Friday, January 22, 2010

The Sun Called and Told Me To Get Off!

The first week of the AAR Annual Reader's poll is not quite over but let me tell you, loading in ballots has kept me busy. I do so enjoy this time of year and I'm eyeing my TBR pile with every ballot that comes in.

So I'm busier on the computer but I haven't been on the treadmill this week.

See, last week (either Wed or Thurs night) Bob and I went into the grocery story. Now, I don't enjoy grocery shopping as a rule and I think we had been out of the house for a while so I was more than ready to go home but meh, we needed bread.

Now, around 'that' time of the month I become a bit of a furnace. It's uncomfortable to say the least but I can manage for the most part.

Thing was, it wasn't near 'that' time of the month so it was quite a shock for both Bob and I when I started stripping in the middle of the grocery store.

I think steam may have been rising off me because Bob started to veer away from me. C-Rex was about to emerge and Bob was looking to get far away. Meanwhile, I just wanted to get out of the store already and Bob kept walking away with the buggy and well, things went downhill fast.

I'm pretty sure I grabbed the cart from the front end and dragged it and Bob to the check out.

I stood there while God knows who ahead of me had to look for that last darn penny in the bottom of the enormous sack they called a purse. At this point, I can safely say death was stalking me. I finally cracked and went flying down the checkouts looking for a cooler and about climbed in. I grabbed the coke and cracked it like a jonsing sugar freak and guzzled until my mouth temperature was below the 'breathing flames' level it had reached.

Bob hid outside while I paid for the groceries and oh yeah, this half a bottle of pop I just downed while standing in line. I actually asked the kid if he was hot. He kindly said yes probably because he was afraid of the lady with the sweat streaming down her face. Bob gave me the 'no one was hot in the store, it was only you' sentence when we finally got back in the car.

I got home and I swear I stripped out of all my clothes and sat without moving for 1/2 an hour before I began to feel sane again.

I didn't get on the treadmill that night because bursting into flames is not a long term goal for me.

Now, a week later, it is 'that' time of the month and the internal furnace is running way too hot to get on the treadmill and not come off without flames shooting from my hair.

All that to say I'm feeling sluggish and lazy because I haven't got on the treadmill.

I did however, grab a small fan from my parents house to duct tape to the treadmill for the next time I get on.

Death may have been stalking me that night but I'm thinking Bob must have looked it in the eyes - Cause that man found an extension cord in under 5 minutes when I asked for one.

Poor guy. I haven't even plugged the fan in yet. But the extension cord is ready and waiting!


C2 said...

I <3 CRex...from a safe distance many miles away. ;)

Your grocery store freezer section isn't a sub-zero zone? Mine totally is. You could have climbed in with the frozen waffles or, better yet, ice cream. Ohhh, ice cream...

~ames~ said...

I loathe grocery shopping! I always get anxious and then get flushed as a result.