Over Stimulated

If only is a good way.

The past few weeks have been so busy and yet, I'm behind in everything!

The biggest thing on my plate now is the pool. Bob opened it on Tuesday (we celebrated 13 years married!) and I took one look and said 'drain it'. Bob was thrilled. I've fought draining the pool and doing work on it because I hate losing swimming time but OMG, it's a disgrace!

I'll take before and after pictures of it as we go. Basically it's a huge ass concrete pool that is 30 years old and painted white. The white shows everything and the top portion of the pool has a grey hue as it's exposed to the elements. So it looks filthy and tardy.

We've drained it, we'll power wash and prep the surface and paint the pool blue. Tonight we went to look at glass tiles (similar to picture) to put around the top edge of the pool. It will be fairly easy to do but it's expensive. I just want the pool to look as welcoming as our old pool used to. I was just glad we had a pool when we moved in but now it's time to work on it.

So I have to keep Bob on target as I want the pool open again by the first weekend in June. Bob has so many projects on the go that I have given up even trying to keep the house clean. Not a good idea but even when I clean the room has no baseboard or maybe no carpet or cabinets have been ripped out and now the flooring is wrong. OH! He tore up perfectly good flooring in our downstairs hall because he didn't like it. So now our hallway is just plain plywood and uh, you need money to put new stuff down! So even when I clean I don't feel like I've accomplished anything.

I've never been embarrassed to have people in my home but I can honestly say that I think most of our friends would be shocked at the state of our house and I'm now officially embarrassed. There isn't a room in the house that is up to snuff or finished!

Then I have a dog with an open wound that's oozing constantly which means carpet (that will be torn up eventually) is covered in blood spots or something. Even animal lovers are having a hard time looking at Cody which might be a sign and yet, that puppy will run around the back yard like his tail is on fire. Crazy dog. I'm thinking he'll outlast me at this point.

Also, the past few weeks have ratcheted up my anxiety to where I have started to notice I'm not breathing properly. Huge problem when you have anxiety. I now catch myself hourly holding my breath or breathing way too shallow. The holding my breath thing is crazy and I've only started to notice it again recently. Normally I only do that when I'm in pain but the past two weeks I've been holding my breath like I'm waiting for the final shoe to drop. Weird. But obviously I need to do some retraining of the brain and start my breathing exercises again. (I'm naturally a chest breather - short and shallow breathing doesn't regulate the oxygen supply well enough. Have to breath into the stomach to keep centered and all that. May sound hokey but it works like gangbusters and that's what is important)

Stupid brain.

The book I am currently reading and quite enjoying is If You Dare by Kresley Cole. The book started with the horrid 'I hate you' type of relationship but it's starting to change. I'm interested in seeing where Cole will take it as I enjoyed her first two paranormals. I have the other two in the TBR pile.

My only problem is I'm having a heck of a time finding time to read. I'm hoping after this weekend (which is jam packed with way too much action) things will calm back down and I'll get a week to myself where all I have to worry about is sleep, food and reading.

Okay, some cleaning also.