Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Intrepid?

Good morning and welcome to our newscast.

This is your intrepid reporter reporting in that, uh, yeah, I did use the word 'report' twice in this introduction because I'm a reporter and well, I report. Like those big wigs.

Okay, quiet! I have something to - crap.

Reporter: We are here at the residence of CindyS where it is rumored that a rut is underway. We only have vague reports of an ongoing series of events that seem to repeat themselves in a 'Ground Hog Day' sort of way.

Reporter: *puts arm up to welcome man into shot* I have here with me the mailman that delivers to CindyS. Sir, what have you been noticing in the past few weeks?

Mailman: Well, I have noticed that the mail is picked up everyday.

Reporter: Uhm, hmmm, and how does this chain of events make you feel?

Mailman: *scatches eyebrow* It makes me feel appreciated.

Reporter: Okay! Can we cut? No!? Ahem. Sir, we have reports that the person living inside this house may be in a rut, can you confirm or deny this.

Mailman: *shrugs* I just saw the cameras and thought my Mom would like to see me on TV *waves to camera*

Reporter: *edges mailman out of shot* As you can see we have a situation brewing that is so insidious in nature that even the mailman sees nothing wrong with the situation. *Pauses as if for drama but really, the reporter is not sure what to say next* In a few minutes we will have Dr. O. M. G. Iminarut to explain to us exactly what kind of a person is susepta - *Frantically pushes on ear piece to hear producer better*

Wait.

We have breaking news.

Uh, huh, yes, I think we have a confirmation. *nods as if just learning the secret for the Caramilk bar* Okay, we have just been told by a reliable source that CindyS is in a rut.

Reporter tries to act calm and barely resists a victorious fist pump. "You heard it here first on News 24/7 an affiliate of BeatemOvertheHead Newsnet and owned by Redundant Idiocy - CindyS is in a rut. Please stay tuned for this special news coverage of *pauses for effect and this time, knows what is to come next* The Rut, Could It Last A Lifetime?"

Producer: Annnnnd, we're out. Back in three!

Reporter: We need a graphic of the Grand Canyon for the title shot people!

7 comments:

~ames~ said...

Oh man. This is bad!

Bev (BB) said...

But imaginative. We should give her credit for that. Shouldn't we? :D

Jenster said...

LOL! At least you're creative!

Kyahgirl said...

hey, get outta that rut!!!

Last year I went to the 'Funeral Museum" in Houston. I bought a coffee cup that says 'The only difference between a rut and a grave, is the depth'.

Just have a bit of a rest in the rut then come back :-)

Rosie said...

Geez Louise but you are funny. How can you say you are in a rut and write something that clever?

The Grand Canyon? Now that's a deep rut!

Holly said...

LMAO!! Good lord, you're starting to sound like Isabel. Where do the 2 of you come up with this stuff?

~ames~ said...

LOL by "this is bad" I meant your rut was bad. Your post was very funny and imaginative indeed. :P