to kiss Em on her forehead and to tell her I love her again (I'm sure she's all, yeah, yeah, you love me - now go get me some pain meds!! I hear Oxycotin is nice.) Poor Baby.

The World is Tilting

2010-11-10T04:35:00.003-05:00

I don't want to come off too upset as I know I'm a very blessed person.

1. Bob's work may be coming to a close - through no fault of his own but this economy has been no help and I know there are tons of people in the same boat. I get it. I'm just scared of the unknown and I shouldn't be. Tonight Bob was told he could be an asset for another company so if/when every thing falls apart to go see them. And like many things, this is awesome but in the real world things get tough and even those people who would love to have you on their staff just might not have it in their budget. So we're in a wait and see pattern. Would it be great if Bob could continue in the job he has - absolutely but we also understand if that job needs to be lost.

This part has been made easier when I can openly talk to Bob about my fears and he can calm me down. He says I'm his rock and as long as I'm fine he'll be fine. I'm a fairly easy going person - hey, now, I can be! - and in reality I'm not the 'big' spender in the house. I have patience to wait for things - Bob not so much so Bob's life will change much more than mine. Except for having fewer TV channels and maybe dial up Internet.

Okay, dial up Internet gives me hives but I can do it!

2. This one I'm working on.

Emma may have a virus which is untreatable. Death is the end result. Emma is 14 and has had a great life and I wish she could live forever but I understand if it's her time. Over the past few months Emma has had great days and not so great days. She had a UTI which was treated but then it seemed to come back 5 days later - only her whole stomach was bloated up.

Today after X-Rays and blood tests the vet discovered massive fluid filling her belly area. She took 1/2 a litre of fluid off her tummy which caused Emma to lose a whole pound. Then she dropped to diagnosis on me and the fact that there was really nothing that can be done.

What stumped the vet was that the virus was normally found in younger cats. I then thought to ask if it was contagious and she said 'yes' and I about fell on the floor. I told her about Pixie and she said that Pixie has probably brought it into the house. Again, I was on the floor. With tears in my eyes I asked her if both my cats were going to die of this and her answer was 'quite possibly yes'.

My heart and head can't seem to fathom this. I've never had to put down a baby animal (I'm sorry, they are just babies until they get over 12 years of age) and can't wrap my brain around Pixie getting sick. Also, the fear of losing Emma is already making me sore but the idea that Bob and I would be a one kitty family makes me want to cry also. Only because if Pixie has the virus, I couldn't possibly bring in another cat that might get the virus and get sick also.

I have done some reading about the virus (and I'll know if it's this one on Friday (although reading the symptoms I'm saying the doc is right) and I'm not sure if the vet is completely right about the spread. Also, it's common for cats to carry the virus that can then mutate into this deadly one.

What does this mean? We could have Pixie tested and it will come back normal but she could still carry it.

Sorry, I'm just trying to work it all out in my brain. Em isn't happy tonight - I think the fluid withdrawal was a bit of a shock to her system and I think she is in some pain but I insisted on antibiotics to at least get the UTI under control. Hopefully in three days Em will be a happy kitty again and we'll just have to watch for fluid build up. And hopefully the kitten doesn't have or get it at all.

So that's where my brain is right now.

And you know what is comforting me? The idea of all the books I have to read and re-read. I told Bob the good news was that I had lots of books to keep me busy if he loses his job.

Right now I'm working on my list of 100 Favourite Books to enter into AAR's ballot. I have a preliminary list worked up - I used Shelfari and this blog to pick out titles and now I need to arrange them and remember those that I usually miss.

Thanks for listening. It just makes it easier when I can write it all down.

I hope you all are doing well!

No News...

2010-10-28T05:40:00.003-04:00

Short and sweet.

Doing the polls with LinnieGayl and Lee for the Top 100 Favorite Romance books and that is some serious work. We have a spreadsheet with over 3500 titles on it and I'm still adding in new lines with every ballot. And since I'm a little crazy when it comes to working with Excel I take my time and at the moment I'm very, very behind. Not that I'm complaining - just explaining why I'm not really around right now and will continue to not be so around until late November.

I've read nothing - read above paragraph.

I want to read everything. Okay, that should say 're-read everything' because I'm wondering about my own ballot and if I will leave some titles off because it's been years since I read the book. I mean, does it hold up? I'm not sure, so I'm hoping I can get a list done up soon but again, read the first paragraph.

My anxiety is fairly under control but I haven't finished our Christmas shopping which always causes extra beats for my heart. Ugh.

The swinging sister to anxiety is depression. I'm not super depressed but I know I'm not myself. I need to get on the treadmill and start working out every day. Last year I was on it in October - it's looking like November will be the start time for me.

And damn, I hate to even talk about it but I need to diet for real. I keep saying I'm not ready. But there will be a baby here in February and I want to be fit enough to play with the cutie. And fitting into smaller clothes would be a bonus.

So yeah, lots to do with nothing getting done.

Hope you are fairing better than I am!

Top 100 Romance Books

2010-10-17T01:48:00.004-04:00

AAR's poll for the Top 100 Romance Books is now up and running. *phew!*

I know a few people like to play in the polls so I thought I would let you all know - you can go here to enter your list. I'll post here again when the results are done.

A few years ago I compiled my list and got to number 34 and after that my head exploded. So no stress, how ever far you get is how far you get - just send your list in with 3 or 100 book titles, it's all up to you.

But seriously, I was so frustrated by book 34 I didn't know if I was coming or going. Was J.R. Ward's latest book a smidge better than Singh's latest or am I getting this all messed up. I take things too literally.

I'm thinking in the end, if I can put the book down as one of my top picks for favourites, then who cares if it's 40th or 1st. Not on my own list anyways. Once you get a bunch of people's lists together, then the numbers mean something to me.

For me, the top 20 should be read. Although I can't say I have read all of them. After that, if you have already tried an author then I'm just as happy to let a title in 54th place pass me by.

I'll give you a heart rending example: I'm not reading Jane Austen.

Sorry.

I'm just not that kind of reader. And I'm not ever sure what that means. Maybe if I get kidnapped and locked up in a room with only Jane Austen type books I'll get around to reading them. Since I've got any number of distractions running around my house including a TBR mountain, then I can pass.

And maybe one day I will get around to Diana Gabaldon.

Maybe.

Now, give me the latest Anne Stuart and it's probably on my list around number 86.

You know, if I get that far.

How about you?

Wanna make a list?

Already know which books you aren't really ever planning on reading? (except in that one scenario where you are on a desert island and the only books there are the ones you figured you'd never read but hot damn you are bored and reading is better than sitting so you'll pick up that friggin author that writes books that make your teeth hurt cause that's all there is.)

Thankfully Done

2010-10-11T23:33:00.003-04:00

Canadian Thanksgiving was this weekend and we hosted so I was a touch busy doing my Fall cleaning. Spring cleaning rarely happens as the pool seems to call very early.

This year, I dove into the pool for the last time on the Labour Day weekend. It's been an odd fall and not getting to swim again may come back to bite me in the arse.

Last year at this time I started walking on the treadmill to keep myself active during the winter months - little did I know the summer this year was going to be the killer. Backward couch potato.

So plans for the treadmill are on high for this week - I got on last week and the sweat pouring off me was something else. But I know I have to get back into it and get healthier. Now that the house is almost back to rights, I feel like I have more time.

Luckily I seem to have survived the plague that came to the house - poor Aunt went from sounding fine Saturday afternoon to sounding way too sick by Saturday evening. I'm taking my vitamins and cleaning up my hands enough to hopefully keep everything at bay. I didn't feel great on Sunday but I think I was just wore out.

On the agenda the past week was work on the Top 100 Romance Book poll for AAR. I have been doing some HTML and I'm trying to learn about php files. So that took up some time this past week and will continue on into this week and then once the poll starts I'll be counting up ballots.

So if you visit AAR or just want to play with your books and try to sort them from the mostest favourite to the next mostest favourite then you have some extra time. We're hoping the ballot goes live on Friday and the polling will end on the 14th of November.

As to life, Gorgeous Cousin is now looking pregnant and I keep thinking how February will be here before we know it. I'm very excited and I know GC is too.

Before that though there are more than a few birthdays and of course, my Achilles heel, Christmas.

But Bob should be off on vacation next week so I'm thinking we can knock most of the gifts off the list and maybe I'll even wrap stuff up so I won't feel over exposed in December.

And books. I really want to read more books.

Wonder if I can find time for that this week?

Okay, off to watch some TV.

Checking In

2010-10-03T00:06:00.002-04:00

I have more than a few things I need to be doing on the internet at the moment and no, gaming is not one of them. Although it'll happen.

Diabetic cold medicine is the new Holy Grail and so far I'm sucking wind. We have one brand in the house but I don't understand how a cough suppressant can also be an expectorant so we went looking again tonight. I found a sugar free expectorant so I bought that one. It wasn't until Bob went to take the medicine and he read the side of the box where it says 'if you have diabetes don't take this'.

I don't know if Bob has diabetes as he was told he was borderline. He doesn't have to take insulin shots but takes a pill every night and monitors his sugar. Meanwhile, GC is insulin diabetic and she knows she can't take over the counter cold meds.

That States have Diabetic Tussin but it's not up here as far as I can see and I can't find an official site. Bah.

All that said, Bob is feeling better. I think he just wants it out of his chest. Meanwhile I get much better when a cold finally hits my chest.

I also need to look for DVD storage that won't burn my eyes with it's hideousness. Bob wants all our DVD movies out on shelves so he can see what we have. Problem is I've learned I'm a visual person and seeing rows of DVDs makes my brain hurt. So it needs a door. And if I have to look at it beside my TV then I want it to look nice. I suggested bookshelves at the bottom of our stairs in the basement (the place I refuse to go) but that went over like a lead balloon. So Bob and I are at a stalemate.

I also need to check out a few things but that won't take long.

So enough dithering.

Oh, Right, It's Fall Again

2010-09-27T22:52:00.006-04:00

Bob's sick.

Poor guy, I said for years he was a carrier because he never got sick. Never! So I'm a wee bit worried about him and the strength of what he's got.

As a rule, when Bob does get sick he doesn't slow down. He figures he can be sick at work or at home so might as well go to work. I, however, find this thinking so messed up it pisses me off. Why? Cause I said to Bob, 'who's the idiot who was sick at work this past week?' Yep, some sickie hacked and coughed over everything last week. No wonder Bob's sick.

My philosophy is - if you're sick stay the fuck home. Even just for one day. (Course, now I understand there are companies that don't pay people for sick days which I think is a crime. I think everyone should have at least 3 paid sick days a year - that's not too many and probably just enough). The contagious nature of most colds / flu happen in the early stages so I'm all about staying home in the beginning.

I should mention here that I took a course (elective at that) called Plagues and people. To say my world was rocked during that class is putting it mildly. I'm thinking I'm probably one of those people who knows just enough to be dangerous (stupid). Let's just say that the so called 'quarantine' measures I've seen countries put up are laughable to the extreme (this includes Canada's reaction to SARS). In no way do I think the world today could handle a mass break out of any type of disease but I seem okay with that knowledge.

Cheery bit this post is eh?

Anyways, my stalwart husband came home today about 2 hours after he left for work - surprise that! He worked from home (cause just sitting and vegging is not Bob's way) and hacked all over our computer desk, keyboard and friggin' monitor. You better believe I whipped out the Lysol wipes and cleaned off the surfaces. Probably won't save me but hey, I'm giving it a go.

On the home front, Bob and I have now painted our master bedroom way too many times.

Primer coat on the ceiling and four walls - I did.

2 coats of ceiling paint, cutting in around the edges to get a nice white line for separation - I did.

Picked a colour - Nath was right, Bob's colour blind and about had a spaz attack when I said I didn't like the colour - 1 coat on the walls with cutting in - Bob did.

Bought the colour I originally wanted - Bob cut in and painted 4 walls one coat and had a complete meltdown. The cut in looked lighter than the rest of the walls - never seen this before.

I decided to cut in again only to discover that Bob had taken the new paint pail out of the room and I was painting with the original colour that I didn't like. It never occurred to me that he would leave the paint in the room that was the wrong one. I know you are thinking 'didn't you notice?' and seriously, I was painting and thinking how it must dry much lighter - only while cleaning the brush did I think back and go 'uh, no, paint dries darker!!! zomg!!!'

Cindy has meltdown.

Bought another gallon of paint - cut in and painted all walls yet again - I did. There is still a problem with the top part of the walls - a bit lighter still.

Walls feel tacky and I'm not sure they are drying properly so I have told Bob we need to leave the damn thing to cure for the next week. (Bob likes to get things done but hates painting - which is why I get mad when he does paint - I like painting so leave it alone!)

So fingers crossed the walls dry up and the colour bleeds together nicely.

Now I just want to read for a few days but I'm thinking sickie is going to take up all my strength.

At least I bought a couple books - Anne's latest and I think Jayne Ann Castle's latest (although I'm not sure as I haven't been following her series for a few years)

Okay, off to play.

Caleb by Sarah McCarty

2010-09-21T15:53:00.001-04:00

I wrote this post back in April when I was trying to find my muse and decided it's kind of a book-review so I'll post it now. Unless you guys want an in depth discussion on how my sleeping is so screwed that I slept 18 hours today without feeling it? I'm thinking my 27 hour wakeful zone from the weekend had something to do with this crash but like I said, it gets messy.

Okay, Caleb by Sarah McCarty

I picked up some Sarah McCarty books because I have seen a few good reviews and some people talk about her as an auto-buy. Can I remember where I saw all this, uh no. But that's why this one was pulled off Mt. TBR.

Overall a good story. It's a paranormal with weres and vampires although definitely not the type of vampire I'm used to seeing. The weres we meet seemed like most.

The book started out great and I thought I was in for quite the ride. The heroine is sass personified and knows her own mind and I liked her by the second chapter when she was forced to act and act she did.

So lots of action and then ... things kind of fell into the background. The action part and the sass from the heroine. I found the conversations between Caleb and Allie to be so circular that I just wanted to shake them both. Caleb is hiding tons of things from Allie about becoming a vampire but the things she does know only make her feel inadequate and quite frankly depressed.

Before all that there is some sexing going on. And well, I didn't find it all that sexy.

Don't get me wrong, I think this book would be rated up in the sex scale - like hot but not exactly burning. Hmm, not sure. I need more angst or even passion and chemistry between the H/H than I found here.

Another problem that had me shifting images in my head so many times that I didn't know where any of the characters were in relation to each other (not good in sex scene) or even in the room. One minute Caleb would be cradling Allie in his lap then without any mention he would be in a chair or even standing up.

(I haven't finished the story yet - I'd say I'm 2/3 through the book and I think it's going to take something huge to get me to finish the book. I just wanted to get some of my thoughts down so I would remember the good and the bad so far.)

Uh, finished, kind of.

Let's just say I got within a few chapters of the end and stopped caring. I'm trying to figure out if I rated that as a DNF or just say 'yeah, I got the gist and finally decided I didn't need to know how it ended.

I'm going to read Jared's book which I think is the next book but I will start skimming if I run into some of the rambling conversations that happened in this book.

I liked Allie as a heroine for part of the story, then she kind of flaked out. I'm not sure if it was because she became cut off from her life and life became the house the men lived in or what but Lord, it became depressing. If this had been a historical western I could have understood the isolation but it's a contemporary that read like a historical at times. I understand that these brothers don't really want to expose themselves but to stay so isolated seemed odd.

Anyways, I'm not sure why I want to read Jared's story but I own the book so I'll take a quick boo through it.

There was a scene in this story that had me thinking 'okay, now we're getting somewhere' and then it didn't pan out. Basically, I'm thinking it would have worked better as a threesome story - and I have yet to read one.

I know, things I haven't read yet. Epic.

Couch Potato Re-hab

2010-09-17T03:37:00.008-04:00

Lord have mercy I have been a lazy couch potato for way too long. The heat helped to keep me from doing anything harder than lifting an ice cold coca-cola to my lips and releasing a happy sigh but what a difference temperature can make.

Tonight I decided to tackle priming (painting) our master bedroom - it's in reno hell - old closets got ripped out and re-plastering every where but if it keeps Bob from spending too much money at home depot then I can live with the dust. Well, Bob's been away for 4 days and for the first 3 days lazy won out over everything. I was disgusted with myself because I used to paint rooms over while Bob slept but my moving mojo jumped out and left me high and dry.

So I decided to quit letting lazy win and climbed out of my comfy chair and got to work. Right now there are two teeny tiny muscles in my arms screaming at me to just knock it off already. I have to say I hate painting ceilings because of the white on white and never knowing where you are. Paint people have come up with that blue/pink ceiling paint that turns to white which will be lovely after all the priming is done. (but that turn happens so fast if you blink you can miss where you were).

I put 2 coats of primer on the ceiling (it's the super primer stuff that is more oozy to put on the wall - it covers stains and plaster repairs and oil based paints so it's a must if you have an older home) and 1 coat all around the room. I would have done another coat (okay, I did one wall twice and about fainted) but it was hot and I was sticky and it was shower time.

The other pain of this stuff is it stinks to high Heaven. Bad stuff that usually gives me a headache but hey, hopefully that part is almost done. What Bob will do now is check for repairs he has to make to the patching - any lines that pop out or holes in the mud - trust me, waking up and staring at a ceiling that is less than perfect will kill my Aries hubby. So hopefully I can not worry about that part so much.

I loved the summer this year but it's nice to be 'doing' things again. Bob and I tried to keep the A/C off for as long as we could cause we're all energy conscious and stuff now (like what the hell?) and I remember just walking across the room was enough work in the heat of the afternoon.

So treadmill here I come again.

Not tonight though. Another night. No really, another night.

Actually I'm probably the only person on the planet who can do an 1 hour walk on the treadmill 5 nights for 7 months of the year and not lose an ounce but stop for 3 months and my girth groweth again.

Oh, so I've stopped buying those 100 calorie treat things because I would have 2 bags when I got up and another 2 before bed. Yep, 400 calories without thinking about it. So I've cut that out and I'm trying to learn to enjoy diet pop. Turns out if I'm eating I can drink diet but I can't sit and sip at a diet pop - which is probably a good thing.

Tonight I cracked like the pop whore that I am and ordered in 4 regular Pepsi with my dinner. I've had 2. I also ordered chocolate cake which I think will die an inglorious death in the next few hours.

The good news is there is always tomorrow.

Course, that's been my motto for a few years - looks like I need a new one!

So lay 'em on me - any great mottoes (Great Scott - that don't look right) you got stashed away?

5 Years!? Okay, 4 1/2

2010-09-15T21:48:00.002-04:00

So while I was away goofing around in the pool and playing way too many online games (Facebook is evol!) my Bloggiversary blew on by.

5 years.

I'm going to count it more as 4 1/2 seeing as how I didn't blog for like 3 months in a row at one point.

So I'm struggling with putting sentences together. No, really. I can't seem to write a few words without having to sit back and yank it out of my brain. I now will type for as long as I can and then go through and toss junk out.

I discovered this while trying to review Anne Stuart's August book for Sybil. I couldn't get anything down on paper and it was making me crazy. Normally I just sit and crap comes forth but lately, it's like my brain has no clue what's going on.

So I'm just going to have to put it out there, the good and the horrid until I get my mind back into working order.

There's lazy and then there's crazy lazy and I'm thinking my brain was heading for the crazy.

Bad Brain.

Dark Need at Night's Edge by Kresley Cole

2010-09-13T00:27:00.000-04:00

I finally stopped dithering around about picking a book and went with another Cole.

YUMMMMMM.

Cindy Blurb: There's this ghost see, and well, that would normally have stopped me cold in my tracks but I know that Cole writes books about 'the Lore' so I figured it's not like one of those ghost stories where everyone is human and something weird happens at the end of the book for a convoluted HEA.

Okay, right, a ghost named Neomi who died in the 1920's on what was supposed to be the best night of her life. Neomi wanted to live so badly and fought her death so much that she was stunned when she came too and no one could see or hear her. For 80 years she lives in her dream home, wearing her gorgeous dress without anyone knowing she exists.

Meanwhile, three vampire brothers are trying everything they can to save their 'rogue' brother from being killed. In the Lore, there are good and evil vampires and the ones with red eyes are those who have killed while taking blood and are deemed evil. These vampires are tormented by the memories of those they have killed and end up not knowing their own thoughts from those that end up there from others. In the end, most of these vampires go insane and become nothing more than killing machines.

Conrad Wroth is considered a prime example of this. Add to this he wants to kill his own brothers and things get complicated. In order to save Conrad, his brothers lock him in an old gothic house where he sees a beautiful woman who enchants him and makes him wonder if he has finally gone completely mad.

I love lost causes.

Conrad is almost completely lost and the early parts from his point of view show us how disjointed his thoughts are. Conrad is clinging to his sanity or the parts he recognizes for no other reason than to kill his own brothers for cursing him to the ghastly immortal life he is forced to live. The good news is that he doesn't seem bitter as much as just determined and with good reason which you find out over the course of the story.

(note to readers: I just took a gravol so things might get dicey)

Conrad's brothers Sebastian, Murdock and _________ refuse to give up on Conrad and after 300 years of separation they have finally figured out a way to save him. They need him to stop drinking blood from the vein (you know, I'm not sure how it's different from drinking blood from a glass but I think they mentioned that taking from the vein is 'live' blood so the victim's memories come with it). Conrad, not being rational and believing his time is almost up anyways wants nothing to do with this 'cure' and so the brothers kidnap him, have some witches put a spell on an old gothic mansion to keep him from escaping and begin his treatment.

He sees a ghostly woman the night they capture him. Is she a fragmented memory, his final stages of insanity or could she really exist.

I really liked Neomi and even though she is innocent when it comes to the Lore, in life she lived to extremes. She is surprised to discover the men in her house are vampires, that there are such things as witches and others called Valkyrie and the like. She is moved the most by the 'crazy' man the brothers have brought to cure. He is savage, covered in blood and filth and yet, she wonders as he sleeps if he can really see her. She longs to be seen and acknowledged and if this be her only way then so be it.

I have to admit there are some weird otherworldly things at work through the later half of the book. At one point you're thinking 'really!? Again!!' But hey, it's a Cole and I enjoy her stories and I liked the crazed Conrad and his ghost Neomi much better than I've liked some of her other characters.

B

September Should Be Good

2010-09-09T00:42:00.006-04:00

Hey, hope all is well with you guys. Special hugs to Kristie - I'm not sure she can surf the net yet but I know I'm not the only one thinking of her and wishing her a speedy recovery.

I just finished Dark Need at Night's Edge by Kresley Cole and will hopefully post my thoughts in the next few days. Dang if I'm not meeting more and more interesting characters that I want to know more about but I'm going to try and resist the urge to pick up another Cole until at least October. Seasoned reader that I am, I know I'll start to see similarities if I read all the books back to back so I'll savour them better a bit at a time.

I don't know about you guys but I have times in my life where things just seem to pile on. I don't even have that much I need to do but I tend to bend to expectations a bit too easily and the past 3 weeks have been hard on the body.

Okay, more like 6 weeks.

Let's just say that in order to sleep when I need to I've been concocting just a few too many potions to get me sleeping and back up in time for things to happen. This past weekend my body told me it was done. I won't type out what I took (cause it's a touch shameful) but it didn't touch me. Not even a little bit.

Since I'm far from crazy I told Bob to just let me be for the next few weeks. I don't want to hear about 'you should get up at noon' or 'hey, you going to get up today' or nothing. I swear I have had to be up all summer at specific times to do this, that or the other and I'm done. Turns out you can have too much of a good thing cause I'm ready for Fall this year!

This morning I climbed into bed naturally tired for the first time in a looooooong time. Bob comes to kiss me good-bye before leaving for work. Imagine my shock when I hear Bob at the bedside and I ask if he's off to work - 'Uh, no, I just got home - it's 5 o'clock'. I'd slept for 10 straight hours and it had felt like I had just blinked my eyes.

I'm looking forward to feeling stable again!

Other than that complaint summer was excellent! The heat had us using our pool more in one summer than probably the last few summers combined. Also, my youngest Godson (9) and my best bud's guy (7) both learned to be fearless in the water. Watching these two finally break through their fear and become two water lovers was way too much fun - and active for Aunt Cindy who tread tons of water and learned she was strong enough to hold up at least 60 lbs in deep water - cause kids are afraid of grabbing onto you when their not sure of their safety and the 2 mommies aren't swimmers like me.

Anyways, I'll dust off this old blog of mine and see if I can be more fresh and observant (doubtful) on a more regular basis (hopeful).

Afterall, Wendy reminded me of what blogging should be about and sometimes I forget.

How 'bout you? How you doing?

Demon From The Dark Kresley Cole

2010-08-30T22:42:00.000-04:00

How does Kresley Cole do it?

I should have hated this book but again, Cole pulls it off.

CindyBlurb: Carrow the _____(crumb, can't remember her moniker) is a witch who has been kidnapped and pulled into a super secret, super hidden jail run by mortals who are gathering all sorts of lore creatures to dissect and learn about. Carrow can't use her powers (usually powered by happiness) because of a collar around her neck. Turns out all the lore are helpless with this thingamajiggi round their necks good or evil, allies or warring factions.

Carrow is normally a 'whatever' kind of woman and doesn't really sweat the small stuff. Until the small stuff comes in a package of Ruby, her 7 year old cousin whose mother was just killed. The Order (as these new baddies are called) what something from Carrow and in return they will release her and Ruby from the jail.

What do they want?

They want Carrow to go to hell.

Yep.

At least, I think I have that right. Basically another plane of existence that is hell like with drought, famine, fire and demons. There are a ton of new creatures also but vampires are also part of the landscape.

What is Carrow retrieving from hell? A Vemon - a creature that are only rumoured to exist by the lore but are believed to be mythical. But hey, whatever, Carrow needs to get the hell out of Dodge so to the hell plane it is. And the Order will turn off the collar do-hicky so she can use her powers. Woohoo. Except how much joy can there be in hell? Yeah.

The Vemon Malkom meanwhile was created by an Evil and has lived in isolation for much of his existence. He is a demon and vampire and believes he is an abomination to all. He has been betrayed by every single person he has ever met (yep, includes mommy) and killed his best friend in a fit of rage and betrayal. Malkom is way beyond acting even remotely human has become more of a Neanderthal over the past 400 years.

What's the only thing that's going to save Carrow from a gory death? She's Malkom's mate and he scents her as she approaches.

And the chase is ON.

Lord, there is so much I want to explain about the story and stuff but wow, it's just really involved and yet so simple.

So where did I have problems? Pretty much the first half of the book. Could I put the book down? No.

Explaination to follow - so hang on!

My problem head on was Malkom. He's 7 feet tall, got horns and sounds like a huge mother. In fact, I couldn't get this image out of my head.

Sorry, I find this guy freaky and not even remotely attractive. In fact, you need to add more hunch to his back and no wings.

This image fought along side an image of a seriously huge body builder - trust me, I was trying to find him attractive and even though I like leaner heroes I could at least work with a overbuilt man-like being.

None of my mental images were helped by the early interactions with Carrow. He's brutish and animalistic in the extreme and about rapes her the first time he catches her. Hell, he breaks her wrist in his enthusiasm. Yeah, not winning any 'ooohhh, you're so hot' kind of awards.

Carrow bolts and who can blame her. He follows. He catches and brings her back to his lair.

The good news is Carrow understands the things that neither of them can communicate because they don't speak each others language. Carrow knows only stupid stuff in Demonish and the Demon despises English so taught himself to forget all he learned. I guess 300 years is good enough to forget something you want nothing to do with.

For me there was definitely a vibe of Carrow being so much more intelligent than Malkom and I'm not sure she isn't even now.

Malkom became more of a character I could understand once he showed he had a logical side buried under all that brute strength but boy, he really had to concentrate to get there.

So why did I like this book?

I'm not sure I know but the last half was awesome.

I understand the allure of Beauty and Beast like stories but when the beast has very simplistic views of how things will be, I'm not so enamoured. Malkom did prove he could be logical but his beast side won out on more than one occasion. In the end, it was Carrow and even Ruby who made the book great. Seeing fleeting images of love stories coming and those that had already happened were also a great boon.

And since I'm not great with words, just know that after reading this story I want to read the few books I have in the series that I haven't read. Thankfully I can't find them at the moment so I can't gorge on them all at once and then have the great book blues.

Still, I may need to dig one out for next week.

B- (I have to say I would probably re-read this book as it was sexy as hell once my brain stopped trying to beat me up with the image above)

Edited: I found the three books I haven't read in this series and I'm fighting with myself not to grab them all up and gobble them down.

It Happened

2010-08-28T01:22:00.006-04:00

I turned 40 the other day and the world didn't go rumbling off it's axis, dinosaurs didn't regenerate and the sun came up again.

So it's all good. I'm glad it's is over to be honest and I can get back to being just me.

Okay, I do have my family coming tomorrow for dinner and then Bob's family the next day but then I can check 'done' beside 'turning 40'.

I got a video camera (have these changed names? There is no tape in them but without the video it would just be digital camera which means stills) because :

MY GORGEOUS COUSIN IS PREGNANT & THERE WILL BE A BABY IN FEBRUARY!!!

She's also engaged to be married sometime after that but whatever, let's deal with the baby first.

For me it's a big deal although the rest of the family seems to be taking the whole thing hard. GC has Type 1 diabetes so there are concerns for sure and she's in high-risk management of the pregnancy so we're all praying hard. I think it's the fiance people are having a hard time with and I get it, but I won't steal the joy from GC. It's her life and who are we to judge.

So, it's the first baby as I don't have any and Billy didn't either. I'm excited about future Christmas' and holidays because there will be somebody there who will think it's all new and shiny.

And hey, we all need a little new and shiny in our lives.

Other than that bombshell things are going well.

I just finished Demon from the Dark by Kresley Cole and have written a partial review that I will post over the next few days. I want to dig out the newest Anne Stuart but I want to save it at the same time. So I'm flailing about what to read next but I'm thinking I need to hunt down the 3 Cole stories I haven't read but are in the TBR pile.

Okay, off to bed for me!

Logical Sense? Nope.

2010-08-20T00:08:00.004-04:00

Strap in. This one is downright crazy.

Last night I discovered an item was at my local store. In fact, this store showed it's inventory for the stores all around my home and they all showed stock.

All of them.

And the numbers were such that I knew I would get this item.

Excellent.

Only surprise, surprise, not excellent at all.

Instead my anger has been simmering at such a rate that a letter will be written to the Owner of these stores very soon. In fact, I was sure she was going to get a phone call tonight. Cause in the end, there is no logical sense for what I'm dealing with.

We've all heard of 'lay down dates' or something stupid and moronic like that. I mean seriously, the concept defies logic.

I didn't say 'they' whoever the corporate 'they' is don't have a reason, I'm saying it is completely illogical.

But really, screw all that.

It comes down to this.

If you own a business and decide for whatever reason to put up your inventory stats on your website so that your CUSTOMERS know where to go to buy an item - THEN FRIGGIN' SELL IT TO THEM WHEN THEY SHOW UP.

I'm livid. Like seriously out of sorts and I don't get that bad that often.

Back before the internet and in-store computers I didn't know what was and wasn't in stock unless I made a trip to the store. And, get this!! If the store didn't have what you were looking for they would check the stock room.

No way!!!

They checked the stock room!?

Yep.

AND, if they had the item in the stock room they did this weird thing.

They sold it to you.

I know!!!

Such an odd concept.

Tonight a local store (who had 40 some odd 'items' in stock) refused to sell me the item because the 'release date' wasn't until next week.

Now, did I yell at the associate who was helping me?

No. It's not their fault. Not tonight (oy vey, the one from 3 weeks ago - I swear my hair was on fire).

She helpfully informed me that I could put the item on hold if I liked and me being me, said:

No thanks, someone will have the item out for sale.

To which she replied:

Oh, no, they shouldn't, they are all 'us' so they won't sell you the item.

Two phone calls later I found the store that would sell me the item cause you know what, it's on your friggin website showing you have stock.

You know what else happened?

I bought another 20 dollars worth of items at the other store.

Still, I have this foul taste in my mouth. I'm lit up about the way this was handled. I'm an avid itemer so yes, I will find the item or come back on the sale date.

You know who won't come back?

Those 10 other customers who were looking for a gift for a friend, colleague, child or whoever. You know those non-itemers. Those customers who would be just as happy to buy a different
item by a completely different manufacturer as long as it looks like the original item, who cares if it's a knock off.

Cause in the end, they don't need that one item.

You know, by that one creator.

That creator who would probably like to make the money than lose a sale or 10.

And why? Because some crybaby somewhere won't count sales before the release date.

I'm guessing this is because of some horribly convoluted math calculation that math geniuses the world over have been beating their brains out trying to solve.

"SHIT, how DO you count things that are sold before the sell date? HOW!? and OMG, which week of sales would we put that it!?"

The first week.

BOOM baby.

That's how you solve that math equation.

Seriously.

I can't believe there is this odd entity that doesn't want to separate me from my money. This entity has so much power it causes the creators, the manufacturers and the stores to all act like lunatics.

No, no, you keep your money, we don't want it yet.

Fine, how about you don't get my money at all.

Cause I met someone new and they were more than happy to take my money.

Idiots.

Edited: I will share with you the comparison I made to Bob tonight while trying to explain my frustration.

Imagine Home Depot got a load of specific 2x4's in stock but they refused to sell you any because they weren't allowed to sell them until next week.

Bob was sufficiently horrified and mumbled 'Home Depot would never do that to me'

And you know what, he's right!!

Anne Stuart's Ruthless

2010-08-17T03:11:00.004-04:00

Sybil from TGTBTU was super kind and asked me to do a guest review of Anne Stuart's Ruthless.

Yes, the squeeeing was undignified when that ARC arrived but, I tried real hard not to gush my way through a review of *my* author.

If you don't trust me you can read the review here.

Bonds of Justice by Nalini Singh

2010-08-11T01:29:00.004-04:00

Okay, I love this series but I'm starting to find the sexual tension in the Psy books not so, uh, hot.

Cindy Blurb : Max Shannon is an excellent human cop and has even been noticed by the Psy who notice barely anything but themselves. Max has just caught a serial killer (Bonner) and is ready for the next stage of the case. Next stage? Justice Psy - J's for short - these are Psy who can get inside a criminal's brain and search out the true information of a crime from the distorted memory of the killer.

Sophia Russo is the J that shows up and is on the short list to be rehabilitated (basically stripped clean of everything - vegetablized). Apparently J's break and it's common for them to have to go to the rehabilitation center often for 'repair'. Sophia knows she doesn't have much longer and her cracks are obvious even to the medics but they want to keep her around as long as possible.

Max and Sophia notice each other and then work a case together. Sophia is all but dead and knows that she wants to explore the fascination she has for Max and hey, Max is already all for it.

And the dance begins.

Yep, there is a bunch I have left out buy hey, read the book. That said, how did I like it?

Ho-hum and I don't like saying it. I don't know, there is a sameness in the way a human/changeling has to approach a Psy and it has been covered in previous books in the series. It's slow because Psy are rarely touched so a simple kiss can cause them to black out. We've been there and seen it and sure, there are different Psy designation but we've seen the female Psy being seduced. Which might be why I loved Judd's book (male Psy) who had to overcome his sensations to be at least equal in dominance with his changeling mate.

Scary enough the parts of the book I really liked were with the secondary characters who have already had their stories told. In the end, I enjoyed the overall story arc about the Psy and what will come next in their fight for survival. Hell, I'm more intrigued now about members of the Psy council and I've always found those parts hard to figure out.

In the end, I think this series is supposed to be more about the Psy and their collective future but for me, it's more about the changelings and having read the excerpt for the next book all I can say is YEAH BABY!!

And Hawke and Sienna's book can't come fast enough.

All that said, this is not one of the books I'll remember in the series which makes me sad, but there it is. It's a good book but I felt I already knew the story.

C+

Just Because

2010-08-04T22:52:00.003-04:00

Here's a picture of Em with all her fur grown back in.

I was just telling Ames that Em has either forgiven us for Pixie or is finally getting over her depression about Amber. I'm thinking both.

Em's fur has changed to the softest thing on the planet. Not only that but now she has brown spots in the black parts which is so cute.

She purrs like an engine still and will let me kiss her on the nose (Amber was never happy about that and Kitten has followed in her footsteps) and now she will get up on the desk when Bob is eating something and will eat from the other side. So she is definitely up to her old shenanigans. Maybe she feels Pixie needs to learn some new tricks.

August?

2010-08-03T22:41:00.003-04:00

It's already August but I can't complain (except for that darn ear infection) because the weather has been pool friendly for the most part.

I learned yet another lesson this past week. Don't leave your only pair of ear plugs out in your goggles. Kitten can find anything and I guess the two tiny pieces of silicone did her in and setting them inside something probably added that extra ommph needed to make it just too inticing to leave be.

So tomorrow is 'buy a bunch of ear plugs' day so I can get back in the pool already!

I'm waiting for 11pm so I can call Bob before he goes to sleep. He's away for the week and will somehow end up in New York City at some point. Lucky guy. Course, I couldn't do just one day in NYC. I would want to plan it all out - so when my mother asked why I wasn't going with Bob on this trip I just said I needed to stay home with the cats. After all, it's a business trip and staying in a hotel for a few days, although nice, isn't the same as sitting on my duff at home with no one around to bug me. And it's pool season!

On the reading front I have started Singh's latest but I'm struggling with it. Nath has already reviewed the book (I only read parts of her thoughts so I didn't get spoiled) and mentioned that she wanted to see something a bit different and I get what she means so far. We'll see if I change my mind when I'm done reading. Bad to judge a book before you are finished but when you feel you've met these characters before it's hard.

Other than that, we're busy with peeps coming and going and trying to keep the house up to some standard of clean.

Oh, we have moved out of the master bedroom and into a front room so Bob can start demo. In reality it shouldn't be that much work - remove two built ins (lots of plaster dust I'm betting), tear up the floor and put down new hardwood, re-plaster, paint and trim. In the realm of reno-ing, this sounds fairly uncomplicated.

Bob says it will be done end of October.

I didn't ask what year.

What a Difference a Decade Makes

2010-07-27T00:21:00.002-04:00

Short post about age.

When I turned 30 I remember waiting for something to happen. I didn't know what but I figured something life changing would happen.

Nothing.

Now, almost 10 years later and it's a whole new ball game.

Basically 40 gives and takes.

Here's your extra 40 pounds and in exchange I'll take your eyesight.

Blergh.

Life is going to be about 'where the hell are my glasses' and dieting.

40's the new 30, my ass.

Hi Ya!

2010-07-22T02:42:00.002-04:00

Hey guys!!

Hope you are staying cool in this awful suppressing heat. I'm loving it because it's pool time all the time and I bought these drops that help prevent swimmer's ear (I got SE in both ears last year and it cut into my swimming time like nothing else) so yeah, I'm all in!

Updated - famous last words. I got Swimmer's Ear the next night and the weekend was so brutal it was all I could do not to puke. So now I have stronger drops for my ears but I will definitely be wearing ear plugs from now on. Not wanting to do anything for 5 days including swim in the pool sucks giant spider donuts.

Good news - I bought books and I'm talking books I'm very excited to start reading.

I should note the movements of people for the last few weeks has crimped my reading and that is why I'm still clutching my Anne Stuart ARC to my chest. I'm half way through and loving it but I'm doing up a review for Sybil at that crazy Duck place so I'll post when I get it finished and when Sybil puts it up.

Update 2 - I finished the Stuart and have written the first draft of the review - I haven't written a book review *cough* in so long that it's like extracting teeth.

Books:

I'll start with the fact that Chapters had their buy 3 get the 4th free sale and damn, I'm a slut for a book sale although I did only buy 4 at one time. Not realizing we were in July I was shocked I had missed a few great titles but I quickly fixed that oopsie.

I have three auto-buy authors - Anne Stuart (*gasp* I know, I'm so quiet about my love!), Kresley Cole (her next book comes out August 24th, the day before my birthday - how sweet that she thought to get me a gift!) and Nalini Singh (Bad Cindy hasn't read the 2nd Archangel book cause I'm not sure I'm sold on the premise. I do own the book though).

Now for those authors out there *crickets*...

Like silence is going to stop me.

For those who get author newsletters and think 'meh', I have to say that Kresley Cole's last one managed to get under me 'meh' feeling and got me to buy some books by an author I have yet to read.

How?

She recommended them.

I know, right!

I'm not usually so susceptible to suggestion. *cough, wheeze*

See, I started to read the newsletter because I needed to know when her next book was coming out. (Aug 24th, just in case you haven't heard) and I got swept up in my glee and kept on reading. Hey, while I wait for that book I'll climb over customer service to get to (yes, there is a story there), why don't I try Gena Showalter's Underwater series.

What's that now? Something to get me through in-between auto-buy books?

I'm in!

I mentioned the sale, right?

'kay.

I bought all three (dang, wonder if it's a trilogy or if there will be more - I'll check that later - Great Scot!! It's bigger than a trilogy and one of the books is a combo of the other two I bought - crap!) of Showalters Underworld series books. The Darkest Pleasure, The Darkest Night and Into the Dark.

Why?

Cause Kresley Cole told me too.

The awesome power of the newsletter.

Jennifer Ashley's Lady Isabella's Scandalous Marriage came out under my radar but then, I get this author mixed up with Amanda Ashley (who's on my 'no buy' list for stupid reasons like vampires wanting to be cured - it was years ago but for some reason that ending stuck with me. Sorry, I have no clue which book it was). This is the author who wrote the Madness of Lord Ian and since I really enjoyed that one I thought I might try this book. Although if I remember rightly I didn't really like any of his brothers. We'll see.

Oh, and there happened to be a paranormal on the shelf by Jennifer Ashley called Pride Mates which promptly dropped into my hot little hands.

And then out of no where, I decided to buy a Tessa Dare book - it's called Twice Tempted by a Rogue. *shrug* I've heard mostly good things but I'm not sure she's for me. Guess my subconscious decided I needed to actually read one of her books before the final verdict.

Finally - Nalini Singh's Bonds of Justice cause like I said above, auto - buy author.

And a book I read in 8 hours over one day (I haven't sat and read a book in a day in years) Lisa Kleypas' Love in the Afternoon. It was a great book and well worth spending time with.

Okay, that's it for now. I'm a touch grouchy and tired so I'll sign off.

H0pe summer is being kind to ya!

Happy Summer To Ya!

2010-06-20T23:21:00.002-04:00

Hey there, sorry about that, I was definitely getting lost out there in facebook land and pool land and tv land.

I'm doing just fine for someone 5 weeks into anxiety counseling. Fun, fun, fun. Ugh.

The whole anxiety thing is anxiety inducing for many reasons and hence, my rate of sitting in a chair long enough to do anything other than watch TV is far from normal.

I have that bouncing leg thing. Don't know if you have it or if you know someone with it but my knee is out of control. Bob will reach under a table to stop it from bouncing if he can see it or feel it. So yeah, my anxiety shows up physically with my knee. After that, it's all in the brain.

Anyways, I've been driving twice a week about 30 minutes from home and trying to stay there without panicking. This week it was nothing, even with leaving my 'anxiety' pills at home. So definitely progress. My goal is to get out to friends homes an hour away (like to Kristie's) without having a melt down.

That said, there are 7 more weeks of cognitive behavioral therapy. Fun!

I have been buying books but like I said, sitting is next to impossible. Although Sybil sent me a little prize that I started the other day and YUM, I can't wait to sit and read it. I'm thinking Wednesday as Tuesdays are counsel days.

Bob has been traveling up a storm for work, big changes happening so lots of upheaval but I try to remember to be grateful and remember that we have it much better than most people. I have to remind Bob every once in a while also. He's actually not as phased by all that is happening. He's been there, done it and knows stuff will either go on or not. He can only do his best in his job, after that, it's out of our hands.

When Bob travels I'm useless. I'm not sure why but I flake out and barely move. Course, this year allergies hit me something fierce just around the time his traveling started, so I took Benedryl. 3 days later I woke up. Seriously, that stuff needs a warning label!

Also, I've been searching online rescues for a new puppy (dog - I call all dogs puppies). I shouldn't be shocked at how hard it is for me to look at pages and pages of dogs who need a home but I'm always surprised when I log off and am exhausted. So far, many of the dogs won't suit homes with kids (we don't have any but I sure don't want to be worrying when all the kids do show up) or the dogs chase cats. So yeah, no.

Pool's open and we finally have a hot week in store for us!

Part of the 'new' life is more attention to budgeting and well, the pool took me for some serious money. Weeks later we've figured out that the chlorine we were buying was far from potent so we switched companies. Amazing how having a chlorinated pool keeps algae from growing (algaecide is 30 bucks a bottle - I've bought 3 since opening! when I maybe buy 1 or 2 a year. And last week I put 3 jugs of chlorine in for 10 bucks a pop when you should only have to put in one a week.). I want to go and demand money back for poor chemicals from the original company but Bob's all 'let it be'. As long as the pool looks good again and Bob will swim without having a fit all's well.

Oh, I did read one book but by the last few pages I stopped caring about any of the characters and stopped reading. It was a vampire story but other than the hero being a vampire it was basically a western like book. It was by Sarah McCarty - oh Caleb was the title. I did buy Jared but a page in I put it back down. I'm not saying it's the books as I'm obviously in a different frame of mind but Caleb didn't work for me because it felt too isolating. And the heroine was a baker. I know, I'm not sure what that says about me.

Other than that I'm thinking everything is business as usual.

Oh!

A line I would like to see never said again in a movie or on TV is. 'Why don't we skip dinner and move on to dessert.'

Yetch.

That gem was from the movie From Paris With Love - the number of dialogue lines I could see coming for miles was mind numbing. Fun if you just want some eye candy.

The Road - amazing. I covered my eyes for the more gruesome things but it was the relationship of the father and son that was fantastic. The movie is so far from happy that unless you want to see how someone deals with a post-apocalyptic world, I wouldn't suggest watching but it has you thinking weeks later.

Daywalkers - I so wanted to love this movie - it was one I was waiting for but OMG it sucked hard. I hate when writers/directors take short cuts. Basically, if you have a vampire story where real smart vamps are trying to create a blood substitute for years, don't have them find a different solution in under a few hours. It plays poorly.

Right now I want to see the Book of Eli - I do have a penchant for post-apocalyptic movies as long as I can see hope. And hey, Denzel Washington makes any movie worth watching.

So there's life in a nutshell.

I'll see what I can do about the reading but I can't promise anything with the anxiety clinic keeping me on edge.

Yeah, so blog life like usual.

Hiatus - Yep, Even the Lazy Need Breaks

2010-04-13T01:29:00.004-04:00

I've been struggling along for a while.

The last time I decided to take a break inspiration struck but I doubt that will happen this time.

Winter blahs hit late this year and maybe I'm just in a bit of a funk but I'm going to back away from the computer for a while.

Also, I don't read like I used to and I miss it. I'm taking too much time to do other things that aren't really adding to my life. Like Facebook. Ugh.

I need to give up that damn Facebook - online games that need attention at specific times instead of me being able to play them when I decide. Horrible for people like me who get addicted. Bad Cindy.

Also, many of the bloggers I visit seem to be having the same problem. Either no time to blog or reaching a point where they are not sure what to write anymore. Hey, maybe every dog does have it's day.

So it's official. I'm on break.

Hope you have some great reading ahead of you!

Spider's Bite by Jennifer Estep

2010-04-02T23:53:00.003-04:00

Finally! I've been reading this book for over a week - only because of the business of stuff as it was a really good read.

I bought this book and then read it because of Nath's review here. And hey, I do like assassin stories and this one had some twists.

Cindy Blurb: Gin is an assassin called The Spider and a woman assassin is just odd enough to be almost undetectable. Gin's handler is an old guy named Fletcher who took her in after her family was murdered when she was uh, 12? somewhere around there. Fletcher has a son named Finn and these three people create a small unusual family.

There are other 'members' of the family but they have smaller roles so yeah.

On her latest job Gin gets double crossed and realizes that somehow someone has figured out who Fletcher and Finn are and that they are in danger. From here the story explodes with precision and emotion.

And there is a cop. Of course there is. Cause who else would an assassin or a cop fall for but each other? Conflict in copious amounts. Tons.

Like usual I don't want to spoil the story for anyone. I should also mention that the paranormal has a place in the story as there are vamps and such but as much as there was 'magic' it was more about Gin and her life than about the world she lived in.

For those who don't like assassin stories stay away. Gin is an assassin and has no qualms about killing people. Okay, she won't kill kids or puppies but other than that, if you need her services she figures you've done something real bad. And let's face it, that just wouldn't be the absolute truth but it's how Gin sees it and maybe she does so to survive.

There is also lots of blood and gore in the book. Not as gory as Laurell K Hamilton's Anita books but enough for me to look at the spine and wonder if I was reading a paranormal romance or straight fantasy. I'm thinking in the end, straight fantasy with some sex.

I bring up LKH because the writing did remind me of LKH in her good days. When I said precise earlier I meant in the telling of the story. Exacting details of almost every move made.

The only problem I had were repetitive bits of information. The first time an author tells me where all a person's knives are stored on their body, I don't really need to know again. This information was repeated just a few too many times. I think Gin should name the placement like 'the cross of knives' of something. Change it up. Cause I already knew where her knives were going.

I'm also not great with loads of description and well, let's just say there is not a lot of dialogue in the book.

Oh, and I'm not in love with Donovan Caine (the cop). He's too breakable for lack of a better description and I wonder how he would survive Gin and her life. He was a bit too much of a carry along character than one that did anything to move the story. I'm thinking he's a good card to play for Gin but other than that, I'm not sure I like him. Too one dimensional at the moment.

I'm going with a B- cause I did want to know what would happen next and it kept me occupied on the one too many trips to Home Depot during Bobby Week.

Now, I want to read a really sexy story. I'll have to rummage through the TBR pile and see what I have.

Whirlwind!

2010-04-01T00:17:00.006-04:00

To think I would ever be too busy to blog is mind boggling to me. Sure, I've been my lazy self but wow, things have been hopping around here.

Bob was off for Bobby Birthday Week last week and I'm still recovering. My body doesn't know when it's supposed to sleep, eat or anything else. Bob was a sweetie in that on the Wednesday he let me sleep like normal. Other than that, I was up and out the door rain, shine (mostly rain) knowing where we were going or not.

Having been a bit of a shut in for the winter I forgot the way Bob can be. Monday was his birthday so I didn't tear a strip off him for not knowing where exactly we were going. Bob is a bit of a driver. Loves to discover where streets go.

I, of course, need a plan and like to know when we're going to eat and where we're going to shop.

Because it was Bob's birthday I did not snap. I wanted to snap but I held my tongue. I woke up and didn't eat (one of my things) and Bob mentioned how he was starving before we left. We drove out to St Jacob's (an hour and a bit from home) and then I figured we would start heading back towards home and find a place to eat.

Bob didn't remember my need to hit the farthest point first, then I'm comfortable to eat on the way back home. Nope. He drove us all over the place until I finally asked him what in the world he was looking for. He was looking for a place to eat, farther out.

Oh. Hell. No.

I don't remember what we finally did, I was sleepy and grumpy and I was done. Oh, wait. I remember, we went to East Side Mario's on a Monday night.

Guess what Monday night at ESM is?

I'm guessing it was family night cause there were people everywhere and kids - OMG and a clown who was not exactly quiet.

Probably should have mentioned I don't care to eat at 'pasta' places because it's expensive and I know how much spaghetti costs from the store. So I tend to feel ripped off.

Poor Bob.

During dinner Bob was sternly lectured on how we have to have a 'plan' when we leave the house. Knowing where we're going is the number one priority!

On Tuesday we drove to Toronto.

Toronto.

You know, that place that can cause me anxiety. I got out of bed and booyah I was ready to go. Bob had been told to do some homework on where he wanted to go. Homework was not done. I however, managed to print off a few sheets on where we could go just before jogging out the door.

Antique shops are crap shoots. You can end up in a dive or the dressiest place in town but there is only one thing Bob's looking for - Porcelain Ad signs from 70's and before. The place we went too? China. It was pretty for me.

Then the other addresses we had were empty.

Antique stores also pop up and then disappear and we found the ones that had gone under. Whoops.

Wednesday was nice for me.

By Saturday night I was like a zombie. I didn't know which way was up as Best Bud with Son finally tossed her crappy boyfriend to the curb and needed to come out and visit on Saturday. Which I didn't mind as that's what friends are for but by Sunday Bob couldn't budge me out of bed.

I'm thinking of writing a book about Best Bud w Son and the Asshat but she would disown me. I can hardly believe half the crap that has happened in the past week let alone the past few years. So this week has been busy on the phone trying to keep her spirits up. I'm really hoping that this is the end of this guy but I seem to get blindsided at every turn by my women friends and loved ones making crappy choices.

My Gorgeous Cousin took back The Cheater and surprise he showed up at Bob's birthday.

Great Scott!!

I know he thinks no one knows what happened cause he was acting way too comfortable in my house to know I wanted to shake the ever livin' hell out of him. Note I said shake instead of the real word I want to use.

Can't live other people's lives. I just never had women in my life who ended up with cheaters or abusers and then there is my best friend who is so messed up now I'm not sure how she'll make out. I've backed out a bit on the BF because I really don't know what to say to her and that makes me feel guilty but I'm hoping this week I can get out with her so she can say what she needs to.

*counts blessings*

So this Easter Weekend will be busy also. I'm actually going to turn on the stove and cook. BB told her son I was cooking a turkey and he was all 'cool'. She laughed and said 'I'm not sure if he thinks that's code for a restaurant or what.' Looks like I'll need to bring it!

There's just a bunch of crap circling in the air around us but I'll try not to bore you with too much. I'm just glad that the sun is finally shining again and the temperatures are rising. I have had my window open when I sleep and I love it.

I do want to mention I'm reading Jennifer Estep's Spider's Bite - I'm definitely slow on the reading but my days aren't ordinary like usual. It's a good book - I'm thinking those who liked LKH in her early days would like this one. I'll say more once I'm done.

Oh!! Get this, I ordered books from Chapters and have been waiting very impatiently for them to get her. They are books on diabetes for my cousin. Tonight I get an e-mail from Chapters saying the refund I asked for has been allowed and credited back to my account.

I never asked for a refund.

I've been getting up every day and asking Bob if Chapters has come.

I have no clue what happened and I'm not sure I'm up for a fight. Just want the damn books!

I would go to the box store to buy the books but they are cheaper online. Gah. Frustrating to say the least. Not sure if I should re-order again or just buy at the store level.

Hope you all have a great Easter Weekend. Or long weekend - whatever works.

My Gorgeous Cousin and Diabetes

2010-03-17T02:10:00.003-04:00

Facebook makes it so easy to put up a short sentence about things that are happening in your life that I sometimes forget I haven't mentioned things here at the blog.

On that note, C2 get thee back to your blog!

My gorgeous cousin (24years old) was just diagnosed with Type II diabetes - that's the juvenile one where she needs to take insulin. Pancreas is shot from what the docs presume was an untreated infection - she works with children and the doc asked her if she had had strep recently. Uh, yeah, check, check and check!

She's been having problems for over a year - can you believe her family doc never had her sugar tested in all that time? Luckily the people she worked with noticed how thirsty she was and how tired she looked. At one point her boss told her she was going to call her mother. Funny that, but I guess they were looking to the family and asking 'aren't you seeing this?!' and none of us did. Aunt N knew the call was going to come as GC had told her so the day her boss sent her home and told her to get to a doc she also called Aunt N.

Meanwhile, for months GC had been going to her family doc and a vitamin D deficiency was diagnosed which had me scratching my head. Then GC fell and sprained her ankle - hospital visit and still, no tests even though GC was clear about the fact that she remembered nothing about the fall or why she was even up walking around. We all noticed her hair was no longer lustrous and was now very thin. There were signs but in January GC's long time boyfriend left and I have to say I thought she was in a depression.

So it was no wonder she was at emergency levels when she went to a walk in clinic where the doc told her she had chronic fatigue syndrome. GC said her eyes rolled so hard she had to pick them up at the side of the room. Luckily that same doc had ordered blood tests and at 11pm at night the phone started ringing off the hook. My Aunt picked up and was told to get GC to the hospital immediately and when they got there the ER peeps were waiting for her.

Scary stuff but oh so glad they finally figured it out! Her sugar was at like 50 (normal range is between 4 and 6) - a few days later they let her go home and whenever I talk to her now she says she feels so alert. That she had felt like she was walking around in a fog for months. Yikes!

She's an ECE (early childcare educator) and works for little money and no benefits and this stuff is expensive. So the family is trying to help her out without getting my Aunt's ire up ;) Aunt N is protective and tries to get us not to spoil GC.

But we do so love to spoil her.

So I'm working on ways to buy the needles and strips and my mom mentioned the other night that she would talk to Aunt N about buying GC her insulin. Last we heard it was 300 a month. GC doesn't have that kind of spare coin laying around at the end of every month. GC is very thrifty and knows how to save money but in January she started an online course to teach kids with Autism. She's hoping to get in at that school level and we're all hoping that will come with a raise and benefits.

Childcare is such a hard thing to wrap my head around. My cousin says she could change diapers in her sleep and she is the most patient young women I've ever met. I, of course, think she should be earning 6 figures but then how would the people who need daycare for the kids so they can go to work, ever afford it.

That's the pure definition of a Catch 22. She is there with people's kids when they cry and want their parents, she's there to teach them shapes and colours, she's there to clean them up and feed them, in the end, she does much more than a teacher (although trust me, I have a healthy respect for teachers) as she also deals with kids with Autism, Down Syndrome, and learning disabilities. There is no division between kids with special needs and those who need less help but just as much nurturing.

Obviously you can tell I love her so much. I told her once that she saved my life and I meant it. She was born when I was 15 and at the height of my panic attacks. GC was born and the family's attention was no longer on me and I was able to settle down. She's the youngest on our side of the family so spoiling her seemed like a right for me. But Aunt N is scary although she is the quietest person on the planet. You know, quiet person, ginormous stick to beat you with. Just saying. Even Bob knows not to wake the peaceful Aunt cause she'll take no prisoners!

Course, that doesn't stop the rest of us from figuring out ways to get GC stuff.

So I'm looking at Canadian Diabetic Cookbooks (American cookbooks measure everything differently than up here - GC's blood meter gives her the reading and no math is needed. Apparently the meters in US read differently and math is a skill set required to figure things out) anyways she showed me the one Canadian cookbook she liked while shopping the other night. Aunt N was looking over my shoulder so grabbing it and running to the cash was not an option. However, ordering the books and having them here when they come for Bob's b-day on Saturday - I mean really, they just showed up and how can she kill me with witnesses?

She can't right?

Hee, hee. I think this is why I get monkeys for gifts, cause I'm always monkeying around with the rules the family tries to get me to live by.

Okay, off to order a couple of books for GC. One is a slow cooker recipe book which I think will be right up my Aunt's cooking aisle.

See, win, win.

If you don't hear from me by Sunday, you'll know she got me.

Another Week - Nothing New

2010-03-12T23:20:00.002-05:00

Turns out the February blahs skipped out and showed up in March. The buggers.

So we're not really doing much and yet we're out and about visiting and seeing people. Still, at about 2am I'm feeling all frenzied and want out of the house.

Bob's heading out for the week on Monday and best bud and son will come and stay over night Monday to Tuesday. That's rough for someone like me and my sleep schedule. But I find I get tired easy if I'm up and 'on' all day.

Gorgeous Cousin came and stayed the night last week and I was able to get 8 hours of sleep and get up at 8:30am. She left around 1pm and then my other best bud and her SO came about 3pm - went to dinner and then sat and visited for much of the night. So I done good.

I have Jennifer Estep's book in my TBR hands and got to the first page the other night.

Yum.

Now, to just carve out some Cindy time.

Okay, I have a lot of Cindy time but I find the winter makes me co-dependent on the TV and computer. I'm currently addicted to too many facebook games and my ass is so looking forward to spring so I don't abuse it by sitting in my chair with my feet up on the desk all hours of the day/night.

On another note I've done something to the setting on blogger (I think) and the comment pages and now this window I'm typing in are HUGE. I need to figure out what it is I do when the mouse scrolly thing makes the screen larger and smaller. Normally it just scrolls but I hit something and bam, the screens are zooming in and out.

Other than that, nothing new happening. I want to spend money cause Bob and I have been thrifty to the extreme although the last two weeks saw us spending more than normal. Gorgeous Cousin has to watch her money and things like needles, insulin and sugar substitutes are killer expensive so Bob and I bought a few things for her.

Then the birthdays.

Oy.

Best buds are turning 40 this month so 'special' gifts needed to be bought (that's on me), one 7 year old needs a gift and Bob's birthday is on the 22nd.

And I had to buy the antivirus program.

Ow.

The good news is I have a 50 dollar Chapters gift certificate to spend. Wheeeee. Although I'm going to be looking at some diabetes books. I'm sure I can still squeeze some fun out of the card though.

Happy Weekend everyone!

Busy? Or No?

2010-03-04T16:56:00.002-05:00

I'm sure you all know I don't like last minute plans. Anxiety and all that stunning crap.

Actually, it's not so much last minute plans as plans that haven't quite gelled.

Tomorrow I think GC is coming for 'Glee Night'. We're going to sit and watch Glee from beginning episode to the end. I think she wants Bob to join us but he's not really a Glee kind of guy. And there are no places in our home where more than 2 people can watch the TV at a time. So I'm thinking he's going to lose out.

I don't know is GC is going to stay the night though. What has this got to do with anything?

I have to clean up whichever room she will stay in. And yeah, the bathrooms and stuff. BUT, if she can't stay over, no laundry for me.

Also a best bud is turning 40 on the weekend. Last weekend her SO asked if we would be available to go out for dinner which I said 'hell ya!'. I haven't heard a peep since. So, are we going or not? Do I need to figure out what I'm getting her or not? Do I have to spend the money now or do I wait until I know for sure I'll see her and pitch the cash then?

Getting down to the point.

Do I have to shake off the lazy or can I roll around in it just a little bit longer?

Oh and Nath - my plan is to read Jennifer Estep's book over the next week. See, if I knew my weekend was free, I could start the book now, but not knowing, I don't dare start something I can't finish when I damn well want to!

Books On Their Way

2010-03-01T14:55:00.009-05:00

I had a gift card burning a hole in my pocket and with Nath's review of Jennifer Estep's new book I knew it was time to crack it out!

Never heard of the author but Nath's review and subsequent decision that this might just be her best book of the year and it's only March!? made it an easy decision.

And hey, I need to read outside of my box every once in a while but an assassin heroine? Totally in my box.

That is where I ran out of ideas on what to buy. So I went through the 'new release' section and discovered a few books that fit in that online cart quite nicely.

Julie James. I have to say I'm late loading onto this band wagon but I'm nothing if not an avid book buyer.

We'll see what I think when I finally (and we know that might be in the next few years) get down to reading it.

And I like the cover.

Then I saw the release date of the next Pamela Clare book and just had to buy.

I loved, loved, loved Ride The Fire but have not got around to reading more books by Ms. Clare. I'm thinking that's been a horrible oversight and I need to fix it next to immediately.

The next two books by Lisa Marie Rice surprised me as I didn't even know they existed. I don't know whether people are reading them and thinking 'meh' or I missed the glowing reviews. So I took a chance and bought the two I didn't own.

There's a part of me that understands making the books look similar. At least, I think I understand. Is it branding?

Cause here's the thing. How do you guys know if you already own the book if it looks so similar to the one you already have at home?

For J.R. Ward it's 'Lover' on all the titles and damn if I know which book is which. I can't even tell by the covers.

Pamela Clare's recent books also look similar with the bands on the top and bottom.

In all honesty, I bought these books because they all (except the one) had release dates this week! So I knew they weren't in my TBR pile but if I was at the bookstore? Sure, I could check the copyright date but odds are I just see the one book (cause how often do the bookstores have all the booksby an author in stock) and figure, yep, have it. Or, yep, read it.

It makes me wonder about those readers who aren't online. The regular romance reader. Maybe they have way better memories than I do but if a book looks the same and has a title somewhat the same, how do they know to pick the book up?

Being the lazy one I am, I don't want to have to return things so I would be more apt to not pick up the book and maybe next time I'm in I'll have checked somewhere and know what's going on. Which normally happens never.

And that's just the way my brain is rumbling today.

I wanted to put up a commercial like Kristie did that has played here for a few months and always gets my blood pumping in a good way but I think lots of people are trying to post it so here the link - watch your sound - don't want to blow you out of your seat.

Cause yeah, we do have the most square feet of awesome per person!

Pleasure of a Dark Prince by Kresley Cole

2010-02-21T02:41:00.005-05:00

OMG!!

Like seriously, I need you to join me in a moment of silence for the rocking blockbuster this book is!!

I'm not sure if you've noticed or not but I don't give out perfect grades for books much if at all. I can call a book a keeper, one I will re-read with great joy but I also can see it's imperfections and will easily call 'em as I see 'em.

Well, let's just get this out of the way:

KEEPER, KEEPER, KEEPER, KEEPER, KEEPER!!!!

A+

No really, an A friggin' plus.

Did I love this book?

Oh hell, yeah.

I want this book to be with me forever. I actually wish I could follow MacRieve and Lousha (like swoon) through more books! I love romance books granted, but it's rare for me to like a hero and heroine separate from each other and damn if I didn't like these two immortals like best friends.

MacRieve - Garreth - where to start? He's a werewolf without all that 'alpha asshole' crap going on and he wasn't whiny or over bearing or illogical, which I have come upon with many paranormal characters. The last book I read by Kresley had a heroine I loved with a hero I could have clubbed with a 2x4 for being such a dense piece of work.

I also don't normally care for charm in a male. It can come off squirm inducing, like he's played the game many times before and knows the outcome. Garreth had charm but it wasn't because he was a lady's man, or believed he was all that (although he was all that), he had an earthy sense of humour and darn if he wasn't like me when angry. All mad and huffy and then just fine. For me, he made no mistakes and I love him for being smart and calm and not a huge thunderhead that erupts in anger.

Lousha (Lucia) was also a gem with a soft heart, although she didn't believe she had one. Her past is horrorville with a capital H and is something kept secret from all but 2 who know her. The secret is kept from the hero for a long time - longer than I like in a story but really, if I had that history, I'm pretty sure I wouldn't want to share that with the man I lusted for.

Once again Kresley Cole used the 'mate' idea and plays with it till both H/H don't know if they are coming or going. I love that Cole tests the 'mate' concept and allows her characters to wonder if they even like each other let alone love each other. Some authors use 'fated mates' as a shorthand to love forever and ever the end.

In Cole's world I think there could be mates (not that I know this or not) who don't really like each other much at all but who have to be together at the very least during the full moon. I don't want to read that story as a romance because I have to assume there would be no romance there but the concept is interesting and it would be neat if Cole could allude to mates who didn't like each other but had to carry on regardless.

You know me, I don't like to tell too much of a plot because I want you to read it without me spoiling something I didn't mean to. Let me just say that I loved the setting as I think I may have a thing for river boats. That's all I'm saying.

Oh! And honour. Don't you just love a man of honour. Garreth keeps his word and he's so funny to me because he'll mess up and be all 'shite, I really cocked that up.' even though the one thing that happened wasn't something I considered his fault.

So yeah, this book is going in a special place - probably among my Anne Stuart's. I'm also glad that I have a few of her books I haven't read yet because I am chomping at the bit - but I'll wait.

In the end, I think Kresley Cole will be able to keep knocking stuff out of the park because she doesn't seem to recycle her characters. Each hero and heroine have been so different from each other that it's impossible for her characters to have similar stories because each set reacts completely different from another.

I'm all awed and shit. Seriously.

Kresley Cole, welcome to my auto buy author list. You have only two others in there with you and at this time, you're kicking the stuffing out of both of them!

Go forth and read!!

Monkey Business

2010-02-18T00:56:00.003-05:00

So Bob rocked Valentine's Day with a simple addition of a monkey to my collection. This time I knew it was a monkey and darn if I can't stop pressing the little button that makes it talk to me!

I controlled myself while videoing but I did let out one 'ah! ah!' I can't help but make the last two noises when it plays and those darn arms make me laugh.

Emma just shrugged.

Kitten took one look and ran for bear.

Other things going on - I'm into the Olympics but not glued to the set which is healthier for me than usual. Although I can't believe there are athletes who are getting medals even when they fall flat on their asses. I mean, seriously? Remember when everything had to be perfect to get a medal? I watched the doubles freestyle figure skating and couldn't believe how awkward everything looked and all the medal contenders had falls!

I watched just a bit of the snow boarding tonight and was stunned to see medals going to two athletes who fell on their last runs. Maybe knowing you have a medal makes you go full out in hopes of gold but falling never seemed to get people anywhere before.

And I've been hearing the grumblings about Vancouver and stuff but I remember the gripes about the other host nations. I think it was in Italy where people were upset about the stray dogs so they had to round them up - in China it was the real age of the athletes that came under fire.

It is too bad about the weather but then I've never thought of the city of Vancouver being very snowy. Whistler sure but when I think of Vancouver I think of rain.

Are you all watching the games or enthralled in a book? I have about 6 movies I need to watch so I can return them before I own them. Ooops. Also, I've noticed my eyesight is worse than I remember it being. When I last went to the eye doc he said I had almost perfect vision. Now, my eyesight seems to go in and out of focus which is definitely throwing me off when reading. For the first page or two my eyes are out of focus and then after that they do focus. It's the oddest thing - but I did just find my reading glasses so hopefully that will get me back up to speed.

Happy VD!!!

2010-02-14T00:35:00.003-05:00

I'm sure I've mentioned before that I loathe this event.

There was the year from 'hell' there back at the old house and since then I wish I could convince Bob to just forget it.

What struck me this week was something I remember from years ago.

Bob will show up out of the blue on a work day - usually he's popping in to pick something up or whatever. Back early in our marriage I remember him showing up at a store I was at and I was so surprised I think I made a very loud sound of joy. He told me it was always nice to be greeted by such joy by the person you love.

I had been thinking about that time so many years ago and I wondered if I still had that reaction. After a while you take things for granted or moments that someone else pointed out for you drift off.

I was in the truck heading out to get something to eat and saw a car in the distance. My mind briefly flashed that maybe it could be Bob but I sluffed it off. As I got closer I saw it was Bob and I honked my horn and realized I was calling out to him even though my window was up. I was happy and I could tell by his reaction he was happy to see me too. Even though he knew he was going to see me any minute.

Another 'moment' for me (and I've heard from Bob also) is when I turn down the street and see Bob's vehicle in the driveway. I can't wait to get in the house! It's always special but even more so when I don't expect to see it.

This week I mentioned to Bob how almost 15 years into marriage I still get excited when I see him - to me, sharing that with him means more to me than cards and (Lord have mercy I don't need any chocolate!) candy.

If you love Valentine's Day then I wish you a great and happy day.

If you hate Valentine's Day then I wish you a great and happy day.

Stay tuned for the yearly Valentine's Day fuck up. I'm sure Bob and I will step into something, we always do.

Blaze of Memory by Nalini Singh

2010-02-08T17:35:00.002-05:00

Woohoo, first book of the year has been read! *throws confetti*

*taps foot impatiently*

I know I'm pathetic. I keep saying February will be my month to read but it's not playing out that way at all.

As to the story, it was a B. It was a touch melodramatic at the end but I misted up a bit so it worked.

That's all I got.

I don't know, when you tote a book with you every where for over a month you tend to think of it as the never ending story. Not that I had time to read but that it was there, always, waiting and mocking.

But it's done now and I have no clue what to pick up next. I want to read some 2010 books but I don't have any in the house.

I would be shocked too but sadly, I'm not.

Blah, blah, blah - I'm done.

This post has been brought to you by the soul sucking February Blahs. One minute your up the next minute your not. It's quite a roller coaster of emotion for a 24 hour period. Especially when you can't sleep.

Maybe I'm a Groundhog

2010-02-06T02:23:00.004-05:00

Basically I've seen my shadow and curled back up in my hole.

The February blahs decided to hit me immediately instead of creeping up on me like most years.

So Pffffffffffffffffttttttttttt!

I have been working on ballots and write up for the Annual Poll so when I'm not just lazing around (ha!) I'm trying to make sense with words.

I know. Quite a mountain I'm climbing.

Oh, but let me sum up my week:

1. Found out my Gorgeous Cousin has not heard from her boyfriend since the New Year - nice timing on the dick - got all his gifts and bailed. I'm praying hard GC gets over him this time and lets him go. Or kicks his ass. Either works. I'm terrified he'll come out of the woodwork (and he will when this new girl figures him out) and she'll take him back again. She's just too young to be dealing with this crap - 24 and gorgeous - I'm just saying, lose him already!

2. BF has now officially begun a relationship with another man outside of her marriage. Okay, breathe. Here's my thing - she really hasn't ever stopped dating. Sure, this time she managed 10 years of being faithful but OMG get a divorce!! Nope, staying for the kids - who I have explained to her would hate her if they find out.

What I CAN'T get over (and trust me I've been struggling with a lot) is her belief that she could tell her husband that she needs to be with another man while remaining married. Yep. She can't tell him the things that bother her like 'help around the house, take better care of yourself, help more with the kids' but she thinks she could tell him she needs an open marriage. Yuck. Not only that but she believes he would stay with her (and I do to because seriously, he's not much - I try not to mean that meanly but this guy has the social graces of vomit but still, she married him!)

I know. I'm trying to stay out of it and free of her but her kids are our godkids. Enough said on that one.

3. Best bud's boyfriend tried to commit suicide Wednesday night. Just so you know, this is the guy who put 'ass' in asshole. Just saying. Long story shorter - she gets him out of his truck which he had jerry rigged goes back to house to call for help he goes into his shop and starts a fire - she stomps it out and he goes to make a bigger fire but the police arrive in time.

Cut to yesterday afternoon - he's pissed at her because she called the cops, he spent a night in jail and didn't 'take a piss' (quoting here) because he was afraid to whip it out and now everyone thinks he's crazy. She lets him vent (she actually said to me, I let him vent because I had vented to my friends - okay, how she didn't beat the snot out of him is beyond me) - he needs to get help and he's booked in for next week. Not that he tried to kill himself the night before but hey, he should get through the week okay.

Anyways - he doesn't believe he set a fire - told girlfriend there would be scorch marks on the floor (what a &%*$$^*%) and that the vacuum hose he had used to get the carbon dioxide into the truck would have melted away before it killed him.

What a fu^&%^%^ ^%#$%^ &*%^&(*^ %^%^^( with a side of ^%$#$#%%$

Like OMG I would have smacked him over the head with a blunt object.

I yelled (and I mean I yelled) at my friend 'I want you to leave him!' and she immediately answered 'I know you do Cindy'.

Once again, I can't live other people's lives cause I would obviously be up on so many felony charges I wouldn't ever see the light of day.

*and breathe it out*

I told Bob I want a jammie weekend. I don't want to have to do anything but maybe I'll see my Gorgeous Cousin since the Super Bowl will be on this weekend and I never do care.

But hey, how was your week?

Edited: It occurs to me that people might think I'm lying about some of this - or maybe exaggerating. The very sad truth is, I'm holding a fist full of crap back. If I could write I would so out the BF and the BB. With different names of course but I'm sure they would know themselves and hate me.

Still Here

2010-01-28T05:06:00.004-05:00

I'm still here - in the middle of ballot season for AAR so that's keeping me busy.

Also, I'm now playing too many online games - amazing how addictive that stuff can be.

I had taken too much time away from the treadmill so I started that back up 3 days ago. Legs are cramped up but I forgot to stretch out last night after I got off the treadmill so I'm blaming that.

I'm healthier but no lighter for the amount of time I spend on that treadmill thing. An hour a day should have an effect but I guess once again I'm eating way too much. Surprise!

Kitten is doing great except I have discovered I have given her an eating disorder.

Yep.

Since I took her to the vet she won't go near her food dish (the canned food). That's how I caught her the first time was with food. Now she'll hide around corners and look at the food. I'll slide it towards her and she runs. I picked her up the other day thinking if I picked her up and put her back down by her food she might realize the food isn't a trick. Poor thing tore rubber getting away again.

The other night I put her food on the stairs - I think she licked it and then ran.

Poor monkey.

I told Bob I can't feed the cats cause it's heartbreaking to see Pixie hiding under the stove as I get the food out.

Hopefully she'll forget and all will be well again.

I'm almost finished Blaze of Memory - seriously, it's a great story I just don't make the time to sit and read.

Bad Cindy.

I told Bob last night that February is Reading Month. I don't want to hear you have no clean clothes, no food in the house or that it's filthy.

It just will be.

I Bought Books!!

2010-01-24T00:44:00.008-05:00

I dragged Bob out tonight (Saturday) and since it was late there were only a few stores open and one of those is Indigo (huge book store)!!

I had a blast and I could have spent hours at the store but I do take into account the person I'm with. Bob's not as thrilled by books as his wife but he left me to it for at least 1/2 hour before he started to hover.

There were a few books I wanted to buy but I figured they might be cheaper if I ordered online so I left the more expensive books behind.

But, what did I buy?

Captive of Sin by Anna Campbell.

Yeah, I'm shocked too as I didn't like her first book. For some reason this title stuck in my head and when I saw it I thought 'eh, why not.' We'll see if I can get to it before the end of the year.

Sounds like the heroine is experienced. But I shouldn't be judging the book by the blurb.

My bad.

Another shocking buy?

Karen Marie Moning's series that doesn't have the Scottish heroes. I tried a book by Moning but I couldn't get past the heroine hiding under a bed while the hero with his heavy Scottish brogue cussed her out. May have been my mood but it wasn't working for me.

I had planned to try another book by this author but had been stalling. Then I heard about this new series by Karen Marie Moning - looks like it's called The Fever series.

The Book Binge Ladies got me intrigued and I saw others who have tried the series and seemed to be enjoying it. Once I realized it had nothing to do with the Highlander series I figured I had to give them a try.

While looking over the backblurb I noticed the books are about one heroine and decided on the spot to buy the three books that existed on the shelf. Hey, if I love the first book I'll be chomping at the bit to read the second so I caved and bought all I could.

And finally -

Nora Robert's books.

I know, I think I must have bumped my head. It's not that I don't enjoy NR, it was the response I had to one book years ago that had me steering clear. (I can't remember the title now but the father had Alzheimer's and it was the first time I had ever really encountered the disease and wow, I was blown away and torn apart. Crying while reading is so not my thing.) I picked up the Vision in White and saw that it will probably be an 'easy' read in that it doesn't look like it will be an epic family saga.

And since I was getting this one I may as well buy Bed of Roses too. So I did.

I'm going to buy a few other books but I don't think they will be romance books. There are these books called 'Eat This - Not That' that have been intriguing me lately. Best bud lent me her four but I think 2 new ones have been released so I'll be checking those out online. I've already checked one store and they are cheaper online so I made a good decision there!

Okay, off to watch some TV.

Hope you are all having a great weekend!

The Sun Called and Told Me To Get Off!

2010-01-22T00:44:00.009-05:00

The first week of the AAR Annual Reader's poll is not quite over but let me tell you, loading in ballots has kept me busy. I do so enjoy this time of year and I'm eyeing my TBR pile with every ballot that comes in.

So I'm busier on the computer but I haven't been on the treadmill this week.

See, last week (either Wed or Thurs night) Bob and I went into the grocery story. Now, I don't enjoy grocery shopping as a rule and I think we had been out of the house for a while so I was more than ready to go home but meh, we needed bread.

Now, around 'that' time of the month I become a bit of a furnace. It's uncomfortable to say the least but I can manage for the most part.

Thing was, it wasn't near 'that' time of the month so it was quite a shock for both Bob and I when I started stripping in the middle of the grocery store.

I think steam may have been rising off me because Bob started to veer away from me. C-Rex was about to emerge and Bob was looking to get far away. Meanwhile, I just wanted to get out of the store already and Bob kept walking away with the buggy and well, things went downhill fast.

I'm pretty sure I grabbed the cart from the front end and dragged it and Bob to the check out.

I stood there while God knows who ahead of me had to look for that last darn penny in the bottom of the enormous sack they called a purse. At this point, I can safely say death was stalking me. I finally cracked and went flying down the checkouts looking for a cooler and about climbed in. I grabbed the coke and cracked it like a jonsing sugar freak and guzzled until my mouth temperature was below the 'breathing flames' level it had reached.

Bob hid outside while I paid for the groceries and oh yeah, this half a bottle of pop I just downed while standing in line. I actually asked the kid if he was hot. He kindly said yes probably because he was afraid of the lady with the sweat streaming down her face. Bob gave me the 'no one was hot in the store, it was only you' sentence when we finally got back in the car.

I got home and I swear I stripped out of all my clothes and sat without moving for 1/2 an hour before I began to feel sane again.

I didn't get on the treadmill that night because bursting into flames is not a long term goal for me.

Now, a week later, it is 'that' time of the month and the internal furnace is running way too hot to get on the treadmill and not come off without flames shooting from my hair.

All that to say I'm feeling sluggish and lazy because I haven't got on the treadmill.

I did however, grab a small fan from my parents house to duct tape to the treadmill for the next time I get on.

Death may have been stalking me that night but I'm thinking Bob must have looked it in the eyes - Cause that man found an extension cord in under 5 minutes when I asked for one.

Poor guy. I haven't even plugged the fan in yet. But the extension cord is ready and waiting!

YA Books - Why?

2010-01-19T01:48:00.004-05:00

This question occurred to me the other day.

There are many romance readers who also read YA novels. This has always been a head scratcher for me. As I've mentioned before, I like sex in my books and sexualizing a young teen is very icky to me. With the rise of books like Twilight which is very much a love story I wonder why I can't get on board with YA books. I just have no temptation to pick one up.

Having puzzled on this for years it occurred to me that maybe it's because I read YA books when I was a YA.

Hear me out.

As a young teen/tween, I read YA books. I didn't discover romance books until I was 18. For me, it was teen angst and romance (or lack thereof) that rambled through my head. I didn't know it then but I could have been a voracious reader if I had a) the money to buy more books and b) felt comfortable enough to use the library system.

Since I was on a limited budget and I couldn't afford the late fees or the pondering stares (all in my head of course) my reading stash was tiny. Still, I enjoyed all those stories so much. I remember the Sweet Valley High phase - boy, I had a lot of those books. What I don't remember as well are the books that I read as I got older. The ones that touched on relationships and sex more than any other books I had read.

Then at 18 I discovered romance books and I never looked back.

So I'm wondering if maybe I already had my fill of YA books. Since I don't have kids I have no need to read YA books to be knowledgeable about what my kids are reading. In reality there is no open door for me to walk in or fall through.

So for those readers who read YA books and who left their YA -hood behind more than a few years ago - what do you think?

Did you read YA books when you were a YA or did you miss that phase in your reading? I know many romance readers came to romance much earlier than I did so I wondered if that made a difference.

If not, what draws you to YA books?

AAR Annual Reader's Poll

2010-01-16T16:07:00.003-05:00

Being a pollster, I can safely say the next 2 weeks are going to be busy. The AAR annual reader's poll will go up on Monday and the ballots are sure to rush in.

This year we're only running it for 2 weeks so I don't see there being a lot of down time for me until the 31st when the poll ends - oh wait, it will take a few days longer cause of last minute ballots.

I'll try to pop in and let you know how life is going but I'm also going to try and read more. I'm reading Blaze of Memory by Nalini Singh and I'm really enjoying it. Still, too many plans to let me just sit in peace and read to my heart's content.

Although after this weekend, I won't have any birthdays until the first week of February. Sweet!

And Pixie may have come out of her heat - phew! But she goes in on Monday *sad* and I won't really feel better until she is back home and causing Emma heart ache.

Sadly, Emma has finally calmed down enough to let the kitten clean her - Amber used to clean Emma all the time cause she was the baby - so Bob saw the kitten cleaning Em and told me about it. I thought, finally Emma has her role of 'being the doted on one' back. Where it's sad, kitten will smell of vet and it'll take weeks for Emma to stop hissing again.

Ah well, such is life around here.

How's it going in your life?

More Stuff

2010-01-14T02:19:00.006-05:00

1. I'm feeling horrible for our kitten Pixie. (Isn't she just gorgeous! Tonight Bob caught a glimpse of her belly and saw a white spot - I also just discovered it this morning! I swear her colouring changes daily - she has like 4 colours on her Black, grey, white, rust/brown - the white is under her chin, on her chest and now on her belly - too cute! Okay, enough squeeing from me)

She gets spayed next Monday and I'm freaking out a bit about her having to stay at the vet's office over night. Gah.

But that's not why I'm feeling horrible.

Looks like I was a week too late for her to not experience her first heat.

Poor sad sack is about crawling up the walls. Bob was saying the other night he was amazed at how talkative Pixie had become and WHAM, it hit me.

Amber was 7 months (they assumed) when we adopted her and she spoke her mind nightly for probably a month before getting fixed. It was only later we realized that she wasn't that talkative normally.

So yeah, Pixie's in heat and when she really starts to caterwaul I feel so bad for her. If only I had called the vet a week earlier she may not have had to go through this. Gah.

2. I got up today and headed off to a restaurant I drag Bob too every once in a while. I have gone there 3 days in a row now. Today I ate so much that I was in pain for a few hours afterwards. I'm hoping that cured my newest addiction to this place cause I can't continue eating like that. Yikes!

3. After hours on the sofa I decided I needed to get on the treadmill to help the tummy digest. I was fine until 38 minutes. I stopped at 40 minutes as it was either that or puke.

Once again, hoping that keeps me from going to the restaurant for a 4th day in a row.

4. Bob was supposed to be out late tonight (hence my over eating at lunch) so I didn't worry about dinner or anything. He got home much earlier which was nice.

The surprise was when I turned to say hi to him after he got in the door and he stopped dead. 'You look so relaxed! I'm so glad!'

Guess I wore all that holiday stress and early year anxiety openly.

5. I have no plans tomorrow. Makes me very happy!

6. I bought a silly hat for the cats and had planned to put it on Pixie. Well, I didn't know Pixie would hide for 3 days so instead I put it on Emma. I know she looks like she's ready to kill someone but seriously, she was purring so hard because she was the center of attention it was just too funny.

Another Life Post

2010-01-12T15:38:00.004-05:00

I went to the Anxiety Clinic today.

I'm in the thick of it now.

I'm open, you guys have definitely helped me with that. When I started blogging I wasn't going to censor myself - I have panic attacks and I wasn't going to pretend I didn't. I have to admit, I also thought I would never meet any of you in person so I wasn't afraid to 'show' myself. In the end, you have all accepted me just the way I am and getting to meet so many of you has been a blessing for me.

So yeah, I'm open and the uh - you know, I never remember the terms for these professionals - cracked me like a walnut shell.

It turns out dinners aren't the problem (shocked me it did) - it just turns out I had my first panic attack during dinner so I have always associated my panic attacks with dining events.

She also told me I had too many rules.

WTF?

I mean, yeah, I do but uh, I like my rules.

Apparently I'll have to lose the rules. Ugh.

I then also mentioned how I haven't tried to get a job because I'm afraid of the interview *because* of the panic attacks.

I did say out loud to her 'You're going to make me go on job interviews, aren't you.'

But she nailed it. I wouldn't have gone there if I thought my life was perfect as it is. I'm happy with my life but I know I can do better so in May sometime I will be starting a 12 week course of 24 hours where I'll be made to walk into my fears.

I understand the concept - it's desensitization. The deal with me is I had 8 years of daily panic attacks between ages of 10 and 18. They never lessened in severity and they were horrible. I guess I just have to give in and try it again.

Oh, and she told me Bob had to stop indulging me.

I told her I liked that he indulged me. She smiled.

Honestly, on that front, I'm not prepared to do much because I need someone who will still sympathize and not try and goad me when I really need comfort.

And he didn't indulge me on Saturday - he understood and told me if I didn't go my panic would get worse. He was right and I knew it so we faced it. Together.

I like together.

I'm guessing though that I'll be doing a few things in the next year all by myself.

Scared and excited all at the same time.

Scared I'm used to. I'm have to say I'm surprised by the excitement.

So all in all a good day.

Keeping It Together

2010-01-09T10:50:00.002-05:00

I'm just slightly freaking out.

I can't explain it but hey, I'm always game to try.

See, for 2 years my Dad has been in Malaysia so Bob and I would drop in and pick my Mom up and take her out to dinner. Now, it was tough in the beginning but with some panic pills I managed and finally got to the point that I didn't need the pills anymore.

Now my Dad is back full-time and well, I knew it was going to happen. I should mention I had my family trained to know that I didn't go out to restaurants. I never explained and they eventually figured out that I wasn't budging from my house to go to a restaurant.

Now I've been going with my Mom for the past year and Dad is home and excited to go out to dinner with the three of us (Bob, me and Mom). I gave myself a talking to earlier this month about how I was going to be 40 and way too mature to have silly things like panic attacks.

Turns out I'm a big baby.

My father called last night to ask Bob and I to dinner at a restaurant - I couldn't go because I had been up since 2am and trying to sit at a dinner table was beyond me. So Bob lied and told him I had gone to bed 1/2 hour before (I did go to bed later on) but that maybe we could go today.

It's 11am and I'm a wee bit beside myself. I try not to let my brain wander to 5pm but when it does I get a jolt. I think I'm walking the line of anxiety and I don't know whether to take a pill now, wait until 4pm or what. I've only ever taken 2 pills but my doc has said you take as many as you need in a day. I never really thought about it because I usually know 'take pill now' kind of thing and I have never needed more than 2.

I so don't want to google this drug because I'm sure I'll just see a bunch of stuff that'll make me even more anxious and who needs that. Gah.

I'm going to take one now and see if I can calm down.

Anxiety truly sucks. I also have an appt on Tuesday with the anxiety clinic - did it 10 years ago but hey, maybe they have drugs that don't cause weight gain! Could happen. So I think that is playing into this as well.

Enough complaining. Off to calm down.

1000th Post - I'm Chatty

2010-01-05T02:30:00.006-05:00

I went to put up the Re-read Challenge icon on my sidebar when I noticed that I had 999 published posts.

Blows my mind it does.
If you had asked me when I started this blog if I would ever have 1000 posts I would have laughed. Heck, I am laughing. I think this is evidence that I can start something and keep at it.

Interesting.

Let's make this post about reading.

After thinking for a while about the changes I wanted to make in 2010 (exercise, food, prescriptions) I realized I hadn't set any goals about reading. My main fear is how I can set myself up for failure and failure is not a good head space for me.

Then I realized I have been on the treadmill for 2 months before this, I have made decisions and were sticking with them so I should get a reward!

Since candy and chocolate and pop and restaurants are not really an option anymore, why not more reading? I deserve it!

I remember when I used to barely get dinner on the table because I didn't put my book down when the dinger on the stove went off. I remember laundry sitting in a pile while I read every page of the book I was currently reading. Okay, I remember summers where I laid on my bed with a book propped up in my hand for hours on end.

I know other things have taken up my time but I can always make time for reading. And after a month like December, when you come out muddied in the brain and have no creative juices flowing in your toes let alone your brain, you need that pick me up of visiting another place, time, people.

Okay, I'm going to come out here.

Do you find that your imagination takes a nose dive when you aren't reading?

I have a vivid imagination. As a kid, it was way too vivid - imagined all sorts of evils that didn't exist and such. I learned as I got older that seeing a movie or real life show through to the end kept my brain from running amok with the odd its and bits it had.

(side note: I think I need to know more about this Ralph Waldo Emerson dude)

There are only really two ways for me to decide on something. Either none at all (will probably never watch Saving Private Ryan because I have heard about the first 20 minutes of the movie and the reality is probably worse than my imagination so I'll leave that to imagination and not knowing enough about the facts) or two, all in. There aren't any half measures for me because of the vivid imagination.

That said, my imagination dulls when it has no fuel. I have noticed this with TV shows also. If a TV show catches my brain it can play with it for months. Let's not get into how messed up my brain gets with movies that have ambiguous endings. Ugh.

So another way of looking at this is that I have to feed my brain something to play with and reading has always made my brain happy.

I'm going to join Nath's re-read challenge because it allows me to pick up books I have wanted to re-read for years without guilt. Why guilt is ever involved in reading books is beyond me but hey, it's there for some strange reason. And since I don't really have too many auto-buy authors I can read almost exclusively from my TBR pile.

Course, I did get some serious gift cards for books!

1000 posts and I'm excited to get going.

Who knew?

High Hopes

2010-01-02T00:18:00.008-05:00

I have to say that I have high hopes for 2010. I'm not sure where all this resolve has come from but I guess I'm ready to make a few changes and instead of being afraid or overwhelmed I'm hopeful and dare I say joyful about the possibilities of this year.

(This is a rare baby Cotton Top monkey and he makes me happy! - I swear I want it as my new avatar!)

I didn't really think about the year and it only hit me the other night that another decade has fallen away and I feel like it was a 'blink' in time. Yikes. So instead of worrying about things I can't do I'm going to try and focus on the things I want to change.

I already talked about the treadmill. I haven't been on it since Bob got on holidays so Monday is going to be fierce - for pain anyways. But I'm ready.

Food. Me and food are not friendly. I eat whatever takes my fancy and the food in turn globs onto my body and makes me super lumpy. Yuck.

So I need to have an actual relationship with food, even if it's a 'fuck you' kind of relationship and think about what it is I'm eating. We'll see how that pans out but I want to buy the book about the belly fat cure. It's about sugar in your diet and looking at my friend (who has never been fat but because she is so skinny you notice her little paunch - she no longer has it since adopting a sugar free (on weekends it's okay) diet) and Bob, I can see it makes a huge difference in body fat.

Here's hoping it deals with all fat and not just belly flub.

I'll be adding resistance to my 'workout' to build muscle and since I'm a weakling, muscle is probably a good thing.

I'm looking forward to taking time to read now. My dad is home from Malaysia which means Bob and I won't have to go out and see my mom every few days (not that that sucked but it did cut down on reading time). I also need to cut back on spending so staying in and reading and cooking dinner are the perfect options!

I'm hoping some of my online game obsessions have reached their peak (okay, I think they are still there but the shine has tarnished and my brain isn't looking for diversion anymore - must have been that Christmas thing).

TV is always a bad habit but that one hour of hiking on the treadmill keeps me happy enough to not obsess over this. After all LOST will be back on and few new series might be coming out.

By the way, Jay Leno and NBC have killed TV.

I'm just saying.

Oh, I threw a doozy at Bob on New Year's Eve about uh, money. Floored the man I did. But sometimes getting someone to see the reality means a hard lesson and boy, we earned it. We're fine and no worries - it was just that we have a mortgage and then a line of credit. While our mortgage is diving downwards the line of credit has been creeping upwards. I was aware of it because I pay everything. I tried to get Bob to understand but no, it took our LC getting to a point where I said to Bob 'hey, that LC that you think is 'this much' is actually 'this much'.

He didnt' leave me.

So we're on track now and have a plan - remember how I can't say no to BF? Yeah, try me saying no to Bob. Doesn't happen. So having Bob on my side when financial decisions are being made helps immensely.

Course, the next day he was telling me about these dressers he had seen and how they are perfect for our bathroom renovation.

One day.

He rolled his eyes and said, 'we'll just know where they are and I can do the plumbing in prep'. I've seen the plumbing problems that happen when the unit is in the house, can't imagine what will happen if we are 'guessing'.

Living and learning. I guess that's how we roll.

Any plans for the new year? I don't do resolutions as much as plans. Cause resolutions scare the crap out of me!

Happy 2010 New Year's Eve!

2009-12-31T00:04:00.003-05:00

Hope you all have festive plans.

Or you know, have plans more like mine and Bob's. Movies, jammies, munchies.

I'm not a lover of this holiday (can really depress me if I let it) but I hope you all get to celebrate the way you wish!

I hope for more reading time - I should say I hope my brain gives me a break and lets me read more.

Great health of course. Not sure how that will work for me this year - I have to go to that anxiety clinic for the next few months. There is a deep part of me that wants to be drug free but I'm not sure that's realistic for me. Having had panic attacks for most of my life, I'm not sure my body wouldn't start attacking me at the first sign of release. I'm sick of the side effects and quite frankly the body fat is holding on hard and I'm not sure I can start working out 2 hours a night. I mean, I can but would it help at this point?

This is also the year I turn 40. Sadly I have a friend who believes this is 'old' and I'm having a hard time keeping her negative thoughts out of my head.

I can't imagine what the year will bring but I'm going to continue with my move towards moving more (walking on the treadmill has helped my mood and my energy - now I have Wii fit to figure out) and saying 'yes' more. Unless I hate the question - then I have to learn to say no more.

I'm sleepy tonight so I'm going to head up and watch some TV.

Have a safe and Happy New Year celebration!

Hope You Had The Time of Your Life

2009-12-28T02:10:00.004-05:00

Hope you all had a great Christmas - I'll be recovering for weeks.

In the realm of TMI I had the period from hell on Christmas Day. Since I was hosting I didn't take any pain pills because they normally knock me out. 4pm on Christmas day - Bob is napping, everyone else is playing and I'm on the couch thinking about how I'm just not going to make it. I was going to fall over or pass out or something. I took some tylenol and it took the edge off for the next few hours and I was able to get dinner served. After that I just looked at Bob and said I was done. Thankfully everyone else cleaned up after dinner as I couldn't move.

To say I ache all over is an understatement. I pulled stupid from the hat a few days before Christmas and wrapped all the gifts in one go. It was only when I stood up that I remembered why you don't do that. Sometime on Boxing Day I felt my shoulder muscle give like tearing bread. I've been icing it on and off since that night. Good thing I already had a Doc's visit for January cause wow, this thing hurts!

In total 4 straight days of people and prepping and cooking and making sure everyone was okay. Today was Bob's family and I totally wimped out and ordered in pizza. I couldn't cook again.

New things : Pixie is so terrified of people who aren't Bob and I. I had to get her down to her litter twice while people were in the house. Both times she actually played dead. Kitty fetal position. I felt horrible for her and some people have suggested that maybe we don't really have a new kitten - I tell them to look on Youtube. I did show her off a bit but like I said, she just hung in my arms like a rag. Poor monkey.

I got way too spoiled. I think I say that every year but seriously, we had a budget this year. Bob ignored it completely. So while he got a new sweater, 100 bucks from Rona from the kitties and a porcelain sign I got a Wii Fit and a HP Touchscreen computer - according to my nephew I have the absolute top of the line technology of our time to which someone replied - for the rest of the month.

It's awesome but of course, there are tweaking things that have to happen and I can't access my e-mail because I have no clue what my password is and the router we have for wireless also has a password and damn if I have that in my memory banks somewhere. So hopefully no one is writing to me and hoping for an answer cause I can't get to the e-mail.

Bob is back to work for the next two days and then I told him we have to have some Cindy and Bob time - crazy how you are with family for days and yet, you don't really have time with your loved ones. Weird.

Okay, hope you all had a great holiday and that you were spoiled. (I also got gift cards for books!!)

I have a Wii to set up, a treadmill to get back on and computer to figure out. And sleep. Lots and lots of sleep. And then reading. Lots and lots of reading. I really hope Jan/Feb are my months for reading!

Oh! Almost forgot. We have to take our tree down early because it's so dry it's a fire hazard. Yep, cut it on the 6th of December and it's been dropping needles ever since. I get depressed when the decorations come down so I'm not sure how I feel about them coming down early. Grrr.

Merry Early Ho, Ho!! & More Cheesy Fun!

2009-12-24T01:51:00.005-05:00

Thanks to best bud from the west for finding these and posting them on Facebook.

Sorry, you know, things are a popping - Bob got our closet done tonight and I managed to clean out that entire room that was on the kitty video (Nath, sadly that was all from my closet - OMG). Then my hubby studiously put away all his clothes like he was a freakin' valet in another life!! We have people arriving tomorrow to stay over night and I got one of the two rooms put back to rights (actually the bedding is being washed now but I have to go to bed soon (2am) so I can be up in time for my friend dropping in at 1pm tomorrow.

The book room is a dust oasis - Bob will have to vacuum the entire room with one of the little brushes (he does do a great job but I wish he had started tonight instead of waiting till tomorrow to start). I found a few more gifts to wrap but for the most part I'm done and it looks like I've forgotten someone. Seriously. I'll probably have a nightmare tonight.

Aunt put a limit on the amount of money we could spend - as a rule we don't listen to her as a group but when she brings it up we try to be more frugal - yes, I've spent hundreds on GC alone but I scaled back this year. Too bad my parents got his with is also. Whoops!

I was also very frugal with Bob's gifts. He's been spending large for a while and he doesn't need anything except more trim and wood and stuff to finish the house. So the kitties got him GC for the store that sells the trim. And I got him a sweater and one of his porcelain signs for the fence. Exciting eh?

I did find a picture of him and his mom that he likes and went and bought a frame and special matt for it. I had such a hard time as it was digital and I was looking for a different picture and ran out of time to send it in and have it done professionally. So I printed the photo off on our laser printer but the paper says it's for inkjet printers. I couldn't find any photo paper than said for laser so I'll have to go with what I have. I will buy one of those GB sticks and then I can put on a whole bunch of pictures and have them printed off.

Another thing is Bob and I got a poster of Santa from our great friends this year and he wanted it framed. Having been through the process before I knew what was coming. So off we go and we pick out everything we need and it's 60% off framing at Michaels. Bob says 'oh, it'll be maybe 200 dollars' and I just smiled. 349.00 I go to pay and stuff and as we're walking out the store Bob looks at me and says 'Wow, I was not expecting that'! I asked the lady - are there people who pay for framing when it's not on sale? And she smiled and said, not really.

So that was kind of Bob's Christmas present also.

Oh yeah, now that I see the picture I remember Bob spend 100 bucks on that light. So yeah, Bob's been good ;)

Okay, I'll probably find time to get on again but just in case you are all traveling be safe and have a Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!!

You're gift?

More cheese.

Thanks to best bud from the west for finding these and posting them on Facebook.

Some Cheese?

2009-12-22T23:37:00.003-05:00

Sorry, it's countdown time around here and things are still a mess.

Hope you are enjoying some down time. I'm not very stressed but I have this 'it'll work or not' thing going on so I'm not very anxious.

I might be behind the times but a friend just posted this video on Facebook and at first it was weird but then it gets funny. Have a look and tell me what you think.

The Fonzi line killed me.

It's a literal video so it's stating what is happening in the video instead of playing the song. There are so many music videos that I have thought 'damn, there is nothing about this video that makes sense'. Hell, there are videos that win awards that could totally be spoofed this way.

Whiny Post to Commence in 5, 4, 3 -

2009-12-16T23:34:00.004-05:00

You guys know I love animals. Yep, darn well giddy over animals.

You might not know that I also have a BF who is Bob's former wife who couldn't save a penny if her life actually did depend on it.

Not a red cent.

With that in mind, Bob and I have been the 'Bank of Cindy' - yes, we call it that. Things get financially rough and I get a phone call. Usually it's fine but there are times when it's not.

I think it's been a 1 1/2 years now since BF bought a used car and borrowed 3 grand. 200 bucks a month was to be paid back till it was done. I haven't had a payment since February. BF thinks she paid until April, I'm thinking she got confused with the normal ' I need to borrow 200 hundred till Tuesday' and the back and forth that that causes.

Hell, I get confused.

I got a call a week ago to borrow 800 till December 21st which hey, she needed to get her shopping done for her kids (my Godkids) so I'm fine with that and I made it clear it had to be paid back on time.

Hold on now because things are about to get bumpy.

BF has a dog that is about 2 years old (if). The other day he raced out the door to play with his furry best friend (has done this since he was a pup) and no one saw but he slipped on ice and fell.

I get a phone call and hear BF crying.

After telling me all this she tells me that the pup has broken his leg in 4 places and he will need surgery to fix his leg.

It will cost between 3-4 thousand dollars.

BF is a mess. I'm in shock and even though I know I need to lend her the money I have a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach for so many different reasons.

I tell her it's fine, we'll loan them the money while trying to figure out how Bob will react to all this.

Bob loves animals too.

But it's not the dog we're worried about.

Tonight I get the final amounts and call in to pay the bill - It was over the 4 grand estimate.

Money is a tricky thing to talk about with people and well BF and I have had a few problems over the years. She knows she owes money but will do things that are completely selfish like go on vacation (not that they are fancy vacays) knowing she won't pay anyone she owes for the few months before that because she needs to save.

I also need to say that I'm my own worse enemy. I don't bug her for payments because seriously, that just pisses me off. She's an adult and should act accordingly. This past summer she had to borrow money and I was told I would get paid back when the 'money' came in. That money was supposed to show up before she left for vacation. I heard nothing. I knew they were gone on vacation and I didn't even get a call saying 'the check didn't show up'. I heard later how she was furious and called and yelled at people but a simple phone call would have kept me from being angry for 3 days.

So here I sit, wondering how this new jolt to our finances is going to work out. She knows that we borrow the money and I have told her she's paying the interest. The minute she hears something like that she figures she's fine if she misses payments because she's paying the interest.

I tried to set up an understanding that 'this' time things had to be different and I got the 'of course, if you think it's easy to swallow my pride and call my ex-husband and his wife for money you have no clue'.

So even though I know Bob and I did the right thing there is that part of me that is stressed about it. I know I shouldn't be. I want to be a better person than that but sometimes it's hard.

The good news is the dog's leg is all wrapped up and he'll get to go home to his family. And I truly hope he has years and years of life in front of him.

I'm Afraid to Start Wrapping Now!

2009-12-15T20:43:00.003-05:00

WRAPPING PRESENTS WITH A CAT

(actually I forgot what kittens could be like with new stuff)

1. Clear large space on table for wrapping present.

2. Go to wardrobe and collect bag in which present is contained, and close door.

3. Open door and remove cat from wardrobe.

4. Go to cupboard and retrieve rolls of wrapping paper.

5. Go back and remove cat from cupboard.

6. Go to drawer and collect transparent sticky tape, ribbons, scissors, labels, etc.

7. Lay out present and wrapping materials on table, to enable wrapping strategy to be formed.

8. Go back to drawer to get string, remove cat that has been in the drawer since last visit, and collect string.

9. Remove present from bag.

10. Remove cat from bag.

11. Open box to check present, remove cat from box, replace present.

12. Lay out paper to enable cutting to size.

13. Cut the paper to size, trying to keep the cutting line straight.

14. Throw away first sheet because cat tried to chase the scissors and tore paper.

15. Cut second sheet of paper to size by putting cat in the bag the present came out of.

16. Place present on cut-to-size paper.

17. Lift up edges of paper to seal in present, wonder why edges now don't reach, and find cat between present and paper. Remove cat and retry.

18. Place object on paper, to hold in place, while cutting transparent sticky tape.

19. Spend next 20 minutes carefully trying to remove transparent sticky tape from cat with pair of nail scissors.

20. Seal paper down with transparent sticky tape, making corners as neat as possible.

21. Look for roll of ribbon; chase cat down hall and retrieve ribbon.

22. Try to wrap present with ribbon in a two-directional turn.

23. Re-roll up ribbon and remove paper that is now torn, due to cat's enthusiasm in chasing ribbon end.

24. Repeat steps 12-22 until down to last sheet of paper.

25. Decide to skip steps 12-16 in order to save time and reduce risk of losing last sheet of paper. Retrieve old cardboard box that you know is right size for sheet of paper.

26. Put present in box, and tie down with string.

27. Remove string, open box and remove cat.

28. Put all packing materials in bag with present and head for lockable room.

29. Once inside room, lock door and start to re-lay out packing materials.

30. Remove cat from box, unlock door, put cat outside door, close door and re-lock.

31. Lay out last sheet of paper. (Admittedly this is difficult in the small area of the toilet, but try your best!)

32. Seal box, wrap with paper and start repairs by very carefully sealing down tears with transparent sticky tape. Now tie up with ribbon and decorate with bows to hide worst affected areas.

33. Label, then sit back and admire your handiwork, congratulating yourself on making good of a bad job.

34. Unlock door, and go to kitchen to make drink and feed cat.

35. Spend next 15 minutes looking for cat, before coming to obvious conclusion.

36. Unwrap present, untie box and remove cat.

37. Retrieve all discarded sheets of wrapping paper, feed cat and retire to lockable room for last attempt, making certain you are alone and the door is locked.

38. At time of handing over present, smile sweetly at receiver's face, as they try and hide their contempt at being handed such a badly wrapped present.

39. Swear to yourself that next year, you will get the store to wrap the darn thing for you.

Not Exactly The Norm

2009-12-14T03:34:00.003-05:00

Poor Bob.

Actually, before I suggest that Bob was hard done by this weekend let me tell you that he wasn't.

Nope. He was just WRONG!

The guy poked the bear and discovered C-Rex lurking just below the surface. And he did it twice in one weekend!

Last night he decided to start on tiling the entry way. Only after he had cut a few tiles did he call me to look at what he had done. Imagine my surprise when I discover that the tiles aren't all uniformly beige. Nope. They have grays and browns and some are just down right gorgeous (aren't they pretty? Bob had me take a picture of the layout so he wouldn't screw it up while I was sleeping. He still managed to put one tile in the wrong place but it wasn't a problem).

That said, he had one tile in a prime location that I didn't like (not in the picture). Keep in mind these tiles had not been glued down yet so I mention how I don't like the one tile and I get a snippy reply about how there are no extra tiles and I'll have to live with it.

Oh, no he dinn't!!

I let that one slid but while moving tiles and making decisions on where they should really be placed Bob's temper flared a few more times. On that last time C-Rex came out and started yelling with the number one thing on her mind being ' don't talk to me like that! '. Amazingly Bob's attitude was adjusted.

C-Rex curled back up and went to sleep knowing her work had been done.

Little did C-Rex realize that she would be called to duty yet again.

Now, just so you all know, when I say my house looks like a bomb hit it I'm not exaggerating. There is shit everywhere and you wanna know what? It ain't mine! Tools and screws and debris are everywhere including my kitchen island (why, why, why are there tools in the kitchen!?)

I can't even put laundry away so we've been living out of laundry baskets (with folded clothes) for weeks but as construction continues the baskets don't get all emptied and then I have clothes with no place to go.

To say I'm over it is an understatement. I can't even keep a room 'Bob' free for more than a day. I clean off our computer desk and get things in this tiny room put right just to stay sane and the next day my hubby has crap all over the place again.

I can't really talk about the Christmas tree and the boxes of ornaments all over the living room without having chest pains. See, there was a time when Bob and I would decorate the tree together. Now, not so much. So I've been dragging my feet and yeah, that one can be on me.

Now, we're hosting Christmas for 11 people this year. Bob has arranged the living room furniture in the best configuration he could come up with even though I think it's not very cozy. Fine. Whatever.

Tonight he starts talking about the ginormous hutch in our dining room and how maybe we can move it to the living room (that room without any extra space) and I have to stop him. Last night while with the family, Bob slept in a chair for about 4 hours, while the rest of us talked and played and one of the things I asked everyone was if they would be interested in having a puzzle set up during the 3 days they would be at our house to work on when wanting some down time.

It was agreed that that would be a nice idea.

So I mention to Bob tonight that I might need to move some of the furniture to put in a small game table for a puzzle.

Bob actually swore and got all mad and said obviously I hated the room the way it was and to do what I wanted.

Yeah.

C-Rex came out of no where.

I don't ask for friggin much and I am fairly even keeled with the dust and crap all over the place so yelling at me for having ONE request was way beyond the pale. C-Rex had a good 10 minutes of yelling and swearing and yes, Bob was a wee bit pale when she finished. He was still in a grump so he went off to work on the closet upstairs.

C-Rex paced her cage for another 1/2 hour before trying to settle down.

It helped that Bob apologized for getting me all worked up. And then I get all mushy and say stuff like 'sorry' when I'm still right.

Let's hope the next two weeks aren't like this weekend cause Bob isn't used to seeing me go all C-Rex on his ass.

Oh, my favourite was how C-Rex was 'DONE'. That's it, just DONE. Didn't give a frig about anything anymore and Christmas could go suck eggs.

C-Rex makes me laugh.

I sense coal might be coming soon.

Reading? Oh, Please Lord Let It Be!!

2009-12-10T01:51:00.000-05:00

I haven't been able to sit still to read a book in a while and let me tell you I'm feeling it.

I'm grumpier and easily frustrated and I feel all stale in my brain.

Odd really.

I'm hoping the tree and the house will be decked out by the weekend. I'll start wrapping and OMG cards!! I forgot I have to do cards!

Then I'll do up the 'menu' for the three days family will be in the house so I know what I have to buy before the day AND ...

I'll try not to beat my head against a wall over thinking a gift for Bob. I'm just so out of options. In reality some coins have been dropping from Bob's pockets the last few weeks and since I know there will be a 10 % pay decrease in the New Year I'm a little touchy about money.

No, no, I'm grateful and blessed. I just don't want to over spend on Christmas this year. Problem is Bob's not always on the same field as I am and I end up with something that cost an arm and a leg and Bob's sitting with a few new shirts. I'm just saying. I shouldn't be the only one 'aware' of money.

In the New Year I'm going to become the HAMMER. Yep, I'm going to drop on the poor guy like iron.

I should feel bad but uh, no.

I so can't work my Princess ways in the poor house!

Christmas for Adults

2009-12-09T01:00:00.002-05:00

Welcome Advent Adventurers, hope you have been enjoying all the sights, sounds and recipes that have been shared! (I sure have!)

This post will be something a little different.

See, in our family, there are no children. Our youngest on Christmas is 24 years old now and the rest of us aren't exactly 'needing' anything nowadays. We've got the appliances and towels and blankets and a few years ago it became obvious that there wasn't anything any of us needed.

Christmas shopping became a horrid chore.

No really.

What do you buy for the people who have everything? (Okay, we don't have everything but I'm not buying anyone a sports car and how many years in a row do I need to buy my mother slippers!)

So Bob and I changed a few things up.

First time we realized it wasn't so much the gift as the novelty was when Bob built a wooden box around a gift for my Dad. He was able to build looking holes that went all the way through the box and others that had a little sign inside that said 'no peeking!'.

My father had to get a crowbar out to open the gift and in the end it wasn't the garden bell in the gift that had the family buzzing, it was the few days before, the curiosity of what it could possibly be that made the gift so much fun.

And that's when in almost a sigh of relief the entire family let the stress of gifting go. There was no meeting or discussion, it just happened.

Now it's about seeing a huge smile or a flat out belly laugh when one of us opens a gift.

For me, it's monkeys. I make monkey noises I get excited and name the monkey the minute I see it. I'm not sure how it is they can still get a reaction out of me but every year a silly monkey shows up and makes me laugh. (You can't see it but the baby monkeys all have goofy grins on their faces - this special bookend keeps me smiling to this day!)

For my father it's Owls and Eagles. This year we found an owl tea pot, an outrageous owl plaque and yes, a pencil with a silly owl on the top.

My Aunt was everything Mexican and I outdid myself when I bought her a giant purple Mexican sombrero.

For my hubby, it's anything 50's inspired or diner inspired. One year a few great minds thought alike and he ended up with two hot dog roller cookers (much to my chagrin).

So in the end, it wasn't about the gift for us anymore. It was about getting a reaction from the person getting the present. As my Dad notably said, 'I don't care if you get rid of it tomorrow, your reaction was enough for me'. And in the end, it seems the family agrees with him.

So if you just can't come up with an idea for that one person maybe play it outside of the box. Who knows you just might discover another side of your friends and family!

I wish you all a very Merry Christmas indeed!

For more fun visit:

Lexi @ The Amazing Adulthood of Alexis
Lesley @ A Life in Books
Kim @ Page After Page

Uh Houston - yeah, you know.

2009-12-07T20:22:00.002-05:00

Problem?

I strung up all the lights on our freshly cut Christmas tree (let me tell you, this tree doesn't have a soft spot anywhere and getting the lights up was like playing with a porcupine).

Every time I plug the tree in 2/3 of the tree blows out.

We've discovered a bulb that acts like a fuse and it blows out instead of maybe an entire string blowing out. We've changed that bulb a few times but the darn thing keeps tripping.

In all honesty, I so don't want to have to unravel all the lights off the tree as Bob has suggested.

So I'm wondering if there is anyone out there that has had a similar problem?

I'm wondering if I should put in another extension cord and run half the lights off a separate plug. Hey, it's all I got and I'm not sure the lights were made to have all 800 run off one circuit.

Wish me luck.

If you hear a roar sometime tomorrow it will be me, unraveling the darn strings off the tree.

Figures this season wouldn't start out easy.

Grrrr!!

The Kittens

2009-12-06T21:05:00.003-05:00

Yep, I'm the crazy cat lady.

One look at the bed in the first video and you know why I'm not reading, blogging or in general, sleeping.

But the kitties managed a few milestones today so I'm sharing.

Later in the evening Pixie got even closer!

Yep, I do voices for the cats.

But you knew I wasn't all there in the noggin'

Hope you all had a great weekend! Bob was off on Friday so we got a lot done, were able to go visit friends and got the tree up (not decorated).

In a couple days I will be blogging for the Virtual Advent Tour - you can click on the avatar at the top right hand corner to visit other blogs and read how other people are celebrating the holidays!

Okay, I've been up since 5am.

I know!

It's now 9pm and I'm beat. Off to bed soon!

December Already!?

2009-12-01T15:25:00.002-05:00

I tell ya, I have no clue where Oct/Nov went but BAM it's December!

Anxiety has decided to take me head on and I'm not sure what it's beef is but fun it ain't. I've caught myself a few times just wanting to head back home because I wasn't 'feeling right'. Realizing a bit late it was anxiety kept me from making bad decisions and I kept on heading in the right direction. Eg. going to breakfast with my BF on Monday morning instead of calling her back 20 minutes before we were to meet to say 'can't' and knowing she would understand. Also thinking about how far from home one of my destinations was today and not turning the car around when the anxiety hit.

So I'm winning but I wish it'd just back off me already.

Then there is the sleep.

All torqued up and knowing that I don't really operate the same during daylight hours doesn't help. That said, I'm getting some of the errands off the list. I'm also hoping to get most if not all my Christmas shopping done this week.

My biggest problem (and maybe why I'm anxious) this year is I have not one clue for Bob. I don't want to spend gobs of money and at the same time I don't want to buy him clothes and stuff (which I do normally buy for him).

Bob, bless him, keeps saying the fence and the renos he's been doing are his present. And really, they should be, cause - wow.

But that's not the point of Christmas so I'm going to have to put the thinking cap on and get on it.

I've decided this time of year is useless for me and reading.

Add Bob and his plaster dust to the equation and my entire (and yes, entire) house needs to be cleaned from top to bottom. Thing is I only want to have to do it once. So I've been waiting to see what else Bob's going to decide on doing before Christmas.

My Gorgeous Cousin has already commented about the last time we hosted Christmas and how Bob had still been working on the bathroom on the Eve.

I didn't throw anything at her.

And on a 'bloody hell' note, her boyfriend is still around.

Makes my skin crawl but I guess I have to let her live her own life.

So that's the weekly update. Hopefully I'll watch a great movie or something and my blogging mojo will re-emerge.

Bob's New Lament

2009-11-25T21:32:00.002-05:00

It's also my new lament.

WTF!? Why are we hearing about a green Christmas yet again!!

See, Bob and I get to host Christmas once every three years. This year it's our year (and boy do I need to get cracking but that's for another post) and we are hearing that snow will probably not be in the forecast.

3 years ago there was no snow. In fact, it was a beautiful balmy day that had us wearing T-shirts outdoors. Green, green, green.

The last 2 years have been white in the extreme. Bob and I have traveled in some seriously bad weather but hey, it's Christmas and I'll turn will come around again.

Bah.

Maybe new tradition this year. Christmas day swim. Too bad we closed the pool already.

Ah well.

Happy Thanksgiving to all our American Friends! I wish you all great heath and comfort and try not to head out shopping on that black Friday day (or maybe it's another colour) - just stay safe!

How Time Flies!

2009-11-22T02:25:00.006-05:00

Sorry!

I've been a touch busy and by busy I mean I procrastinated all week while trying to write up Mini-poll results.

Bad Cindy.

They should be out next week sometime.

Okay, so where were we?

Right.

I'm all good. NyQuil is worth every dime let me tell ya. I didn't feel great Friday but by Sunday morning right as rain. Yay!

Tuesday (I think it was Tues or maybe Wed) I went and stood in the public line up for the H1N1 shot. It was finally opened to everyone. Bout friggin' time. Meanwhile, the people in the line were the elderly and kids. So, where you people been for the 3 weeks you could have had the line to yourself!? It was an 1 1/2 wait but I brought a book and people were envious of my intelligence for not showing up with nothing but the clothes on my back. Duh.

For those wanting to know the book - Blaze of Memory by Nalini Singh (haven't had time to get back to it but I have enjoyed the start!)

The rest of the week is a bit of a blur.

So get this. I'm now addicted to the treadmill. I can't go a night without getting on the damn thing. I was up to 50 minutes every night.

Now, last night I kinda hurt myself. See, I walk on the treadmill in the dark.

No!! I can explain!

The room the treadmill is in has had it's shades removed (BOB!!!!) and if I put on the light during the night people can see in. Normally no big deal except my neighbour comes home at all different hours of the night so I don't want anyone seeing me in my sweaty clothes with my droopy pony-tail. Yes. I know the world doesn't revolve around me but hey, people don't need a mental imagine of me sweating to whatever I got playing on my iPod.

So yeah, the dark. The only light in the room is from my iPod and I'll flash it at the information board every once in a while to see how long I've been on or what my speed is.

Well, last night I was doing the speed of the treadmill by touch. I would push the 'speed up' button twice which should have meant I was at a comfortable 2.8. So I'm walking along.

And I'm walking.

And I'm puffing.

Okay, I don't normally sweat like this!?

I feel faint.

And I'm walking.

Finally I flash the light on the information panel to check the time and I've just hit 30 minutes - OMG, I'm dying.

I then notice the speed.

Ooops.

I had been hoofin' it at 3 for like 10 minutes (I haven't walked at 3 yet since starting because I get exhausted faster)

I take it back to 2.8 only my legs feel like rubber.

Gah.

I made it to 42 minutes before I had to stop.

I don't like to feel like puking after exercising so last night was not a big win for me.

Tonight I've been avoiding the room.

Nuts.

I'll get on the treadmill after I post this.

The bad news is Bob is sick. Yep. Thursday night he woke up and told me he throat felt horrible.

Now. If it had been me, NyQuil. No question.

Bob insisted he had to go to work on Friday. (I love him but seriously, dumbass)

So no NyQuil for Bobby.

Friday night he's not feeling so great but it's not going to keep him down.

Saturday.

I knew he was feeling really bad when he crawled back to bed at 10am. He slept till 1pm. He then crawled back in a 4pm.

I feel bad for him but hey, NyQuil. I'm just saying.

Oh and H1N1 shot.

Bob's not sure he wants the shot.

Boo-yah baby. Being sick sucks! I'll take the damn shot and be glad of it.

Meanwhile, the rest of my family is waiting to see if I'll grow fins or something.

Hope you are all well!!

*sigh* Off to walk on the treadmill.

Update: Bob is feeling much better after I drugged him up. Sunday he spent renovating in the room next to our bed. Where I was trying to sleep with sledgehammering, saws and drills going off for hours. But I'm glad he's feeling better! I did get on the treadmill and I did again tonight - actually hit 58 minutes. Killer shocked.

Alive and Well

2009-11-15T03:03:00.004-05:00

Yep. All good here at Smith central.

Superfluous pic of kitten - you're welcome.

Bob has been on vacation since Wednesday hence the radio silence. It's Sunday early morning and I've finally got a minute to myself.

Get this, went to Toronto on Thursday without any anxiety. It was like Anxiety forgot I existed.

Anxiety however, showed up on Friday night.

Showy bugger.

Basically Friday 1am I get a sore throat and a booming headache - also, I've been achy all week but I assumed it was from the treadmill (yep, I'm trying out daily exercise). I get it in my head that I now have the flu and pull my Hail Mary pass with a ginormous swig of NyQuil.

Friday best bud and son are coming out and Bob is not home. Usually no problem but because I have it in my head that the 'flu' might be in my body, I have anxiety about going out for dinner. I gulped down 2 anxiety pills and made it through. Couple of 'dizzy' moments but I didn't run screaming from the restaurant and hey, that's a win.

Bob's in full demo mode.

Best bud posted on her Facebook on Friday that it was 'random acts of kindness day' - when she got to the door I told her her random act of kindness was to NOT say 'OMG, you LIVE here!?

Kids would love it here. You can spell stuff on the furniture. Every single piece.

I felt bad that I didn't dust before best bud came over but oy, am I ever glad I didn't waste the energy. I woke up to more drywall dust as Bob carved out new doors. *cough, hack, cough*

I vacuumed on Tuesday and the house looks like it was last cleaned in the 80s.

The kitten doesn't know what to make of the big guy lugging stuff all through the house. For Emma, it's all old news. For me, it's just getting old.

Let's see, what else?

Right. I've been walking on the treadmill 5 days a week (I haven't made it to every day) and can do 40 minutes now without puking up a lung. The other night I did 50 minutes but I paid for it the next day.

I sleep better, I have more energy when I'm up and about and maybe it's keeping me healthy.

I'm also taking a multi-vitamin, Vitamin D and Vitamin C every morning. For the first week or two my body just laid it back out. Now I think some of it is getting absorbed into the blood stream.

So yeah. I'm trying to take some good care of myself because the winter months can slay me. I've decided they aren't allowed to take me out anymore!

On Monday I'm hoping to get to Nalini Singh's latest. (I returned the Anthology after Wendy let me know it was a re-print - just another reason for me to dislike trade backs.)

Oh! Final note.

If you buy gift certificates for peeps, keep the receipt and give it with the GC. Discovered one of my birthday GC for 25$ for books was never activated. Bob and my mom always give me the receipts but there was a desk move in between my B-day and now so I lost them.

Out 25 bucks!! Super sucks!

Bob couldn't figure out how someone could 'steal' the GC money because it would be in the computer. Simple slight of hand with another card I'm sure. Or, one of my friends pulled a 'ooops' and didn't load the card.

Okay, off to play a bit longer before hitting the sack.

Tempt Me At Twilight by Lisa Kleypas

2009-11-09T03:27:00.004-05:00

I haven't been hopping around blogland much but I don't recall seeing too many people talking about this book.

I'm loving it!!

I have the last few chapters to read but I can't see where it can go wrong. Unless the H/H die then I'm all good.

Harry is such a SOB and I love him! I think he's giving Sebastian a run for his money but then I never read the book where Sebastian was the villain.

I love it when you get characters that just don't fit any expectations.

Harry isn't a hero although I can't help but get all mushy about him now. I do think there is more that we could have known. He's not exactly forthcoming even in his own thoughts. He just knows what he wants and grabs it.

I would have liked to see him thinking about his hobby while working through something. I think there is a lot assumed about who he is (and I don't doubt he's every thing imparted) but it's not shown in his thoughts or actions for the most part. I think people who have active minds can't help but get distracted by seeing something new or interesting to them.

I guess it's just that Poppy is the new and shiny.

I can't wait to get to Beatrix's story although I imagine Leo will get his HEA before she does.

Okay, I didn't see the time creeping up on me and bedtime is calling!

But I can definitely call this one a KEEPER, KEEPER, KEEPER, KEEPER, KEEPER!!!

For Tara Marie

2009-11-08T00:57:00.004-05:00

For Tara Marie - thanks so much for sharing the things that make your tummy go south. I know it's no fun to talk about but I'm so glad you told me something I can actually look at and have tested in the future.

Every time I eat right now I think of you. I know. I'm a huge goof.

So here is a virtual hug because the real hug would be something that would make you squirm.

The 30 second mark where you start to pat my back in that 'there there way' and wonder if I'm going to let go. The three minute mark where you check your watch and think 'Good Gravy' and by the seven minute mark you would just relax into it and continue on with whatever you were doing before I tackle hugged you.

I would let go on minute 10 because after that, it would be awkward.

Like seriously.

Foiled Again!

2009-11-03T19:27:00.002-05:00

I have such plans that spiral about in my brain that when reality strikes, I'm sufficiently depleted.

Doc's appointment was today. I was ready to embark on a food allergy quest. What in the world are the foods that wreak such havoc on my tummy. I was going to discover the little monsters that could destroy my digestive system for weeks on end and banish them from my diet.

Mission was a disaster.

Apparently there is no 'basis' of food allergies - there is no set of criminals they can check for and eliminate. Nope.

Food Allergists are there for the extreme food allergies. The ones where life and death are concerned.

Okay, from what I understand, if I had broken out in hives they could have had somewhere to start but because the only thing that is happening is in the tummy, there are no tests that can really help.

Sure, lactose intolerance testing. Been there, done that. I was told I wasn't lactose intolerant. I still won't drink milk to this day. I even tried lactose free milk and forget it. So basically my Doc asked what would change with a lactose intolerance test and my response was nothing. Whether it's positive or negative, I know I can't drink milk. I know real cream (and more and more that edible oil stuff called Cool Whip) can cause such pain that fainting has become a very real possibility.

But then, where does Pizza Hut pizza fit in? Can't eat a piece of that stuff without destroying the digestive system for months. That said, I can eat pizza from other places without any harm (discovered this by being out at friends and having pizza brought in - not wanting to upset the hosts, I ate a piece of pizza and knew in a few hours I would be in major trouble. Only I wasn't.)

Discovered cashews can cause some trouble but I have to eat many of them at one time and it's not the horror show that real cream creates.

Still, I know to avoid these things now.

That damn salad dressing there in the summer that created the hell that followed? Haven't the foggiest notion why I had the gut reaction I did - brutal just touches on the pain.

It turns out I can't identify only one thing and allergists need that 'one thing' to test. I understand what the doc said, long story and all that but basically, my tummy will react to food however it feels.

So that pretty landscape I built in my brain, the one where I know what it is that will cause me such hardship has crumbled.

I'm blind again.

And so the tummy has played it's trump card.

I Bought Books!

2009-11-02T17:57:00.008-05:00

I'm easily swayed by other readers. Actually, it doesn't take much to get me to buy a book. Heck, Rosie hasn't even reviewed it yet but she used my favourite descriptor - dark!

So Bob can blam-thank Rosie!

Ava Gray - never heard of her but I love her first name. I'm not trying to be a snot - just hadn't heard her name before but she's also Ann Aguirre who I haven't read yet either.

Anyways, Rosie mentioned the book on her blog and how she thought it was great and oh by the way, it's dark but great.

I clicked over to Chapters from her blog.

I'm that easy.

Huh, look at that - I think it's a paranormal! Awesome. It also looks like it'll be the first in a series. No comment.

Since I mentioned this book earlier in the week I'm thinking you won't be surprised that I ordered Blaze of Memory by Nalini Singh.

What I didn't know was an Anthology called An Enchanted Season was also due November 3rd and oh look! Singh is in that one too!

I love when that happens.

And I can't remember now who it was that told me Elizabeth Hoyt has a new title out on the 3rd also. Had to get that!

To Desire a Devil by Hoyt added to order.

That's it for the book order. I hope it shows up this week but we'll see.

As to life - I managed to get my Health Card renewed (it expired on my birthday over 2 months ago - Bad Cindy) AND applied for a passport this morning.

It's amazing the stuff I can get done during 'normal' business hours.

Bob's away until tomorrow night which is normally fine but for some reason my anxiety has kicked it up a notch. I will decide to do something and then hesitate and then avoid.

Avoidance is not a good way to deal with anxiety.

Still, I gave myself a pass today. Sure I went and did a bunch of stuff in the city and didn't bat an eyelash. Went to call my mother to ask her to lunch and hung up before the dialing finished. Whoops. Not sure where that anxiety nugget was hiding but I let it win for today.

On a completely different note I haven't heard Boo from my Gorgeous Cousin. Bob thinks she's mad at us. I'm trying not to think at all.

Crap. Just realized as I was typing that sentence, that not thinking about it is typical avoidance. Double Crap.

I tell ya what, let's end on the fun of opening up the mailbox to find a box of brand new shiny books.

Yeah, that works.

Just a few Videos for the Weekend

2009-10-31T03:21:00.002-04:00

You should take note of the water level in the bowl.

Can you see the water level in this one?

Poor Put Upon Emma - but look at her fur!!

I'm Around

2009-10-30T01:59:00.001-04:00

I wish I was getting around!

I swear my body has decided on early Hibernation. Except for the upset tummy part. Can a person's body be a masochist. I'm saying yes. Nothing like the brain being ruled by the non-brain stomach.

It's been a bit of a week here at Smith Central.

Bob had to let go of a long term employee today and I swear I had the rot gut for them both. Bob came home and the first words he said were 'I'm glad you love me cause everyone else hates me'. I feel so bad for him but like I said - anyone gripping can give up their jobs to have this guy come back. That made Bob smile. 'Nope, no one offered to do that'. My heart bleeds for the man who was let go because there is no cause - just a cutback. I also know he will find a job once the shock of this has worn off. He's a fixture in the industry and I know he'll land on his feet.

Just a tough day all around for Bob and those he's responsible for.

Some tough breaks are heading our way also but we've made it this far through the mess, other cuts could come but right now, blessed we are.

Pixie is off snuggled up with Bob - she makes him laugh. Makes me laugh too but I know he needed that tonight.

Phew - let's let go of that for now!

Blaze of Memory by Nalini Singh is going to be out Nov 3rd!! On that note I need to check the inventories of my locals and see if they already have it. Sometimes being distracted makes it more exciting when you look and see an author you love whose book is literally a few days out. If I had known the whole month of October I would have stalked the locals and made a few enemies. Bad Cindy.

Just in case, I have no uh, damn, don't know the word - basically it's no skin off my nose if you buy Singh's book or not. I'm buying!

I am a touch worried because I think one of the H/H are human and the last human book gave me a head ache and I put it down. Singh is an author who writes a KEEPER, KEEPER, KEEPER or a wall-banger for me. How that's possible I don't know but I love it when I get another KEEPER!!

Okay, what are you guys looking for this month?