Things I Don't Find Funny

Okay, with that kind of title this post could be one long-assed missive but I'll try to keep it to the one thing that is pissing me off right now.

The Weather:

Canada's summer is short. Shorter than I wish it was. Basically to me there are two seasons, Winter and Swimmer. Swimming has not been happening nearly often enough to keep my ire from rising and killing those in the vicinity.

The Weather Network (how I hate your new smarmy ways) hasn't got a friggin' clue lately. I used to rely on The WN like it was gospel, now it's like they are pissing in the wind and if something hits then they figure they did a good job.

I'm not sure what is going on that they (WN) don't know there is a ginormous cold front with a bunch of rain heading our way instead of the HOT and HUMID weather they are reporting. Seriously, 39 C is what they are saying we should be feeling (humidity) and when it doesn't show up they put it to the next day like oh, it'll show up.

Well it's now late July and I'm calling BULLSHIT.

Poor Bob is keeping C-Rex tied down so she doesn't go on a rampage through hither and dale cause she wants to do some serious damage.

Bob says August will be hot and beautiful. Again, hoping to keep C-Rex from knocking over buildings on her way to Mother Nature's place to ask what she did to piss her off.

To top it all off it was miserably wet and cold tonight. So cold my hubby asked me to turn the furnace on as he went to bed. I was all 'hell no, the bedding and everything in the house is dripping from the humidity in the air' to which my extremely brave husband mumbled 'the heat will dehumidify the house because there is a dehumidifier on the furnace.'

My house is now a sauna.

Hot, miserable in it's current wetness & my brain has decided to misfire and have me smelling burned up cigarettes. (If I was smelling burned toast I would think this horrid summer had finally caused a stroke but I'm hoping the smell of stale cigarettes means my body is feverishly burning off tons of fat) Looked in mirror and my ass is still huge along with the rest of me so that one is a big NO.

So if you'll excuse me, I'm going to take my soggy PMS C-Rex upstairs to mope in front of the TV until my poor unsuspecting husband get ups and I can whine to him as he dresses for what will turn out to be a long day.

Bonus for him, he will re-discover his love of going to the office.

Bonus for me, once he leaves I'll turn on the A/C and blast the wet out of the air.

Next up, prepare yourself for a strongly worded post on meat lockers.